His Name is Mudd 2
by Sir Starlll
Summary: War finally broke out between the Goron and Zora. As the war rages on, Mudd the second stars in his own adventure, while Hero the bumbling werewolf, the other lead, experiences the advantages of war- and just who is Uiod? You wanted a sequel, you got it.
1. A Hint of War

Disclaimer: I own Mudd. You own yourselves. My friend Nintendo64 owns Hero. Nintendo the company owns Hyrule and all Zelda-related products.

A/N

Starlll: (Eyes are half-closed like he's in heaven.) It feels _sooo_ good to be back. You have no idea.

Pearson: (calmly) My vacation was good while it lasted.

Flashback!!!

(Pearson is surrounded by a crowd of fan girls.)

Fangirl1: It's Pearson!!

Fangirl2: Do the freaky calm thing!

Pearson: (Calmly) What calm thing?

Fangirl3: HE'S DOING THE FREAKY CALM THING!! TAKE A PICTURE!!

End of flashback!!

King of Spades: Sorry to interrupt your flashback, but don't you have a fanfiction to write?

Starlll: You're right! Mudd from the Twilight Generation! Play me out with Life on Mars by David Bowie!

Mudd: (Twilight Generation) Sure. (Starts playing life on Mars with his guitar.) (Yes, he plays the guitar.)

His Name is Mudd 2

Prologue: A Hint of War

"I don't believe it." Darbus, the new king of Gorons said.

He was having a meeting with the rest of the Goron elders. They were being informed on a topic involving the Zora race.

"You have no other choice. They are stealing our supplies and our people are starving. You have to do something before it goes too out of hand."

Darbus closed his eyes remorsefully. "I just hope that this doesn't turn out the way we fear."

They feared a war.

One month ago

"I don't understand." Prince Rails told the counsel.

"We told you twice already, the Goron tribe have been cutting off our water supply! Soon all of lake Hylia will have dried up!" One member of the counsel said.

"We should hold an execution!" Another member said.

Soon the entire room was buzzing. Should they kill them? Put up with it? _Actually tell the Gorons what they are doing to the water_.

"THAT'S ENOUGH!!" Prince Rails boomed. "We shall show them what is happening by doing the same to them. We shall send two spies to destroy or steal food from the Gorons. Then three. Then four. We shall stop when they either beg us to stop, or when the release our water source."

End of prologue.

Important Characters:

Name: Mudd the second.

Personality: Carefree.

Appearance: Black/Grey tunic with pitch black hair. Piercing Mud brown eyes and tan skin. His chosen weapon is a longsword, because he is horrible with a bow and daggers (unlike his father.) . He also has brown hair with a hint of red.

Age: 17.

Side of the war: Zora.

Name: Hero.

Personality: Laid back, a bit annoying.

Appearance: Hero wears a red tunic with no hat. He has brown hair and deep blue eyes. He also has a longsword strapped to his back along with a shield and other Goron weapons. He is more muscular than most Hylians, because he is part- Goron.

Age: 18

Side of war: Gorons.

A/N

Starlll: Sorry for how short this chapter is, I was just running out of ideas on how a war could start. At any rate, welcome to the Review corner!

The review Corner!!

Starlll: Welcome one and all to the review corner! For you newcomers who are just reading the sequel, not the original His Name is Mudd, than this is about me and my O.C.'s making as many puns as we can off of a review. This is the first chapter, so I'm using a review from the last chapter of the First is name is Mudd.

Pearson: (Calmly) Isn't this a private message?

Starlll: It won't be private for long! It's by LostWonder15. The only person who I seem to do this to.

_To Mudd,  
Well guess what Mudd? I'm already dead! If you haven't noticed on my profile,  
my age is death! So HA!_

King of Spades: As the messenger of the dead, I'll take this to Mudd.

Starlll: Thanks man.

_To Starlll,  
Why is Mudd always threating me?_

Starlll: It might be because of the reasons that you wrote below.

_All I did was call him a maid...and maidtress...and coward...and mature...and other bad names! And can you please do something about him on Mars, you know, lock him up?_

King of Spades: How the heck do you lock up a dead soul on another planet?

_He might us his broken bow on me (Bwhahahahahahaha). Anyway, I said I was sorry, geez he holds grudges._

Solo: Yes, Mudd did always hold grudges.

_So I take my apology BACK! And NO Threat can stop me, because he gives EMPTY threats. _

Solo: What did he say? I'll fill out his threats.

Starlll: Here, I have a list. (Hands Solo a long list.)

Solo: Too much work. (Throws the list into a pit of fire.)

Starlll: (Looks at the pit of fire.) How long has that been there?

_He's on Mars and I'm enjoying glory here in the computer, so he's probably jelous. Yes, I know Silicon, I misspelled that word, you don't have to tell me._

Silicon: Did you just... take away my moment? (Starts crying.)

Starlll: How dare you take away eight year old O.C.'s dreams!

Mudd: (Twilight princess Generation.) YEAH!

Starlll: (To Silicon.) Don't worry Sil, you'll have more moments. Bigger moments. More important moments.

Benedict: Yeah!

Silicon: (Wipes away a tear.) Really?

Mudd: (Wind Waker Generation) No. That was the highlights of your life and LostWonder15 ruined it.

Silicon: WHAT?!? (Starts crying like a maniac.)

Wes: Hey! Repeat after me. NOTHING IS GONNA BRING ME DOWN!!

Silicon: (Confused.) Nothing is... going to bring me down.

Wes: LOUDER!!

Silicon: Nothing's-

Wes: AIN'T NOTHING!!

Silicon: AIN'T NOTHING IS GONNA BRING _ME_ DOWN!!

Wes: Now who are you going after?!

Silicon: Lostwonder15!

Wes: And what are you going to do!?

Silicon: Play with her puppy?

Wes: No! You're going to get revenge!

Silicon: I'm going to take care of her!!

Starlll: Attack of the eight year old! Here, you have to start your own journey with nothing but the clothes on you back, a gun loaded with , and 94 tons of dynamite!

Silicon: YEAH!! I'M OUTTA' HERE! (Leaves.)

Starlll: Back to the review:

_Anyway, I liked your story and can't wait for the  
squeal. Hopefully Twilight Mudd is MUCH more decent then his father.  
_

Mudd: (Twilight Princess.) Don't get your hopes up, girl.


	2. Goron's Side: Castle Seige

A/N

Starlll: (Listening to Life on Mars by David Bowie.)

She could spit to the eyes of the fools,

who ask her to focus on

Sailors, Fighting in the dance hall!

Oh man! Look at those cavemen go!

Look at the lawman-

Pearson: (Calmly) What is that song called?

Starlll: What? Oh, Life on Mars.

Pearson: (Calmly) Who sings it?

Starlll: David Bowie.

Pearson: (calmly) Good. Let's keep it that way.

Disclaimer: I own Mudd the Second, Gale, and Rutabaga. My good friend Nintendo64 (actual person with an account.) owns Hero, and Nintendo (The company) owns everyone else. Wow, I did it right for once!

Part 1

Gorons

Hero.

Okay, before I get started I want you to know that each chapter has a main character and the side of the war that they are on. My goal is to make you rooting for that side by the end of each chapter. Thanks for reading this. – Starlll.

Quote: A Hero is made by the times.

The war was raging for three months now, getting bloodier every day.

"It's all because of this base!" Every Goron tactician would yell when a general would ask how they were loosing so badly.

The base was the size of a monster, fully armed with at least 75 fully armed prime fighting men. It was near the entrance of Kakario Village, which Gorons had to get through to the world. A siege wouldn't last more than six minutes.

"We won't win any battles if that castle is In the way. I can't believe we might have to surrender this early in the war." Cor Goron said. "There is no way we can destroy it."

Then an average guard stepped up. He didn't look like much, but he was probably the most skilled swordsmen in the country.

"Sir, we have one other hope."

"Hero, I love your optimism. But we've thrown _everything_ we have at them. What sort of monster do we have that could destroy a castle, 75 prime armed men, before help arrives?"

Hero took a step closer to Cor Goron and said:

"The monster right in front of you."

Then, for the first time in the meeting, Darbis spoke up.

"I like this kid. And I've seen him fight. We might have a shot."

The last full moon:

Hero was scouting for enemy Zora. It was naturally a boring job, and he was desperately trying to stay awake.

Then he saw something that changed his life:

It was a wolf. It had crimson eyes, with Grey-brown fur. It was much bigger than usual, and it's fur stood out like antenna, going every which way.

_If it charges me, I'll offer it my forearm. Then I could use my free hand and grab it by the neck._ He thought. _If it has was in a pack then I would light a fire and make a torch._

Hero wondered if wolves were actually afraid of fire.

Then, the wolf saw him.

_I'm in trouble_.

The wolf vaulted at Hero, and he dived out of the way.

Then the wolf howled to the moon and charged at him again.

Hero grimly took out his sword and remembered the other weapons stashed in his tunic. The wolf tackled him again, but this time Hero was ready. He blocked it with his sword and smashed his shield at the side of the wolf's cranium. What? I wanted to use a word instead of "head".

The Grey-brown wolf was half conscious, and made one last stand for food.

It dashed left, right, dodging every which way. Hero used a barrage of weapons, a bow, club, and a ball and chain.

The wolf howled again, and jumped over Hero, and as he turned around, he was tackled over and bit.

Pain went through his wrist like a siren, and he screamed out into the dark, begging for it to stop.

He never saw that wolf again, though he thought he saw a man run away.

That morning, he woke up to find himself half-naked, and blood in various places on his body.

Present time:

"Okay, let's go over the plan one last time." Cor Goron said. The base was just in view through the midnight sky. They wouldn't be able to see it at all if it weren't for the full moon's light.

Cor Goron went over all the details to the plan, for the third time.

The guard who wasn't more than eighteen years old, about to commit a siege by himself nodded when Cor was done.

"It's on."

Hero flew through the night sky.

Literally.

Goron scientists (they exist.) spent all day calculating how much it would pressure and power it would take to catapult two fully armed soldiers and Hero across four miles of midair and onto the top of a base.

Hero and the two soldiers landed flat on their back.

_Two yards... TWO YARDS AND I WOULD HAVE FELL AND DIED!!_

"Are you okay?" One asked. Hero saw their faces before the flight and realized that they were brothers. He named one the stupid Elder and the other the stupid younger.

"Yes, I'm fine."

Hero and the stupid Elder rammed the door a few times and it fell down.

The three walked inside and sliced the four Zora guards. 4 down 71 to go.

The next room contained one long hallway with a door on either side.

"Strange room." The stupid Younger said.

"They probably just added this here so they didn't have to fill it up and waste space." The stupid Elder replied.

"Both wrong. It's a death hole room." Hero told the two of them.

"A death hole? What's that?"

The stupid Younger got his answer in two seconds.

A boulder fell through a hole in the ceiling and missed him by an inch.

"WHAT THE-"

"GET OUT OF THE ROOM!! RUN!!" The stupid Elder yelled at the top of his lungs.

The stupid Younger and Hero didn't argue, though Hero was curious why the Stupid Elder stayed behind.

The next room, was a staircase that went to the floor above and below.

"Okay, stupid Youn- I mean, listen, I have a plan: I'm going to go up and help your brother by killing the men with the boulders. You have to get to the bottom floor at all costs and open the doors for the rest of the Gorons. You got that?"

The stupid Younger opened his mouth to speak, but Hero interrupted him.

"If you're wondering why you can't save your brother, than it's because every guard in the room is rushing up there, and I _know_ that you can't handle that."

The stupid Younger closed his mouth and fell to the ground. A crossbow bolt was in his back.

Hero's Diary (Encrypted.)

I ran up to the men who shot him and sliced them in half like butter. I threw the one with the crossbow out the window.

Then I ran upstairs to find the floor where the Zora were dropping boulders to find that the floor was completely obliterated. It was like he had blown the entire place up.

I counted 26 dead bodies.

_Let's see... there were 75 guards to start with..._

I did the math in my head.

_You subtract the 6... carry the four... dived pi, eat a slice of pie... 40 guards are left._

"I have to get the doors open." I said.

Then there was whispering.

"Do you reckon he's gone?"

"No!" The other said in a harsh whisper. "He's right there... wait, I think he can hear us..."

I quickly started to look for the Stupid Elder while listening to them.

"Okay, he don't hear us."

"Did he just blow this entire floor up?"

"What else could have happened?"

"We charge this guy and beat him senseless. The boss wants prisoners."

Then everything went dark.

Two hours later:

It was midnight. It was a full moon. The last full moon, Hero was bit by a werewolf without realizing it.

Hero woke up in a cell. He couldn't move. It felt like his legs weren't working, and he was laying on the floor.

"You look really strange, you know." A voice behind him said. It was a girl's voice, he was sure of that, but as he turned around, he didn't know what was behind him.

"What?" It asked. "You've never seen a Twilight before?"

Hero tried to threaten the new enemy, but all that came out was a growl.

"There's a mirror behind you. That ought to explain yourself."

Hero cautiously turned his back on the 'twilight' and saw a wolf. Not himself, a wolf.

He looked down at his hands, which were now massive paws. His entire body had transformed.

_But how....._

"That night you were guarding the castle, you were bit by a werewolf. Deny it all you want, it makes sense."

Hero put his head down to the ground, which wasn't very far down.

_Is this some twisted dream? YEAH! Those guards just knocked me unconscious and this is all a dream! OW!_ He thought as he scraped a claw against his forearm.

Hero looked up at the girl.

"So you believe me now? Good. My name is Minda. I can help you get out of this place, but you have to do _everything _Isay."

_I feel like I'm baiting myself right now._ Hero thought as he nodded slowly.

"First, you have to break out of this cell, so I know that you can do this." Then she formed an energy ball in her hands and blasted a chain on his leg that he didn't know was there. "Now try to get out. I'll be waiting." Then she warped to the other side of the iron bars.

_Let's see... _Hero thought as he searched the prison.

_There's no way out off this prison! This prison has no way out- Hey look! A way out!_

Hero picked up the steel bar with his mouth and used it to slam a rusted section of the bars, and broke through it.

"Not exactly what I had in mind, but it'll do." Minda said. "So you need to open the gates, right? I might be able to help you... but you need to do something for me first."

_What?_

"I need you to steal some papers from the leader of this base's office. They're in a yellow envelope." Then Minda disappeared into his shadow.

Hero quietly crept through th hallways, avoiding all guards. There were a few times when he made a wrong turn and stumbled into a small pack of Zora, and he would have to take them out. Aside from that, Hero was... well, a wolf in the chicken coop.

_I'm sick of breaking through all of these doors! _He thought after he got a headache for the fifth time. _And these guards are already calming down from the break in earlier. Wait, guards! The boss's office must be guarded!_

2:00 A.M. Three miles away from the base:

"He's died, Darbis." A Goron said.

They were waiting in ambush for three hours, still with no signal. There was one moment when part of the castle shook, but that was it.

"Hero didn't die. I can feel it... give him half an hour longer. Just half an hour."

"If you say so."

Hero was sneaking down the castle hallway, still looking for a guarded room.

_That's IT!! I give UP!! There is absolutely no guarded room in here whatsoever. Strike me down if I find- hey look! A guarded room!_

"What in the name of- A WOLF!!- is that thing!!?" The two yelled at the same time.

Hero jumped at the one on the left guard's neck, clawed it out (he was careful not to bite anyone.) and leaped to another one.

_55 down, 20 to go._

Flying through the air from a catapult seemed like days ago, and the strange creature that was named Minda... he wasn't sure what to think about her.

Hero resisted the urge to pump each person's blood out of their heart and entered the office.

_If I was a yellow envelope, where would I be? Wherever my owner put me. If I was an owner of a yellow envelope, where would I put it? I have an idea! There is no way I can find this!!_

There was a long moment of silence.

_OH COME ON!!_

Hero closed his eyes as he stumbled around the room. Then he crashed through the desks and an envelope fell on his head.

"You found it!" Minda said, coming out of his shadow.

_Yeah, no thanks to you._

"Well, I guess I have to hold up my end of the bargain. Come on, I'll lead you to the gates." Minda said.

"Okay, it's been half an hour, Darbus. We have to go." A Goron said.

Darbus closed his eyes and started to turn around.

"WAIT! What was that!?" Darbus asked, even though he already knew.

"Okay, here it is." Minda said, gesturing to the door.

_Finally!_ Minda had made Hero carry Minda on his back. He found that all very demeaning.

"Wait a moment! Hero! You're changing back to normal!"

Sure enough, Hero rose up to his back legs and grew taller. The fur was reduced to nothing but 5:00 o'clock shadow, and his teeth shrank to the average size. Okay, a bit bigger than the average size.

"By the way, Hero, I'm going to stay in your shadow for a while, okay? Not like you have much of a choice."

"Wait! Will you at least tell me what the papers were for-" Hero asked, but it was too late.

"HERO!! HERO!!" A man yelled as he came running down the stairs.

_Who is he?_

The man took of a helmet that was obviously too small too show a familiar face. The stupid Elder!

"It's me!" He removed most of the other stolen armor laughing.

"What the heck blew up that room?!" Hero asked.

"I... I don't know. I was just trying to hold them off when some giant explosion happened. It might have had something to do with the hidden closet. Come on, I'll show you."

"What's this?" Hero asked as he opened a closet by the entrance.

"IT'S HERO!!" Darbus yelled as Hero and the stupid Elder opened the gates.

The stupid Elder ran up to Darbus to explain what happened, as Hero lit a rope on fire.

The rope led all the way into the castle and to the exact center. The two made the rope out of cloth, actual rope, and other materials.

"You might want to cover your ears." Hero called up as the fire reached inside.

There was a deafening BOOOOOOOOOOOOOM as the fire reached the closet full of explosives. The moment Hero lit the fire, he painted a target on the back of his head to all Zora.

A/N

Star: Sorry if it took me so long to write this, but I've been busy lately.

Pearson: (Calmly.) Your writer's block came because you felt guilty about your homework.

Starlll: SHUT UP CONCIOUS!! Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and don't worry Zora fans: Mudd will be in the next chapter... along with Rutabaga and some other Zora.

Review Corner!!!!

_Submitted by LostWonder15. Again. Seriously people, give me more than one line reviews!_

_Yes! the sequel! I'm waiting Silicon, I'm still here...I don't see you barging down my door...i wonder what Ooc Mudd is going to threaten me with this time? Sigh, I need help Starlll._

Starlll: Everyone _always_ needs my help! Do something for yourself!!

_I have a mad soul after me AND an eight year old. I KNOW. I will mispell something on purpose, okay? Mdd (Mudd)._

Starlll:You misspelled the word "misspell." It's not the same. Besides, Sil is already gone.

_Go ahead and whine about it oh and you can play with my puppy!...can't really say anything until the story starts (minus the prologue), but I can't wait! So, who exactly is Hero?_

Starlll: They're going to be arch enemies because Mudd is with the Zora and Hero is with the Gorons.

_Are they going to be arch enemies because Mudd is with the Zora and Hero is with the Gorons?_

Starlll: I just said that!!

_That's what I'm guessing. And TP Mudd, I hope you won't threaten me! That's why I'll be super nice to you! OKAY! cough...see yah later till the next chapter.  
_

Mudd: (Twilight Princess) You'd better be.

_  
Lost out! (I love this saying too much) _

Starlll: I wonder what Silicon is doing right now...

Meanwhile with Silicon...

At the toy store:

Silicon: Let's see... I need a friend for this trip. (Picks up a stuffed gorilla.) Hey look! If I buy this, than it saves a real gorilla in Africa! (moment of silence.) And if I don't than they kill one. Wow, these people are playing hardball. (Walks up to the cash register.) Um, excuse me, sir? (the clerk turns around.) I'd like to buy this, please.

Clerk: Excuse me, where is your mom?

Silicon: (Lying.) Um... in the car.

Clerk: And your father?

Silicon: At work. (He actually sort of is, considering I created him and I'm _working_ on this.)

Clerk: (Annoyed) Where do you live?

Silicon: I can't tell you that.

Clerk: (Angry.) Why not?!

Silicon: (Smiles.) Because you're a stranger.

Starlll: Oh! Can't trump that one!


	3. Zora: The Return of Clukko!

A/N

Starlll: (U)OLLIGG!!)())((()()()))

Mudd: (Twilight Princess) What?

Starlll: I made a picture!

Mudd: Of what?

Starlll: You don't see it?!  
Mudd: No....

Starlll: I can't believe you don't see the picture!!  
/

Disclaimer: I only own Mudd, Gale, and Clukko. Yes, BTM707, Clukko is back.

/

Note: Whenever I skipped a line, I put a dash because I think it will be one long list without breaks if I don't fill in the lines.

\

/

Mudd was laying against the ranch in Oradon. He had worked there for as long as he could remember. He was wondering what would happen if he was forced to chose a side to the war. The Zora had better tactics, but the Gorons had the muscle.

_Stop thinking about those things. You can't get wrapped up in that war. Think about how it would destroy your life... but what would happen if the troops came here? _His cold-as-granite side asked. _The day is going to come when you have choose your side! What will happen then?_

But Mudd knew that the troops would never come to a peaceful town like Oradon. He was the only one who knew how to use a sword- aside from Rusl, of course. Rusl taught Mudd how to use a sword, and the 17 year old turned out to be one of the best swordsmen in the country- which was good considering that he couldn't use a bow or knives for his life. (Oh, the irony.)

"I guess I would choose the Zora's side." Mudd said quietly.

"And I guess I would choose not to wait for you to look up and see me!" A green man (sorry folks, not Luigi) said, towering over Mudd.

"Link!" Link other person who taught Mudd the art of swordsmanship.

"You really need to be more alert. I could have killed you right there." Link smiled and Mudd realized he was joking.  
"Come on in, Link. It's been a while since you last stopped by." Mudd said to the 32 year old man.

Link entered the ranch and had a drink.

Mudd had just sat down when Link began to tell him of the reason why he came.

"Mudd... I need you to do something for me." He said.

"What?"

Link hesitated before responding. "Have you ever seen the country around Oradon before?"  
Mudd thought about it. "No, I haven't."  
Link's eyes trailed to the two black tarantula tattoos on Mudd's wrists.

"I need you to give this gift to the royal family in castle town." Link put a steel sword and shield on the wooden table. "Castle Town is about half-way across the country. Do you think that you can handle that?"

"Is there anything I can't handle?" Mudd asked smugly.

Link smiled knowingly. "You have no idea."

/

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ The next Day /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

\

Link was leaving Oradon after his short stay. The entire time, he was acting like he was hiding something important from Mudd.

"Bye Link, see you later."

Link smiled atop of his horse -named Epona- and waved goodbye.

"You'll find him in the Grudeo desert." He said, then ran off before explaining.

Generally, Mudd had no idea who Link was talking about or where the Grudeo desert was, and forgot what he said five minutes after he was told.

Mudd's horse, Gale, was waiting for him at the gates of Oradonia, pawing the ground.

"Calm down, girl." He whispered to the brown horse. "We'll leave soon."

Mudd checked everything he could think of in his supplies (food, water, weapons, etc.)

and loaded them on his back with surprising ease. Then he got onto Gale's back and kicked off. It will be a while before he ever got back to his home, and when he does get home, he won't be happy to see what it turned into.

/

\

The next night:

/

\

Mudd was on his back, laying down with his face to the dark midnight sky.

"It doesn't get much better than this." He said.

He closed his eyes and took his guitar out of his bag, then started playing.

/

\

/

\

/

\\\\\\\\\\ Three days later: ////////

/

\

Mudd was standing next to Gale, looking at his map for directions. He was halfway to Lake Hylia, which was two thirds away from Castle town.

_Let's see... I've traveled for three and a half days, I'm about halfway to two thirds there... that's one third there._

"I'll NEVER get there in time!"  
Then Gale started to bark like a savage dog, attempting to break out into full run. Gale would trample over the small figure ahead, if it weren't for Mudd pulling on the reigns.

"Hush, girl." He hissed. "It's just a cucco. No need to go crazy." He had only seen Gale so bloodthirsty once, and that was when a whole pack of hungry wolves were several yards away. "Just a cucco."

The cucco slowly waddled to the teenager and his horse. It was brown with ruffled feathers from the sudden surprise.

The most distinguishing feature, however would be the collar around it's neck (Where else would a collar be?). Cuccos weren't given collars because they were never worth enough for the trouble.

"Let's see who you belong to..." Mudd said as he inspected the metal charm, "Clukko... Well, I guess that's your name. Now who do you _belong_ to." He flipped it over. "This cucco belongs to whoever finds him."

There was a moment of silence as Mudd decided what to do with the strange cucco.

"Well, I guess you should come with us, then."

\

/

\

/

\

"Okay, where are we?" Mudd asked, annoyed.

They were in a small canyon, and boulders were stacked up on every side.

_I don't feel good about this._

Mudd barely finished his thought when a stack of rocks fell, narrowly missing him.

"Oh Goddesses." He said as another stack fell behind him.

Mudd was trapped in a canyon, a stack of boulders were stacked up by his side, and another pile was on it's jolly way.

"Holy-" Was the last thing he said before he blacked out.

\

/

\

Zora's Domain, four days later.

/

Mudd opened his eyes.

_Where am I?_ He thought. Then it hit him like a ton of bricks. The getting hit by a ton of boulders, that is.

"Are you awake?" A Zora asked.

"Yes. That's why my eyes are open, idiot."  
The Zora looked hurt.  
"I'm just worried for your sake. That's all. Those Boulders hit you pretty hard, you had to get your left and right legs amputated."

"Shut up and leave me alone." Mudd replied, not being able to think of a good comeback.

The Zora left the room and Mudd realized what he said.

_Amputated? Did they cut my legs off?!?!?_

Mudd instantly ripped a chord off his arm and fumbled through the sheets by his legs. Both his legs were there.

_I'm gonna kill that sick person._ He thought.

Then he heard a familiar _Cluck-cluck_.  
"Clukko?"

"I see you found your friend. He wouldn't leave you alone after the Gorons pushed those rocks on you."

"I told you to leave... wait, what do you mean 'the Gorons pushed those rocks on me?"

"Either I leave, or I tell you what I meant. Take your pick." The Zora said smugly.

"Fine. Stay and explain, or go. I don't care either way."

"I think you do. Anyway, you know about the Goron/ Zora war that's been going on lately, don't you? Well, of course you do. Anyway, the Gorons must have thought you were with us, and ambushed you."

There was a moment of silence.

"Why would they think I'm a Zora?" Mudd asked.

"Well, you do kind of have a similar bone structure as us. And besides, the Gorons are crazy. It's their fault that this entire war started."

"Where's my horse?" Mudd asked.

"We're keeping it in the stables, don't worry."  
There was another moment of silence.

"How old do you have to be to join this side of the war?" Mudd asked.

"You can join, if that's what you are hinting at."

Mudd gave a rare smile. "Fine, I accept."  
"Good. My name is Rutabaga, top level archer."

"My name is Mudd."

/

\

/

\

A/N

/

Starlll: I've got some good news for you all!  
Pearson: (Calmly) What? Never mind, I know.

Starlll: Sheesh. Just because you're my conscious doesn't mean that you can ruin my surprises. At any rate, in the review corner, We're making fun of someone else!

/

The Review Corner!

Starlll: This one was submitted by Jane O'Callaghan!!

/

_Oh, I want to be mocked in the review corner too! I will make the longest  
review ever, muhahahaha!_

_\_

Pearson: No you won't.

/

_So is Minda actually Midna under cover? She's so  
creative with names!_

_\_

Starlll: No, that's the way her name is spelt.

Midna: No, this is the way my name is spelt.

Starlll: How did you get in here?! This is for me, Silvanus (My Greek clone) and my O.C.'s!! _  
\_

_Aw, the stupid Younger died. How sad... And Hero does some wacky math, lol.  
It's weird that it actually worked..._

_/_

Hero: HEY!! I've been doing math like that my whole life! Haven't you read "Standard Hylian Arithmetic"?

Starlll: HEY! You aren't my O.C.! You belong to Nintendo64! (Actual person.)

Hero: I have to go, don't I?  
Starlll: Yeah! Hippies use back door! (Points to a glass window.) No exceptions!

Hero: Fine. (Breaks through a glass window and jumps out.)

\_  
Is Malon going to be in this one? Or at least mentioned... She is Mudd the  
second's mother after all!  
/_

Mudd: Wait, who's my mother?

Starlll: You'll have to find out for yourself.

Mudd: Tell me before I rip your arms off and feed them to you.

Starlll: (Looks left, then right.) NEVER!!! (Jumps out the glass window next to the one that Hero broke through.)

\_  
Okay, I'm out of things to talk about. I don't think it's the longest review  
ever, but oh well._

_/_

Pearson: Told you.

\_  
Oh, Silicon! You are so cute! Here, I made you a cookie! ^_^ _

_/_

Hero: Wait, that was for him? (Wipes crumbs off his face.)

Mudd: How did you get back in here?

Hero: Through the front door.

Mudd: A... door? EVERYBODY!! A WAY OUT!!

(Everyone but Hero runs out the door.)

Hero: I wonder what Silicon is doing right now...

/

\

/

Meanwhile, with Silicon:

\

Silicon: (Running through the hills with his stuffed gorilla) (Singing.)  
The hills are alive!  
With the sound of music!

Gorilla: (Singing) La-La-La-laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Silicon: (Record stops.) Say what? You can talk?  
Gorilla: Um... (Runs away screaming.)

Silicon: (Sad.) Now I have no one to travel with. Rats.

Owl: Hi there Silicon J. Lion! I'm Brian the owl, your conscience!

Silicon: You mean like Pearson?  
Brian the Owl: Yes, but I'm _your_ conscience! And I'm not as calm!  
Silicon: Will you ever run away from me screaming?  
Brian the Owl: Never! I'm like cheese all over your macaroni!

(Long moment of silence.)

Brian: So what are you doing?  
Silicon: Well, I've got some people to _take care _of LostWonder15, so now I'm going to her house to tell her.

Brian: Get some people to take care of her, huh? (Moment of silence.) You got the coupons?

Silicon: (Smiles devilishly.) Oh _yeah._

\

/

\

/

Dun-Dun-Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun!!!!!!!!!!!!


	4. Enter Uiod

Chapter 3-4:

Goron- Zora's side.

\

A/N

Starlll: (Listening to 'Boulevard of Broken Dreams' by Greenday.) I really love this song.

Chip: (The panicky cameraman.) Starlll! First you're obsessed with Holiday by Greenday, then Life on Mars by David Bowie, And now Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Greenday! What's next?! What's next, man!? (Lays on the floor pounding the ground with his fist.) What's...... Next?!

Starlll: I pay you why?  
Chip: (Gets off the ground) You pay me?

Starlll: On with the story!!

/

Disclaimer: = :remialcsiD

\

P.S. I don't own General Connors, he was sent to me from an anonymous review.

/

Zora:

\

"Y-your name is Mudd? With two 'D's?" Rutabaga asked Mudd.

"Yes... Why?"

Rutabaga didn't answer for a moment.

_Well... he _does_ look sort of like him... except for his hair. This guy's hair is longer and has more of a red tinge..._ Rutabaga thought.

"Who is your father?" He asked.

"I... I don't actually know. I was given to a rancher in Oradon when I was born, and he never told me." Mudd answered, confused.

"It's quite possible... though I don't think he was ever married..." Rutabaga muttered under his breath. It was too much for him to take in.

_If Mudd ever had a son... then there is a possibility that he........_

"Hey, stop daydreaming and listen to me," Mudd said. "Why do you care?"

" I care... because I might have known him."

Something happened to Mudd that only happened to him once since his eighth birthday: He couldn't speak.

"I know this might come as a bit of a surprise to you- Surprise?" Mudd interrupted. "No, surprise is when it's your birthday and everyone jumps out at you. This is dumbfounding!" Mudd yelled.

"I knew him. I was ten years old at the time, and I only knew him from his occasional visits to Zora's Domain, but I knew him."

Mudd sat up.

"Tell me about him."

"Okay, I don't know who your mother is, but..." And Rutabaga (His name sound familiar to anyone?) told Mudd the second about all of Mudd the first's adventures, and in quiet words, the final words he said, (check out his final words, because it gives off a few clues) and his death.

Rutabaga never told Mudd who actually killed his father, just that it was a Goron gangster who Mudd owed money too.

\

/

\

Gorons:

/

Hero sniffed his underarms and nearly puked. (Yeah Nintendo64, I just dissed your O.C.!)

"Hey, Midna," Hero said, leaning over his shadow.

A face emerged from his shadow and said "What is it?"

"I'm about to take a bath in the lake, so out." He said, pointing away with his thumb.

"Thanks for the warning." She said and few away.

/

\

Meanwhile with General Connors:

General Connors was... well, a general named Connors.

He was an unusually strong Goron- which meant he could lift 800 pound weights easily. He was in the hot springs when he noticed a strange figure slowly walking closer to Death Mountain.

"What the heck is that?" He silently asked.

Connors climbed down to the base of the volcano. He had a fairly hard time climbing down the loose rocks in the midnight sky. It would be impossible if the moon wasn't glowing so bright. There was one terrifying moment when his feet slipped and he was only supported by one arm, but he was fine after falling for a while.

The dark figure was dashing from one side of the canyon to another, trying to make no noise at all...

/

\

/

\

/

Mudd was dashing from one side of the canyon to another, trying to make no noise at all.

He rode Gale to Kakario village, but had to leave her there so he didn't make any noise.

Mudd had to sneak out of the hospital, break Gale and Clukko out of the stables, and ride away from Zora's Domain- all without being seen.

He had a good reason for this: He had to find a certain Goron. According to Rutabaga, this man could tell him more about his father.

The one thing that he still couldn't believe was that Link knew about Mudd's father the entire time. He said right to his face that he had no idea whatsoever who his father was.

Mudd mentally slapped himself as he tripped over a large rock.

_I have to stop being so carefree! But I just found that after seventeen years of waiting, I might finally know who my dad was... but if I keep drifting off into thought- like I am now! Pay attention!_

Just as he thought that, a giant Goron dropped down from the sky and in front of Mudd.

"You wanna play?" It asked.

The Goron was a giant. He had tattoos down his arms of snakes, and was bigger than Darbis himself!

Mudd was terrified out of his wits, but he didn't show it.

"You looking for a dance partner? Fine, let's go!"

Mudd took his sword out of it's scabbard and charged the massive Goron. General Connors (For of course it was him.) easily parried and feinted each attack and after several minutes, he switched to offense.

Connor rammed Mudd with his elbow, which he easily dodged. Connors punched the wall where Mudd's head was a fraction of a second ago.

_This guy's fast!_ Both thought at the same time.

Connor grabbed Mudd's face with the face that wasn't stuck in five layers of solid rock and slammed him into the mountain.

_Today just isn't my day._ Mudd thought as he fought to stay awake.

"Can I get another amen?" Connors asked, then stabbed Mudd in the face with a dagger.

Mudd turned his head a fraction of a second before he was stabbed, and felt a taste of metal on his tongue.

_Did he just stab through my cheek- OH DEAR GODESSES!!! _He thought as Conner pulled the dagger out, and Mudd passed out.

"Night-night." Conner said and nearly stabbed his heart out, if it weren't for the voice behind him.

"Are you truly going to kill a child?" It asked.

Connors jumped and dropped the dagger as he turned around.

Behind him was a man who had a white toga and light brown wings, like an angel. He had two curved knives in his hands. Connors could see a magnet in each knife, and also that if he stuck them together, the would make a strange type of bow.

"Put him down." The angel said, and brandished both knives.

\

/

Meanwhile, with Starlll:

Pearson: This shall be very entertaining.  
Mudd: (Wind waker.) My money's on the Goron!  
Starlll: Get me in on some of that action!

\

/

It took the angel two seconds to rip both of the weapons from Connor's hand and into the sky, and knocked him unconscious before they fell back to the ground.

"I love my work." The angel said. "Now look at you, Mudd. A hole right through your cheek. That side of your face will be paralyzed no matter what I do, but I can stop the blood flow." The angel waved three fingers over the wound and the wound sealed instantly.

"Good job." A voice behind him said.

"Hello Midna." He replied.

"Why are you here, K-" The angel clamped his hand over Midna's mouth before she said his name.

"Don't say my name on this world. The specters are watching."

"Well then what should I call you?"

"If you truly need to have a name for me on this planet, then you may call me Uiod."

"Uiod? What does that mean?"

"Uiod has no meaning before today. Now it is my name."  
"Okay, will you stop with the ancient slang?" Midna asked.

"Slang?" Uiod asked.

"You know what I mean. And you didn't answer my question: What are you doing here _Uiod_?"

"I am doing what I have been doing since Mudd's birth: Watching over him. Nothing more, nothing less."

"Seriously, I just asked you to stop talking like that."  
"Oh shut up."

/

\

/

A/N

\

Starlll: Hey. Sorry if this chapter was short, I just starting to run out of ideas, so I decided to end it like that.

Pearson: Yes, you will be guilty for how long it took you to post this chapter for two weeks.

Starlll: Two weeks?!  
Pearson: Three weeks.

Starlll: I hate this guy... For those of you who are wondering why I made Hero bathe lake, it's because I needed a reason for Midna to leave him for a moment so she could talk to Uiod.

Mudd: To the review corner!!  
The Review Corner!!!

This was submitted by Jane O' Callaghan:

\

_Yes! I was in the review corner! I feel so special :-D _

\

Starlll: You'll be feeling a lot better now.

/_  
Lol, Clukko is back! How old is that chicken anyway?_

\

Uiod: Old. Very very old.

/

_Hmm, I wonder what Link was talking about...  
_\

Starlll: I'd tell you, but spoilers to stories are like donuts to diets.

Mudd: What does that have to do with anything?

Starlll: I don't know, but a donut sure sounds good right now, don't it?

/_  
Great chapter, can't wait to see what's going to happen next! _

\

Starlll: Well, you just _did_ find out. I wonder what Silicon is doing right now...

/

\

/

Meanwhile with Silicon:

Silicon: (Walking through a dark alleyway.) Hey, Brian... Why are we in a dark alleyway?

Brian the Owl: I don't really know and- look! A mugger! (Flies away screaming.)  
Silicon: Wait!! Don't go! What happened to being cheese all over my macaroni!?

Mugger: Give me your money, punk!

Silicon: Hey! (Looks at the knife.) I have that same knife!

Mugger: Really? They went out of stock a decade ago!

Silicon: I know! They were so good, too!

Mugger: Yeah! A tough polymer base but a titanium- steel combo tip.

Silicon: They coasted a fortune, though.

Mugger: Yeah... My name is Larry, though my friends call me Stabby Larry.

Silicon: I'm Silicon!  
Stabby Larry: So what brings you all the way here?  
Silicon: Well you see, some girl stole my-

Stabby Larry: Money?

Silicon: No. She stole my-

Stabby Larry: I.D.?  
Silicon: No! She stole my moment, so I'm hiring some people to _take care of her_.

Stabby Larry: Will snipers be necessary? I'm good with tazer darts!

Silicon: Sure! If worst comes to worst, I'll need a good sniper with me!

Stabby Larry: YEAH MAN!!! I'm employed again!


	5. Goron's Side: General Search

A/N

Starlll: GREAT!! JUST PERFECT!!!

Mudd: What?

Starlll: I can't think of a pun for the author's notes!

\

/

Disclaimer: I forgot to put this here. This is just a mirage because you haven't eaten or drank in two days. What do you mean "You just ate"? You have been staring at this screen for two hours. Great, the next symptom: Memory loss!

\

/

Quote: At the sign of danger, give up all pride and make the best choice.

\

/

Hero was at a conference hall in Death Mountain.

"Hero, what happened to General Connors is a grave secret- so naturally, everyone knows." Cor Goron said.

"He hasn't been seen in two weeks, so we sent a search party. They couldn't find a trace." Darbus added.

"So we need you to try to find him."

Hero was dumbfounded. An _entire _search party couldn't find him, and they wanted _him_ to try?!

"B-but I'm horrible at-"  
"Hero." Cor Goron said calmly. "You are one of the best I have ever seen. You _can _do this. But you must understand... You _**HAVE**_ to find him. He is one of our best Generals."

"So in other words, don't come back if I don't find him?"  
"I'm glad you caught on." Darbus replied.

"But... one more thing." Hero added.

"What?"  
"While I'm away... should I go to the spirits and-"  
"NO!! We can win this war by _ourselves_ thank you very much." Darbus yelled.

"But we are losing more than winning. Open your eyes-"

"SHUT UP!!" Darbus yelled and threw Hero out the door. "You better find Connors FAST and I **might** forget your backtalk!!"

Hero waited three minutes for his ears to stop ringing and said:  
"I really hate it when Darbus yells." And then picked himself up and left for the mountains.

/

The next night:

\

"Do you really think you can find him?" Midna asked Hero. "An _entire_ search party failed and to be honest, you aren't the sharpest knife in the sushi drawer."

"Yes, but the search party wasn't part _wolf_." Hero said, and pointed to the moon, which would be full the next night.

"I didn't think of that." Midna said.

Then Midna disappeared into his shadow. She began to think of her conversation with Uiod the other day.

_Flashback!!!!!_

"_Oh shut up." Uiod said._

"_So this is him?" Midna asked, pointing to Mudd._

" _Yes. This is the boy."  
"But he's just a kid!" Midna said, disbelievingly._

"_He's half a year younger than you are." Uiod answered. "If you are calling _yourself_ an infant-"  
"Shut up." _

"_I am just pointing out the obvious."  
"Whatever."_

"_So where is that werewolf you were talking about?"_

"_Oh, him. He couldn't make it. Something to to with the lake."_

"_You made an extraordinarily long and difficult plan to get them to meet, and you could have just brought him here?" Uiod asked._

"_Shut up."  
"That phrase is being said often." Uiod said. "You should expand your vocabulary."_

"_Fine _Mom_."_

"_Don't call me that. It makes me feel old." The 10,000,000,000 year old angel replied._

_Midna laughed at his joke and looked at General Connor's sleeping body on the ground._

"_He doesn't have a scratch on him!" Midna exclaimed._

"_That way, he can't say someone attacked him."  
"But how is it possible to do so much damage- you used you healing gift on him, didn't you?"  
"That would explain the the twenty white scars on him." _

_Midna laughed again._

"_We really have to talk more often." She said. "See if- WAIT! Mudd's waking up! I gotta go!" And Midna flew off._

"_Well," Uiod said disdainfully. "Back to spying on you." And he flew off on his brown wings._

End of Flashback!!!!

\

The next night:

/

"Okay, Hero. Here it comes." Midna said as the full moon finally showed itself.

Hero felt the surge of power as he dropped down to his hands and knees.

Changing into a wolf is a relatively painless process- although your head starts ringing over and over again to let the wolf's instincts kick in.

Hero finally finished the transformation and howled as loudly as he could.

"Okay, Hero. Let me up." Midna said as she floated onto his back.

_Why don't you just fly? Wouldn't that be faster?_

"Well why don't you just run all the time? Wouldn't that be faster? Flying is exhausting!"

_Then why don't you just stay in my shadow? _

"If you had any idea how boring it is in there, you wouldn't say that."  
_ Do you know how tiring it is to carry someone when your back muscles are out of order?_

"You said that you would do anything I said, so shut up."

_I knew I was setting myself up._

\

----------------Two hours later --------------------- (The very same night) ----------------------

/

_I will never find General Connor's trail, it's to old and- hey look! A small trail of blood!_

Hero ran over and scented the blood, which was Connor's, without a doubt.

_But if Uiod cured him..._ Midna thought. _Then how did this get here?_

Hero smelled everywhere he could- epically the small bits of metal that broke off knives- and found the rest of the trail.

To Hero, finding the trail was as easy as reading a book, sometimes going in different directions or sometimes in one straight line.

Hero had a short attention span (Yeah Nintendo64, I dissed him again!) and didn't realize that anybody with two brain cells would have gone back to their base, and the trail went in the completely opposite direction. Also, the trail could have been from any random hiker, because he had nothing to compare the smell to.

When Hero first saw the man he was tracking, he realized every mistake he made and layed down on his forepaws.

Then, he got a strange sensation. He wanted a drink. He wanted blood. He wanted the blood of that 'innocent' man.

\

/

Mudd was slowly hiking through the mountains, using his sword's scabbard as a walking stick.

Then, he heard something. No, he didn't hear it, he sensed it.

The moment he turned around, a wolf vaulted up to him and jumped for his neck. Mudd instantly whipped out his sword and caught it's teeth with his blade.

The action caused the both of them to tumble over and roll down the mountain.

Mudd slowly stood up, and the wolf was gone.

He was at the edge of a cliff that went on so deep that he couldn't see the bottom. If he fell down there, then the fall wouldn't end very well.

Then he slowly turned around and saw the wolf jumping for him again.

"Oh-"

His sentence was cut off, and anything could have followed that 'oh', though it probably wasn't 'dearie me.'

This time Mudd wasn't ready and the two rolled to the very edge of the cliff. Mudd's head was over the edge, and his hands were pushing the wolf's hungry mouth away from his body.  
The wolf still had all four limbs and was trying to claw him apart.

\

Meanwhile, with Midna:

/

Midna had went into Hero's shadow when he began to run to Mudd, but then flew out

when the two rolled down the hill.

"What are you doing, Hero?" She asked. "You're going to kill him! Where's Uiod when you need him?"

Midna watched in horror as Hero relentlessly attacked the traveler.

"Looks like I have to do this by myself." She said, and held her hands about a foot apart. Then she shot out a green energy ball at the two.

Hero was blown away, but the traveler fell right off the cliff.

"For crying out loud..." Midna said, and flew down to try and catch him.

Midna caught his leg in midair and watched as he screamed in terror from the imp who was holding his leg.

"Trust me!" She called down. "This is much better than the alternative!"

"Than the alternative must be pretty bad!" He called back up.

"Shut up!"

\

Later:

/

Midna managed to keep Hero from ripping the boy to shreds- with difficulty. He passed out somewhere between getting pulled out of the trench and Midna yelling 'shut up'.

The sun broke out about an hour ago and Hero was himself again. Luckily without a lust for blood.

"You know, it's a bit ironic, really." Hero said as he sat down. The two were heading for Hylia, so they could just drop him off and walk away without being seen. "I left to find general Connors, but then I attacked this guy and now we have to drag him back to his base, which is our total enemy. While doing all this, we forgot about our mission in the first place."  
"Shut up, we have to hurry if we ever want to get there and back in time." Midna replied.

The two eventually left the man's body about a mile off from lake Hylia, and started back to Kakario.

They had to do many things on their way there, but I would rather not go over them all right now. I'm just going to skip to a scene where they are finally at Kakario and- hey! They're already there!

Hero was about a mile away from Kakario. He could have taken a more direct route than the one he had chosen, but this one had a stop he wanted to make.

"Are you sure you should do this?" Asked Midna as he approached the spring. "You remember what Darbus said about asking spirits for help."  
"You didn't say anything the last time I asked the spirit."

Hero made a trip to Oradon Springs to as the light spirit, Faron, for help.

"Well yes, but you didn't give me any chance. I still can't believe he agreed to help the Gorons."  
"Well," Hero said as he entered the middle of the springs. "Sometimes, you have to hope for the best and go with it." And Hero bellowed out to the light spirit Eldin.

"ELDIN! I, HERO OF THE GORONS REQUEST YOUR HELP!"

Eldin the light spirit seemed to come out of thin air at the request.

Eldin was a bird, and a giant one at that. It was a formation of light, with a blue- silver orb at it's feet.

"You require my assistance?" It asked.

"Yes. The general Connors is missing. I wish to know if you can show me where he is."

Eldin didn't answer, but instead the crystal orb at it's feet had a picture haze into existence. The was of Connors hiking through the mountains.

"Thank you for telling me where he is." Hero said. "I am in your debt."

"No you are not. I have to help my people."

"Thank you, Eldin. Thank you."

/

Back with Mudd:

\

Mudd woke up in a hospital.

Again.

"You really have to be more careful." A Zora who Mudd recognized as Rutabaga said. "Why did you break out of a hospital? You are lucky not to have passed out from the lack of blood earlier. You got so badly hurt that you barely have anything left inside of yourself."

Mudd brushed off the warnings like they didn't matter.

"How did I get here?" Mudd asked. The last thing he could remember was some strange imp grabbing his leg, but that was probably an illusion from the blood loss.

"You were knocked out about a mile away from lake Hylia. Any idea on how you got there?"

"No. I have no idea at all."

"Well, then considering you are not lying, than I'll leave you to sleep."

_And if he _is_ his son, than he is the biggest liar in Hyrule. _Rutabaga thought. _I'll let him sleep, either way._

"Good night, Rut." Mudd called over.

"Rut?"

"What? I don't feel like saying four syllables over and over again."

"Rut." He said fondly.

\

End of chapter! (Dun-dala-dun-da-duuuuuuuuuuuun!)

/

A/N:

Starlll: (Playing Mario Kart Wii.) Come on Toad! Just a bit further...

Mudd: Starlll, it's the author's notes.

Starlll: Come on, GO SPEED RACER!!

Mudd: Come on! It's the author's notes!

Starlll: GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! GO! I'M GOING TO WIN!!

Mudd: STARLLL!! THE AUTHOR'S NOTES!!!

Starlll: (Accidentally drops the Wii wheel in surprise and Toad stops moving and gets into 12th place.) Great! I have been trying to get first place on rainbow road _all_ _day_! But NO! You just had to mess up my perfect score!  
Mudd: Whatever. Come on, it's the review corner.

Starlll: Yay! This review is going to be from the person who read all of the chapters and sent one review. (Cheap!) Coincidentally, he is my best friend, Nintendo64!

Mudd: Isn't he going to guest star in the next chapter?  
Starlll: Great! You ruined my perfect score, then my surprise. What's next? What's next, man?

/

The Review Corner.

\

_Submitted by Nintendo64_

/

_How dare you diss my character. I outta kick your butt and Mudd's too._

\

Starlll: You aren't going to kick my backside! I have been practicing on Super Smash Bros. All day!

Mudd: I thought you were trying to get perfect on Rainbow Road all day.

Starlll: Shut up.

/

_I think Hero is cooler though and old Mudd was was cooler. _

\

Starlll: Look in the dictionary for a couple of synonyms for 'cooler'.

/

_Yes Mudd I knew your father. _

\

Mudd: Well doesn't everybody?!

/

_I hope Silicon's plan succeds._

\

Starlll: So do I.

/

_(yes this is spelt wrong so sue me..._

\

Starlll: Okay!

/

_no not literally) _

\

Starlll: Man!

/

_what plan you asked? Well there is a simple answer to that...walks away. _

\

Starlll: Hey! Walking away is my gimmick!

Mudd: Actually, that's Shipiddige's Gimmick.

Starlll: Hey! It's the best joke I could think of on the spot!

Mudd: I could do better.

Starlll: You want to write?  
Mudd: Okay. I'll write the next chapter.

Starlll: But.. what am I supposed to do?

Mudd: Take a vacation.

Starlll: I write on vacation!

Mudd: Write one of the of the other billion stories in your head.

Starlll: I wonder what Silicon is doing right now...

/

\

Meanwhile, with Silicon:

/

\

Silicon: Okay, Stabby Larry, how are we going to get to Lost Wonder's house?  
Stabby Larry: You didn't figure that out before you left?  
Silicon: Don't ask questions.

Stabby Larry: Fine.

Silicon: Wait- Let's stow away on this train!

Brian the Owl: But you will feel guilty-

Silicon: Whatever.

Stabby Larry: Burn!

/

On the train:

\

Silicon: Okay, we're in the train. (Opens the fridge next to him.) Look! Cake!

Stabby Larry: Get me in on some of that action!

Silicon: Wait! Someone is coming!  
Stabby: Hide!

Train guard: Okay, I think I heard some stowaways in here!

Silicon: (In a Scottish accent.) No stowaways in here!

Stabby: (in a French accent.) None at all!

Train Guard: Well, I have to trust the French. And the Scots, for that matter.


	6. Silicon's Adventure

_The chapter that has nothing whatsoever to do with The Goron/ Zora war._

_A.K.A. A large chunk of Silicon's adventure._

_Disclaimer: I own everything here except for the song "Soul with a Capital 'S'". I feel so powerful! I have no idea why it is all in italics. Enjoy. No, seriously, enjoy... or I will get you!_

_/_

_Silicon yawned as he woke op from his nap on the train._

"_Hey, Stabby Larry. Wake up!" He called over._

"_What?" The mugger asked in a daze._

"_How long have we been on his train for?"_

"_Do you see a watch on my wrist?! Honestly, kid." Stabby Larry said._

"_I think we have been hiding for about three hours." Brian the owl said._

_Silicon was giving Brian the silent treatment because he abandoned him when they thought Stabby Larry was going to attack them._

"_Did you hear something?"  
"Nope. Must'a been the wind." Stabby Larry replied._

"_Oh come on! I said I was sorry!"_

"_Wait!" Said Silicon. "Three hours?! We have to get off the train!"_

_The three worked their way out the window and off the roof. The couldn't just jump out the window because the wheels would suck them up and... basically kill them._

"_Where are we?" Asked Silicon. _

_All around them was a flat land filled with snow. An evergreen tree forest was to their right, and the rest of the train tracks were to their left. If you looked hard enough, then you could see the Blue- Grey moon through the clouds._

"_I think we're in Colorado." Stabby Larry said._

"_Let's see... we started in Massachusetts, and we're heading for Missouri... There's something wrong with this."_

"_We went too far." Brian said, annoyed._

"_So what way do we go?" Asked Stabby Larry._

"_East." Then, as he saw the annoyed looks, Brian said, "Right of our current position."_

"_Okay then. How far?"_

"_Very far."_

"_But we don't have anything to move in!"_

"_Luckily for us," Silicon cut in. "There's a helicopter rental place on top of that hill."_

"_Well, that's sure convenient." Stabby Larry said._

_The three climbed up the hill in the snow-_

"_Wait a moment! I can fly!" Brian said, and flew to the door._

_-and walked inside._

_It was warmer in the building then outside, but not by much. The walls were painted a tacky yellow color that was chipping off, and the ceiling was plain white. Spiders were making nests in the corners, but they weren't very big. There was one ticket booth, with only one man at the register._

"_No pets allowed!" He yelled, pointing to Brian._

"_A pet?! I am very offended!" Brian said, and flew out the door._

"_Umm... excuse me, Mr.?" Silicon asked._

"_What?"  
"I understand that for Helicopter rentals, you except cash, credit, and Song and Dance."_

"_Well... that was written a really long time ago, and I don't really like it-"_

"_Well, I might be able to change your mind." The eight year old said as he took out a cane and top hat. _

_Silicon: You might hate song and dance, _

_but find you like it, if you give it a cha-a-ance!_

_Now what kind of music to you sort of like, to lay the foundation? _

_Man: Well... I kinda like soul._

_Silicon: I like me some soul with a capital 'S'!_

_/_

_(The entire Tower of Power band burst through the door playing soul with a capital 'S'.)_

_Silicon: There's all kinds of __music__, everywhere you go  
Some folks like it fast, and some like it slow  
__Some like it hot__, some like it blue  
Uh some like it old, and some like it new  
Now I'm not liking country, and I'm not rappin' rap  
You can make a man swing, just say my thing  
No, I'm talkin' to dig, my step!_

_/  
Guy: The only thing that turns me on  
Is when I hear a soulful song_

Silicon: I like soul with a capital S  
Soul with a capital S  
Sweet _soul music__, that's the best  
Soul with a capital S_

_Music__ makes you happy, thinking makes you sad  
It can do the worst thing to the best you ever had  
For entertainment found you if you had to choose  
You and me might disagree, 'cause I like rythm and blues  
Now I'm not missin' disco, I'm not saying punk is bunk  
I can't settle for heavy metal, cause I got to have that funk_

_\  
I like soul with a capital S  
Soul with a capital S  
__Sweet __soul music__, that's the best  
Soul with a capital S_

Oh, there's people who tell you to get in with the times  
It doesn't even matter that if your poem rimes  
But I'm here to tell you, whatever comes along  
There's something that gave up everyone and there ain't no right or  
wrong

I like soul with a capital S  
Soul with a capital S  
Sweet soul music, that's the best  
Soul with a capital S

Some rock makes you lazy  
Highschool leaves you flat  
_Fusion__ drives you crazy  
That's now funk is where it's at_

I like soul with a capital S  
Soul with a capital S  
Sweet soul music, that's the best  
Soul with a capital S  
I like soul with a capital S  
Soul with a capital S  
Sweet soul music, that's the best  
Soul with a capital S

(solo)

I like soul with a capital S  
Soul with a capital S  
Sweet soul music, that's the best  
Soul with a capital S

Play that funky groove!!

_\_

_When Silicon finished, T.O.P. (Everybody who listens to them, speak now!) left and the shop owner asked:_

"_How old are you?"  
"Twenty-One." He lied. _

_He held out the helicopter keys. _

"_Have it back by Christmas." He said._

"_Thank you!"_

_Silicon left the building with __ Stabby Larry, and saw Brian waiting by the Helicopter._

"_Was that Tower of Power?" He asked. _

_Silicon ignored him and put the keys in the ignition. The fins started to spin and everyone else climbed in._

_Brian was piloting (despite the fact that he is an owl and has no hands.) because he... well, knew how to actually fly._

"_Be careful!" Silicon yelled. "The sky is the same color as the mountains!"_

"_What?!" Asked Brian over the roar of the engine. _

"_I said to be careful-" Then Silicon and Stabby Larry began screaming at the top of their lungs._

"_GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"_

_Brain responded calmly: "What the (Censored) HECK was that?!" _

"_We were just practicing our anomie scream when we crash!" Stabby Larry answered._

"_Oh. That is okay, then." _

_Then, because of Brian's lack of attention, He crashed into part of a mountain, and began to plummet down to the Earth below, screaming. Stabby Larry and Silicon were screaming the same way as they did two seconds before._

_The trio landed in the snow and Silicon said:_

"_Imagine the song we will have to sing to pay for this."_

"_Why are we not damaged by that fall?" Stabby Larry asked._

"_Don't question what the author wishes." Silicon said._

"_What author?" Brian asked._

"_You know, the author who is writing this chapter."  
"Are you telling me that our entire destinies are created by some kid who doesn't even know what he's doing?!"  
"Well... yeah."  
"STRIKE ME DOWN WITH LIGHTNING YOU DUMB IDIOT!!!" He yelled to the sky._

_Then the sky turned gray and began to rain._

"_If that is your wish..." It said._

"_No, that's not my wish! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"  
"You'd better be." The voice from the Heavens said._

_Stabby Larry and Brian worked on making an igloo to sleep in, and Silicon tried to make a fire._

_It was annoying to try to make a fire when the icy wind kept blowing it out._

"_Hey, Silicon! How is that fire coming along?" They would call over._

"_I'm almost done!" He would lie._

"_Come on, little fire." He crooned. "You can do it."_

_Then, the fire lit._

"_I have fire!" He yelled._

"_Good! Move it in the igloo!" Stabby Larry called back._

_Silicon carefully lit a stick and carried it inside the snow fort, they sealed it behind him so they wouldn't loose any heat. _

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

_The next morning, Silicon carefully woke Stabby Larry up and slapped Brian awake._

"_What was that for!?" Brian asked._

"_For being a jerk."_

_The three tunneled out of the igloo and looked around. _

"_Nothing but nothing." Stabby Larry said, staring out at the white expanse around them._

"_If you build it, they will come." Silicon replied._

"_A series of tubes." _

"_The Real America."_

"_What are you two talking about?" Brian asked the two._

_They both looked at him._

"_We don't know."_

"_Imbeciles."_

"_I am NOT a bim-bo cell!" Silicon yelled._

_Stabby Larry, Brian the Owl, and Silicon hiked up a hill and looked around. All they could see was a sign saying:_

_'LostWonder15's house that way --_)'


	7. Zora: Secrets

A/N (Which stands for Author's notes.)

\

Starlll: (Playing on Super Smash Bros. Brawl.) Come on Marth! You can do it!

Pearson: What are you doing?

Starlll: I have been practicing for eight hours- EIGHT HOURS- for the S.S.R.D.O.S.C.O.N.O.M.O.T.A.A.S.S.S.S.C.S.S.B.M.!

Pearson: What is the S.S.R.D. So on and so forth?

Starlll: You don't know? O.C.'S! GET HIM!! (O.C.'s throw him out the window.)

Mudd: Why did you throw him out the window?

Starlll: It is a shame not to know what it stands for! Pearson got off easy!

Mudd: What _does_ it stand for?  
Starlll: It stands for: Super- Smashy- Razzle- Dazzle- Old- school- co-op- No-op- master-of- the- alley- all-star -super-star- somewhat- crazy- Super- Smash- brothers- marathon!

Mudd: What?  
Starlll: My friend Nintendo64 is coming and we are going to have our yearly Super- Smashy- Razzle- Dazzle- Old- school- co-op- No-op- master-of- the- alley- all-star -super-star somewhat- crazy- Super- Smash- brothers- marathon tournament!

Mudd: Nintendo64... He's the guy with the afro, right?  
Starlll: Yeah. He also is the hardcore Gamer- Wait! Here he comes!

Nintendo64: (Bursts through the door, Singing.)

I just

Got on a bus and came to the town where dreams can come true  
It's gonna happen for me  
It could happen for you

Starlll: Who me?

Nintendo64: You can do anything if you try  
The most impossible dreams can come true  
If you believe it!  
This is my kinda town  
It's as clear as the nose on your face!  
This is the time!  
This is the place!  
This is the time!  
This must be the place!

Hollywood!  
Where the streets are paved with gold!  
Where the kitties never grow old!  
In Hollywood!  
Hollywood!  
Where the stars don't shine at night!  
They walk around in the broad daylight  
In Hollywood!

\  
Dig that face  
Ya ain't seen nothin' like it anyplace!  
It's right up on the movie screen  
If you know what I mean!  
Look at me  
I'm gonna be the guy to see!  
I'm goin' down in history  
Just watch me!

Hollywood!  
Where the streets are paved with gold!  
Where dreams can never grow old!  
Right here in Hollywo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-od!!  
\

Both: YEAH!!!

Starlll: (stops singing.) Wait... if we live in Massachusetts, then why were we singing about Hollywood?

/

Disclaimer: Holly- Wo-o-o-o-od! Yeah!

\

Chapter 6:

Zora's side:

Rutabaga:

/

Rutabaga groaned.

The war had been going on for eight months and getting bloodier every day.

Hylians would join in, not realizing what they were getting into, until it was too late. Every building you entered, every bar you went to, you would be asked "Are you a Goron or a Zora?". People who had been best friends would fight like they loathed each other and wanted to kill each other. Hyrule had changed from Heaven on Earth to the Devil's palace.

_We never wanted _this_ to happen! _He thought. _We just wanted to get our water back!_

Despite his thoughts, though, Rutabaga continued to reenlist to the Zora. He had uncanny aim with his bow, and had a small yet useful ability with knives.

He also had a secret third reason, but that third reason was the most important, but he wouldn't say it to even the King of all Hyrule- no matter the reason.

People have strange ideas on what his secret is. Some started rumors about it. Some Zora said that he wanted revenge on the Goron for killing his brother (lie, he doesn't have a brother).

Some said that he knew a traitor to the Zora and wanted to bring him in.

Whatever the reason, whatever the problem, he wouldn't tell anyone.

But that was his secret, and his secret to keep.

Rutabaga was thinking those exact thoughts as he walked through the hallway to Mudd's hospital bed.

"Hey, Mudd."

"Hey there Rut."

Mudd had been confined to his bed for two months, and was obviously starting to develop a slouch.

"So, you have any idea how much longer I'm going to be here for?" He asked.

"The doctors say about one more week. You enjoying my present?"  
Rutabaga had sent Mudd a pack of throwing knives, to keep his aim steady. He would have to ask someone to pull them out of the dart board for him, and they were usually surrounding the center of the dartboard. When Mudd _did _get a dead-on bullseye, the guard outside his room would see the bit of metal sticking out of the wall two inches away from his/ her face, and freak out.

"Yeah, it's really amusing me." Mudd said, thinking of the dozen times a guard ran in on the verge of panic.

"Me and the rest of troop 32 are going to go to make an ambush on the Goron's Hidden Valley base, so I won't be visiting for a week or so."

"Well, bring me back a souvenir, Rut." Mudd replied. He was getting more and more worried about Rutabaga without being able to watch his back on missions.

"Don't be worried, I'll be fine."

"Okay. Best of luck."

There was a moment of silence. Rutabaga was hiding something, Mudd could tell. He didn't want to ask what it was, because Rutabaga was deciding whether or not to tell him.

Rutabaga's mouth opened to speak.

"Mudd, you know how dangerous this mission is, right?"

"Yes, I do." The tone of the conversation changed from calm and joking to dead serious.

"Mudd... in case I don't make it out alive... there's something you should know about your father." Mudd was slightly startled by the change of subject. Rutabaga hadn't brought up Mudd the first since they first met. "You see... when he died, he said something-"  
It was at that moment that several guards burst into the room and grabbed Rutabaga.

"Come on slacker!" One said.

"We have to move fast if we want to reach The Hidden Village by nightfall!" The other bellowed.

"Wait!" Mudd yelled. "Tell me!"  
"I'm sorry, Mudd. I don't have the time."

"Come on." The guard repeated.

/

#$#$#$#$#$#$#$# Later, at the Hidden Village #$#$##$

\

"Okay, Rutabaga. You understand the plan?" One of the soldiers asked.

"Yes. Now get in position."

"Sir yes Sir!"  
"Don't yell. This is a _stealth_ mission."

Rutabaga dashed from bush to boulder, trying not to be seen. Then, he had to wait half an hour on a patch of (SHARP!) rocks.

"Are you ready?" Asked a soldier.

"Yes. I have a good lay of the landscape."

"Okay, then." The lookout said, then told him the exact spots where each of the explosives that they just put down.

Rutabaga smiled. "Let's do this, then."

He waited ten minutes for the ready signal to be passed on, and stepped away from the boulder that was covering him from the Goron patrol.

"Hey fatty!" He yelled.

"Who are you!?"

"The devil's top employer! Tell him I said hello."

And with that, he struck a match and lit a fire arrow, before shooting it at the Goron.

The Goron closed his eyes for a moment.

He felt no shooting pain. No lack of air. No pain whatsoever.

"MISSED!!" He yelled at the top of his lungs.

"I wasn't aiming for you!"

Then, a crate of dynamite two feet away from him was lit on fire.

"Holy-"

BOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The other Gorons ran out of their homes to see what happened, only to take arrows from archers hiding in the rocks.

The entire fight took about ten minutes, and there were no Zora dead- or even injured.

"Okay, Rutabaga. You know what to do now, right?"

"Yes. I have to blow the entire place up. We can't just walk away with the satisfaction that we beat them."

"Well... yeah. Pretty much." The soldier said, and left with the rest of the Zora. The path that they took was blocked by rocks that fell from the explosion, so they used their claw-shots to get out.

Rutabaga waited ten minutes and carefully lit the large crate of dynamite that they put down _away_ from the range of the other explosive.

Rutabaga looked at the route that the other Zora left through.

He quickly looked for his double Claw-shots- or Duelies, as he called them- but they were gone.

"Oh good Goddesses." He said remorsefully. "I dropped them."

He panicked and ran through the town to look at the lit dynamite.

"There are five minutes, left at most. Nayru help me."

Then he ran into a house. There was a couch, a radio (Who buys those? They aren't a wave of the future, people!) and an ice box.

Rutabaga ran to the ice box and read the label.

}Warning: Lead Sealed! Almost impossible to open from the inside!{

Rutabaga climbed inside.

/

\

Two weeks later:

/

\

Mudd was running through the halls.  
The doctors told him that Rutabaga finally woke up from his coma, and he could finally see him.

"You might not be happy with what happened!" The doctor yelled across the halls.

"I'll be happy if he is alive!" Mudd called back.

Mudd was wondering what Rut was going to say to him. That, added to the fact that he had was clinging to life for two weeks.

"Rut?!" He yelled as he ran into the room. Rutabaga had white bandages around the back of his head. "Dear Din, thank the Goddesses that you're alright! Don't you know not to climb into ice boxes? Those things are deathtraps!"

Rutabaga stared at him blankly and said:

"Can I ask you something?"  
"Yeah, anything!"

"Who the heck are you?"

/

\

/

A/N

Starlll: Come on Marth! Get the Smash Ball! GO! GO! GO! GO!  
Nintendo64: He got the smash ball!!

(On the Screen, Marth jumps up to hit Fox in the air and uses his final Smash, but misses and falls off screen.)  
Starlll: Oh COME on! I lost my last life!

Nintendo64: That just proves that I am the Smash Champion!

Starlll: Hey! That was only part one of the Super- Smashy- Razzle- Dazzle- Old- school- co-op- No-op- master-of- the- alley- all-star -super-star- somewhat- crazy- Super- Smash- brothers- marathon! I still have time to beat you!

Nintendo64: Who are you using? Pit?  
Starlll: Yes. Yes I am.

Nintendo64: Oh.

Mudd: Are either of you going to do the review Corner? Or ask what Silicon is doing?

Starlll: No. No I'm not.

Mudd: Fine. Than I will.

/

The Review Corner:

\

Submitted by BTM707:

/  
_Ah, poor Mudd. Ten bucks that he'll die in that hospital. _

\

Mudd: Hey! I got out of there! One yellow rupee, please!

_/_

_Hero's kinda not the smartest, is he? _

_\_

Mudd: Do you even have to ask?

Nintendo64: (Looks away from the Screen.) Hey! That's My O.C. You're talking about!

Starlll: (Pit knocks Olimar off the screen because Byr- I mean, Nintendo64 isn't looking.) I took out Olimar's last life- and he has an entire army of Pikmin on _his_ side!

Nintendo64: It's on! Clash of the Titans!

Starlll: Y-you mean...

Nintendo64: Yes.

DK: (On the screen.) Dedede. When we last met, you were clumsy. Apparently, you still are.

King Dedede: I'm gonna put the hurtin' on you Mr. Sir Doc. Prof. DK!

DK: You and what army?

King Dedede: The Waddle De! Belly Dance! (Uses his final smash.)  
DK: (Avoiding the Waddle De NO! Not the Belly Dance! That's just wrong, man!

/

_I mean I know YOU know he's not smart, because you keep  
dissing him and he's not even your O.C., but you know._

\

Mudd: Everyone knows he's an idiot except for Nintendo64.

/

_Ehehe, rainbow road, easily the best track there is. _

\

Starlll: Hey! I just got the game like, two days ago! And my best character has bad turning!

_/_

_And SSB is AWESOME! _

\

Starlll and Nintendo64: Yeah.... DIE IDIOT!!

/

_But i could so totally slaughter you at it... _

\

Starlll: You probably could, you probably could.

Nintendo64: (Gets another smash ball.) I have another Belly Dance!

DK: I'm going to be sick...

/

P.S. The next chapter will take a while to get up, because I have a school project, so... sorry.

P.S.S. On Christmas day (Or eve.) I am going to put up a special chapter, regardless.

P.S.S.S. That's all, folks!

P.S.S.S.S. Why did I add another one?

P.S.S.S.S.S. Well, as previously said:

P.S.S.S.S.S.S. That's all, folks!

P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. Who says that anymore?

P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. I'm going to crawl into an octopaw jar!

P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. Anyone who knows what an octopaw jar is gets a cookie!

P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. That cookie won't be free!

P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. The cookie will also be plastic!

P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. Happy early/ late/ right-On-Time holidays, everyone!

P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. This P.S. Chain is the longest I ever made!

P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. I wonder how long this will go on for!

P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. Nintendo64: Hi! When did you get here?

P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. Starlll: That's all for now!

P.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. Nintendo64: Really? Bye, then!


	8. Uiod: No Title

Chapter 7

Other:

Uiod:

\

Uiod was waiting for a chance to leave Mudd.

He had sworn on everything that he would protect Mudd. He would happily slit his neck if it meant saving him.

He swore that he would never leave Mudd, no matter what happened to himself. That he would protect him until his dieing breath.

Except for every other full moon, for three hours.

The three hours that he had that night would be one of the most crucial he might have.

"The irony of this situation is very unusual. I must protect Mudd by not letting him out of my sight- though the best way to protect him would be to leave him so I could complete my mission." Uiod thought out loud.

Mudd was a rising star in the Zora army. He was in line for a promotion. Mudd wanted to accept, but to do that would be to leave his only friend (But then again, he was his only friend sooo... yeah...) behind, with amnesia.

"The full moon is coming..."

A loud clock began to ring throughout the base.

GONG!!1

GONG!!2

GONG!!3

GONG!!4

GONG!!5

GONG!!6

GONG!!7

GONG!!8

GONG!!!9

"Let's go." Uiod said, slipping out of his ancient way of speaking. He opened a stained glass window and dived out like a diving board.

The brown wings coming out of his back were soaring through the black night sky.

If anyone saw the human-like figure gliding over the ink-black atmosphere, they would wonder whether they actually saw the person gliding over the air like a boat over clear water.

Uiod's path was castle town, followed by Death Mountain to talk to Midna.

He finally reached his destination at Castle Town..

Slowly creeping up to the small house in the main square, he flew to the top window and slid a knife out of his scabbard.

His two knives were the sharpest things existing. They were slightly smaller than a foot in length. They held a strange magic that could stick them together and change into a bow.

When in combat Uiod would hold one downward and one upward so he could change the weapons without losing a beat.

He carved a hole just big enough for him to fit through and squeezed inside.

Uiod literally flew down the flight of stairs without making a noise.

_The best robbery warning nowadays would quite possibly be old stairs, creaking the moment you put any weight on it whatsoever._ He thought.

Then he saw a man in a green night tunic.

Link wasn't wearing his usual cone-shaped hat, but really, why would you want a pointy hat stabbing you all night?

Uiod ran forward and tackled Link into the ground, putting a knife to his neck.

Note: In the following, Uiod is about to swear and curse a lot, but because I don't want another reason to make this T- rated, so I'm really toning down the swears. But remember, there is a lot more cursing and violence then I put in, I just don't want to scare the people too young to read this, and don't have an account yet. Sorry.

"WHAT THE (Censored) DO YOU KNOW ABOUT MUDD!?!" Uiod yelled.

"WHO THE (Censored) ARE YOU!?"

"DOES IT LOOK LIKE MY NAME MATTERS!? JUST (Censored) ANSWER MY QUESTION!!"

"I NEVER (Censored) HEARD OF ANYONE WITH A NAME NEARLY AS RIDICULOUS AS MUDD!!"

"IF YOU COOPERATE THEN THIS WILL BE SO MUCH EASIER, YOU KNOW!! I SAW THE TWO OF YOU TOGETHER AT LON-LON RANCH ONCE BEFORE!! AND YOU KNOW ALL ABOUT HIS CHILD!! SO JUST (Censored) (Censored) TELL ME!!!!"

Link thought for a moment.

He quickly tried to roll away from the knife but got slammed down into the hard floor again by Uiod.

Uiod dragged the half-conscience person up the stairs and held him out the window, two stories up.

"From one professional to another," Link said as he looked at the hard brick floor below him. "A fall from this high wouldn't kill me."

"I'm not counting on it." Uiod said, and let go of Link.

When Link hit the ground, his ankles and knees made a sickening snapping sound as they broke.

"WHAT ARE YOU?!! SOME SORT OF (Censored) ANGEL?!?!"

Uiod's tone was quieter. "If I am an angel, then I'm not from Heaven." Uiod's tone got louder. "I have a very short temper... SO (Censored)ING (Close one, there.) TELL ME WHAT YOU KNOW!!!!!"

"I... don't know anything about who you're talking about. NOW GET OUT OF HERE!!"

"If you don't tell me what you know... then I will hunt you down every chance I can possibly get, and beat the (Censored) out of you... until you tell me what you know."

"I don't know ANYTHING about Mudd the first." Link said. He would have gotten away with that lie, too.

"How did you know has a son, then?"  
"You said he had a son."

"That doesn't mean he's named after his father."

"Oh (Censored)."

Uiod dragged him back inside, and Link's screams of pain were just quiet enough not to distract anyone traveling by.

Note: Okay, the swearing scene is over now.

/

11:00 P.M Hyrule Standard time:

\

When Uiod got the information he needed, he beat Link unconscious (which wasn't very hard, considering what Link was just through.) and healed him in most of the bloody spots. Most of them.

Uiod closed his eyes remorsefully for what he had just done, but it was worth it for the information.

He ran to the top floor, and jumped out. He flew to Death Mountain.

/

Midna was out of Hero's shadow. She tended to leave when he was in wolf form because he complained a lot more. When he wasn't searching or blood, that is.

She was floating in midair with her hands behind her head.

She told Hero that flying in air was exhausting, but she didn't bother to tell him it was actually relaxing if you just stayed in one position.

Then, someone tapped the window.

"Uiod? What are you doing here?" Midna asked.

"What? I can't have a reason to visit my friend on my night off?"

"What are you doing here?" Midna asked again.

"I need to see the werewolf. Where is he?"

"He has a name, you know. It's Hero."

"Name or not, I need to know where he is. I have little left than half an hour left."

"You won't learn anything from him on your nights off: he'll just be a wolf and you won't understand him."

"Then Mudd will just have to come here during the day, won't he."

"Uiod... why are you guarding him?" Midna asked.

Uiod laughed and said "That, I can't tell you."

"You know, you're changing, Uiod. If you came here before the war, you would just leave the moment you found out you can't see Hero. But now you're laughing trying to get Mudd involved in you're plans. You are changing."

Uiod shrugged. "I blame you."

/

\

A/N

/

Starlll: Well, I can't really think of a pun for the author's notes, so I'm going to skip down to the review corner.

The Review Corner!!

_Submitted by Jane O' Callaghan:_

\

_Hey, sorry I haven't reviewed in a while..._

_/_

Mudd: Oh, so are we just supposed to forgive you? O.C.'s eat reviews! Some of us are going hungry!

Starlll: But... Aren't reviews made out of metal?

(Pearson bites into a giant metal review like it's a sandwich.)  
Starlll: That explains _so many_ things.

\

_I was having trouble with my computer :-( But now I'm back, yay!_

/

Everyone: HORAY!"

\

_Oh my gosh! Rutabaga's got amnesia!?_

/

Rutabaga: I do?! Why didn't anyone tell me!?

\

_That's so sad... I hope he gets his memories back at some point...  
/_

Starlll: No comment.

\_  
Hmm, I really want that not-free plastic cookie, but I have no idea what an octopaw jar is... _

_/_

Starlll: Does anybody?

\

_Oh well. You'll tell us later though, right? You can't leave us in suspense! _

/

Starlll: But I like people reviewing when they're in suspense! The reviews are so much longer!

Mudd: I wonder what Silicon is doing right now...

\

Meanwhile, with Silicon:

/

Stabby Larry: Kid, are you sure that LostWonder's house is that way?

Silicon: Do signs ever lie?

Stabby Larry: Yes... they do.

Silicon: Well, I don't care. I survived a mugger, a helicopter crash, being lost in an icy tundra, and a talking stuffed gorilla.

Stabby Larry: True. But listen to this story:

_A woman finds a genie lamp and gets three wishes._

_But the genie warned her: For every wish you make, your husband gets twice as much._

_So her first wish was for a mansion._

_'But remember, your husband will two mansions.'_

_'I don't care, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine.'_

_Can you see where I'm going with this? No you don't._

_'My second wish is for 1,000,000,000 dollars.'_

_'Your husband will get 2,000,000,000 dollars, but okay.'_

_The woman thought for a moment._

_'I wish I was beaten half to death.'_

Stabby Larry: And the moral is: If your wife finds a genie lamp, get out of there before she makes her third wish.

Silicon: Okay.....


	9. The Ultimate Fight

Author's Notes:

Starlll: (checking his e-mails.) Ooh, I have Spam mail! (Opens his Spam mail.)

Mudd: You read you Spam mail?

Starlll: I am very bored a 7:00 at night.

Mudd: You know, the author's notes are on.

Starlll: Yeah, Yeah, yeah.

Mudd: (Reads through the previous chapter.) Star, you copied a scene off of Batman: The Dark Knight.

Starlll: MY NAME IS STAR_III_!! Not Star!! And I deny everything about Batman: The Dark Knight.

Mudd: For crying out loud! The scene with Uiod pushing Link out the widow! You even copied the 'From One professional to another'!

Starlll: I still deny everything.

\

Disclaimer: The Muffin Man is after you... THE MUFFIN MAN!!

/

The Chapter that's number escapes me.

\

It is finally happening.

One of the Greatest battles in history.

Mudd Vs. Hero.

/

"Hero, we need your help again." Cor Goron said. Again. "I am sure you heard of The newly appointed General Mudd of the Zora army." Of course he had. Every one had. "We need you to do something for us... we need you to find and kill him."

Hero was stunned. He was never on an assassin mission before, especially not one against a general.

"Bu-But don't really think I can- Don't give me that!" Darbus interrupted. "You took out 75 odd guards, and came back with a couple of scars and a burn of two! You found a General when no one else could! If you honestly think that I will let you not do this, then I swear-"

"Darbus," Cor Goron said. "There is no need to get hasty. Perhaps we should explain the circumstances with him. It might sound like a stealth mission, but we negotiated a deal with the Zora: our second best swordsmen -you and Mudd- will have a duel to the death. The loosing side will give up four bases to the winning team. Four bases will give us such an upper hand, that _anything _would be worth the risk. The fight will take place in a rich man's house in Kakario village. We are paying him a large some of money to do this, but he obviously wants to see the entertainment, so we haggled the price down lower. You may use anything inside of the house. The two restrictions are:

No leaving the house until you opponent is dead.

No using any weapons aside from a sword and a shield.

Do you understand?" Cor Goron asked.

Hero took a moment to take in all of the information.

"Yeah, I got it." He said casually. If he only knew what chaos laid in store for him.

\

Meanwhile, with Mudd:

/

"So do you understand?" Prince Rails asked.

"Yes, I think I do. Just one thing: What if the host wants the other side to win the fight? Then couldn't he lay a trap for me?" Mudd asked.

"We have several dozen other spectators who will probably show up to make bets. They can be good witnesses."

"Okay, then."

Uiod was watching from the corner, and he closed his eyes.

Uiod had an amazing ability to turn invisible for weeks at a time, without resting. He also could dematerialize and his body would be like a ghost's, if you tried to touch one, then your hand wouldn't feel anything. Even if someone did touch the space he was in, they would just feel the air that was inside of him.

He had a dagger through his heart on more than a few occasions.

_Now I have to make sure that no one can watch their fight, so I can talk to the werewolf in peace._

\

Three days later, at the mansion:

/

Hero entered the building with high hopes, only to have them crushed immediately.

His opponent was already there on top of a balcony looking over him and ready to fight. Hero had hoped he could get a good layout of the house.

"Don't worry, they wouldn't let me look at the layout either." Mudd said.

Mudd wasn't exactly what Hero expected. He had one small shield and thin armor. His hands weren't covered by gauntlets, though. Just gloves and leather covering his hands and wrists. Half of his face wasn't moving, probably because of the long scar across his cheek. All in all, Mudd looked pretty sure of himself.

There were no spectators, not even the rich man who presumably owned the place.

"So, I guess we start now?" Asked Hero.

To answer his question, Mudd jumped off the balcony and struck at him with a three-foot-long word. Wait, I mean sword. Sorry. This isn't scrabble.

Metal bit metal and sparks flew into eyes.

The two were in a fight for their lives.

Mudd was faster and didn't have the burden of ten pounds of armor, so he could duck and sidestep without using his shield much.

Hero was twirling his sword like a baton, spinning rapidly, connecting, and spinning the other way, connecting, spinning the other way, and connecting, over and over again.

"You're pretty good." Mudd said, rolling out of the way.

"You to too."

Mudd dived behind Hero and slashed at his back, doing almost as much damage as Hero had throughout the entire battle.

The battle dragged on.

Sword fighting was usually very short and dull. The image most people have are the effects of commercializing and boredom.

This fight was something else altogether.

Hero slashed at Mudd's head and he dived down, slashing at his feet.

Hero jumped and was still turning in midair, like a professional ice-skater, just with more bulk and falling flat in his back on the way down.

Mudd would have been crushed flat by the large (and I mean HUGE) person, but he rolled away, accidentally leaving his sword to snap in half.

Landing on a sword hurt like... well, landing on a sword. Even if you were in full armor.

Hero saw Mudd without a weapon and smiled wolfishly.

"Holy Din." Mudd said.

Hero lunged at him and slapped his blade into Mudd as many times as he could.

Then, one time, Hero's sword shattered upon impact.

Mudd's sword broke into billions of little pieces and only the handle was left.

Hero's sword still had about one foot left of the tip.

Both looked at each other for a moment of eerie silence and then they scrambled for the tip of the sword.

Hero got to it first and tackled Mudd into the ground.

Hero was trying to push the sliver of metal down into Mudd's neck, where the helmet and body-plate separated, but Mudd was trying to push the other man's hands back up away from his bare skin.

Mudd then realized that he had no way out.

On ground he had a chance because he was faster, but now it came to brute strength, and Hero was the obvious victor.

_I'm going to die._ He thought as he held back tears. _He is going to kill me here and now. It was fun while it lasted, I guess._

Now before you yell "WHAT THE #*# THIS IS CALLED 'HIS NAME IS _MUDD' _NOT 'HIS NAME IS HERO'!!", I want you to know... you know what? Keep reading, You'll find out.

"Goodbye." Hero said as the iron touched bare skin.

CRACK!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!

An arrow whizzed right past the two inches between Hero and Mudd's faces.

Uiod was standing in the doorway.

"Werewolf- Let go of the metal and get against the wall. Mudd, throw me the knife.

The two cautiously did as the strange figure instructed.

Uiod broke the bow in half and it became his usual two knives.

Keep in mind that neither of the two had ever seen anything like the angel standing before them and I couldn't even begin to tell you what was going through there heads.

Hero was against one side of the room and Mudd was against the wall on the other side.

They stayed like that for over an hour, then Mudd asked:

"Excuse me... but what the heck are you?!"

Uiod took a moment before answering.

" Can't tell you _what_ I am, but I believe that _she_ knows what my name is." And he pointed to Hero's shadow.

Midna flew out of Hero's shadow.

\

/

A/N

\

/

Starlll: What? You expected more? What's wrong with you?!

Mudd: Time for the review corner.

Starlll: Oh, yeah. Today, we're doing something different. We are going to do every review we got from last chapter... and one from the chapter before that.

Mudd: Let's go!

The Review Corner!!

_Submitted by Onigirl9797_

\

_Yeesh. That whole:  
"When Link hit the ground, his ankles and knees made a sickening snapping sound as they broke." think made my ankles hurt!_

/

Starlll: Is that good or bad?

\

_Dang I still can't get my ankles to stop that grinding- crazy feeling in them . . . !_

/

Starlll: JUST SEND ME THE LAWSUIT AND STOP HURTING MY ANKLES!!

\

_Poor Link . . . and to think - after that he got the (censored) beat out of him! (XD I just had to do the whole censor thing!) _

/

Mudd: Yeah, it's really (censored) fun, isn't it?

\

_Nice chapter - the who cursing scene was awesomely hilarious! _

/

Starlll: I know, I try.

\

_Write more - and sorry it took me so long to leave a review!_

/

Mudd: As said before, we eat reviews. The longer the better. And if you add parts involving food and wine-

Starlll: Shut up.

\

~_Onigirl9797_

_/_

Starlll: Onto the next one by BTM707!

\

_Ya, I knew where that story was going. _

/

Hero: Everyone does.

\

_Uiod is a bit creepy and, well, dark. He's mean. But... a good chapter. Does this mean that Mudd and Hero are finally going to meet (besides that one time when Mudd was almost eaten)?_

_/_

Uiod: Yes, it does. I hate it when we explain things that were just explained.

\

_And does Mudd care that I gypped him 5 rupees from like a month ago? _

/

Mudd: I got over it. I can barely even remember how much you gypped from me. Oh, and by the way, it was ten rupees.

\

Starlll: To the next one!

/

_...Huh. Silicon is 8, right? That's a rather intelligent kid._

\

Starlll: I know.

/

_Stabby Larry is kind of creepy, and Brian the Owl reminds me of Kaepora Gaebora. Except that no one likes him. _

\

Starlll: You know, I don't like either of them. And how do people know Kaepora Gae- whatever's name? Honestly, I never heard it in the game.

Mudd: Okay, now for our final review.

Starlll: Oh yeah! My friend Nintendo64 sent me this one.

Mudd: (Look's at the review.) I can't understand this.

Starlll: I'll translate.

_/_

_Your stories are graet they are however have you ever thought of making a story outside the Zelda department_

\

Starlll: (translating) 'Your stories are great, but have you ever thought of making a story that is not in the Zelda section?'

Mudd: Hey! I wouldn't be here if he wasn't writing Zelda stories.

/

_...speaking of which I making 2 new stories in a while one you might understand the other not so much_

\

Starlll: (translating.) 'I am making two stories, but you might not understand one.'

Mudd: He could understand anything if he can understand you.

/

_...GORONS FOR THE WIN! WOOT WOOT! _

\

Starlll: Do you need that translated?

Mudd: No... (annoyed.) I'm gonna kill that guy.

Starlll: Oh, and by the way, If you want your fan character in here like I did with General Connors, just give me the information I put about Mudd and Hero in the beginning. I meant to say this a while ago.

P.S. Please vote in the poll!

Who should win in the war:

Zora

Gorons.


	10. Arguements

A/N

Starlll: Sorry if this chapter was short. Onto the short chapter!

Mudd: Wait, that's it?

Starlll: Well... yeah.

Mudd: I thought you had something big planned for this author's notes!

Starlll: I considered that I should start calling this the 'Writer's Block', but I decided that was a bad idea. And to those of you who call me just 'Star', the three 'l's are there because my name is 'Star the Third', but it's pronounced 'Star-three'. You see, I come from a trade family of intergalactic bounty hunters-

Mudd: Wait, was Starlll the guy who you based off of Star Wars?

Starlll: I made Starlll a very long time ago-

Mudd: In a galaxy far-Far away?

Starlll: Shut up.

/

Chapter number I lost track: Yelling, arguing, and explanations.

\

The moment Midna flew out of Hero's shadow, the house started to shake.

It started with a cup full of liquid that was vibrating, then the entire table. Soon there was a rumbling noise.

Everyone looked at the door, which Uiod had apparently propped closed with a chair earlier.

To say that the door shattered would be inaccurate. To say that the door exploded into a million pieces, the splinters of half a foot of solid wood flying every which way would be closer to what happened.

Link stepped through the door, and there was a moment of silence as everyone saw each other.

"Midna?" (Link)

"Uiod?" (Midna)

"Mudd?" (Link)

"Link?!" (Mudd)

"Midna?" (Uiod)

"Angel person who broke into my house in the middle of the night and beat me into a bloody pulp and cursed a lot as he asked me questions?!" (Link. Duh.)

"Link?!" (Midna)  
"Hero- no wait, that's me." Hero said as everyone saw each other. "Will someone tell me what's going on?"

Link started yelling.

"This guy broke into my house and beat me into the ground!"

"Hey! I needed to know about Mudd the first! You could have just cooperated!"

"And what?! Give you information that I swore not to tell anyone?!"

"Hey! You knew that I wouldn't leave until I found out about him! And that's not the reason you're here, is it?" Uiod asked.

"You know what?! It's none of your business!"

"Will you two SHUTUP!?!" Asked Midna.

They both turned their heads at the same time:

"Stay out of it, Midna!"

"Wait!" Yelled Mudd. "Link, you knew my father?!"

"Yes... I did. I have a reason for not telling you, though!"

"A good reason?! According to the farmer who raised me, I was put in a basket and dropped at his doorstep like one of those corny movies!!"

While the three men argued, Hero and Midna were leaning against the wall.

"So, I think I figured it out:" Hero said. "That angel and Link are dying to kill each other, Mudd is dying to get an answer from Link (which he won't give), and you and I are just dying."

"That's probably it in a nutshell." Midna replied. She had a hard time looking away from Mudd. There was just something about him...

The arguing, screaming, and chairs breaking had gone on for hours. Eventually, Hero yelled:

"SHUT UP!! WHAT CAN YOU POSSIBLY STILL BE ARGUING ABOUT?!"

Everyone looked at Hero.

"Will you to stop arguing? I-" Hero stopped talking the moment he got a massive headache. "Oh Holy Din."  
Midna knew what was coming the moment he dropped down on four legs.

"HE'S CHANGING INTO A WOLF!! GET OUT!!" She yelled.

Both Link and Mudd did as he instructed, but Uiod stayed inside, trying to hold the wolf back.

/

Mudd was chasing after Link.

"Get back here you son of a-"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence!" Link yelled back.

Link hoped onto Epona. Epona had aged much since her time with Arrow. The two had a foal together, and Link named the girl Gale. Yea, bet you didn't see that coming.

Epona was running at full speed, slowly getting out of sight from Gale and Mudd.

"LINK!! I SWEAR, I WILL FIND YOU AND MAKE YOU TELL ME WHO MY FATHER WAS!!" Mudd screamed. "I'LL FIND YOU!!"

\

Because it was the second full moon, Uiod had three hours off.

Hero was doing pretty well, considering that he had a death grip on the angel, seconds away from ripping his neck out.

"NO!! UIOD!!" Midna screamed, tackling Hero away, hoping that she would prevent Uiod from losing his throat.

She almost did, too.

Seeing blood spew everywhere, she kept slamming into Hero, locking him into a closet.

"UIOD!!" She flew back to the angel that was like her brother.

Uiod was holding where his throat was two minutes ago.

The 500,000 year old angel slowly closed his eyes.

"NO!! UIOD!! STAY WITH ME!!" Midna yelled as she rapidly slapped him across the face. "STAY WITH ME! Stay with me! … don't leave me, Uiod."

"Uh, Midna, will you stop slapping me?" Uiod asked, opening both his eyes.

"Kolak-" Uiod took his hands over his throat, which didn't have any damage on it, and clamped both of his hands over Midna's mouth.

"I told you not to say my real name."

"But... your neck... ripped out..." Midna stuttered.

Uiod stood up.

"I haven't had to heal myself that much in a long time."  
Midna slapped Uiod again.

"I love you, Uiod." It wasn't a romantic kind of love, but a family type of love. "If you died, I don't know what I'd do without you."  
Uiod smiled.

"I love you too, Sis."

And with that, Uiod jumped out of the nearest window and flew away, leaving Midna to find the man who owned the house and the other people who wanted to watch the fight locked in the closet.

/

\

Author's notes:

Mudd: Good chapter, if I do say so myself. A bit short, but still good.

Uiod: Say, where's Starlll?  
Mudd: (Points at the ceiling.) Up there.  
Uiod: What the heck?! (Starlll's legs are dangling from the ceiling.) Do I even want to know?  
Mudd: No, you don't.

(Uiod goes to the second floor, Starlll is wearing a copy of Majora's Mask.)

Uiod: So you can't get out?  
Starlll: No.

Uiod: Why are you always wearing masks? They aren't mysterious.

Starlll: (shrugs.) I dunno.

Uiod: Well, I might as well find out what's behind that tacky fake Majora's mask. (reaches for the mask, but a red hand swats it away.)

Starlll: This isn't a fake, this is the actual Majora's Mask. (Arms and legs sprout from the mask.)

Uiod: Okay...

/

The review Corner!!

_Submitted by BTM707. The only person who reviewed last chapter!!_

\

_Man, that was intense!_

/

Starlll: You should have seen how long it took for me to write it.

\

_So it was a tie then, or what? Man, how'd I not see that one coming. *rolls eyes* _

/

Mudd: Hey! I would have won!

Hero: Oh, yea? When? After I stabbed through your neck?  
Mudd: Coming from the 800 pounds of fat!  
Hero: SCALY ZORA!!

Mudd: Blubber-butt!

Hero: IDIOT!

Mudd: STUPID!!

Hero: FISH!!

Mudd: FATTY!

\

_And Mudd, I know I owed you 10 rupees, but I paid you 5 at one point._

_/_

Mudd: What?  
Starlll: Oh... uh, yea. Here. (hands Mudd a blue rupee.)

\

_Mainly because I didn't have the other 5. But I do now, so here. *hands Mudd another blue rupee* _

_/_

Mudd: Yes! I'm going to buy a cucco dinner!

Starlll: Loan-shark.

\

_There, my debt is paid._

_/_

Starlll: Not much to say about that.

\

_And Nintendo64 is wrong!_

/

Starlll: Nintendo64 is always wrong.

\

_Zoras are the best, and they'll win this war! ZORAS!! ZORAS!! ZORAS!!_

/

Zora army: YES!! A NEW RECRUIT!

Starlll: Actually, I think he was just-

Zora army: To the new recruit's house!

Starlll: Sorry if you get drafted, BTM.

\

_Wow, this got pretty long. But you like that, right?_

/

Mudd: Yes. As said twice before, we eat reviews. They taste really good if you mention some food. Maybe some wine, or cheese-

Starlll: Shut up, Mudd.

\

_Oh, and I might update PH on the weekend. _

/

Starlll: He did.


	11. Zora: Castle Siege

A/N:

Starlll: (reading the Sunday funnies in the paper) (laughing.) Leave it to Beetle Baily to make a guy think he was a new general! (doorbell rings.) Who could that be? (Sticks his head out the window.) Hey, you! Did you just ring the doorbell?!

Guy who rang the doorbell: Yes.

Starlll: Can't you read!? The sign says to knock!!

GWRTD: What sign?  
Starlll: That sign! It's as clear as the mask on my face!

GWRTD: (Points to the bare wall.) There isn't a sign up there.

Starlll: What- oh. (Puts a sign up.)

GWRTD: (reading out loud.) Doorbell out of order. Please knock. Isn't that from the Wizard of Oz? (Knocks on the door.)

Starlll: (Sticks his head out the window again.) No one is allowed in!

Guy who knocked on the door and rang the doorbell: But I'm a cameo on this chapter!  
Starlll: Well why didn't you say so? Hey, BTM!

BTM: Hey.

Starlll: (Opens the door) You come here all the way from Canada?

BTM: Yeah. Why did you say that the door bell doesn't work, by the way?

Starlll: Long story, don't feel like telling it.

(The two walk down the hallway, BTM slightly taller than Starlll.)

Starlll: I'll show you around. Come on.

/

Chapter 10:

New Generals,

New friends,

New Cameos,

New events that lead up to life-changing plot twists (yeah, one of them is coming up.),

New beginnings.

\

Ruto would have been a queen, but her younger brother, Rails, got the crown instead. That didn't stop her, however, from ruling a Zora colony right by the Daen-Hyrule border.

Ruto was sitting on the throne when she found out.

Zulu, the guy who stood by the _queen_ like a guard, but didn't really do much, was reading the current events to Ruto.

"And the last event you should be aware of-"

"Zulu, will you stop being so proper? It's just us here, you know."

You might have guessed, Zulu and Ruto were dating.

"Sorry. Anyhow, the last thing you should know about is something King Rails sent in a private letter himself." That got Ruto's attention. Rails wanted her to know something- and they hadn't talked in months- years even. "I don't know why it's so important, but a Zora/Soldier in the war lost his memory. Every little detail is gone. That isn't common, but I don't know why it's so significant that he'd want you to know-"

Zulu had lost Ruto the moment she found out Rails wanted her to know someone lost their memory. He swore he wouldn't talk to her unless...

"What was his name?" Ruto asked.

"Excuse me?"

"The man who lost his memory. What was his name?"  
"Sorry, give me a moment. The name wasn't mentioned very much-"  
"Why didn't I even get this letter?!"  
"I'm sorry, something to do with unimportance-"

"Just tell me what his name was!!" Ruto shrieked.

"I'm sorry! It was a vegetable or something- very unusual because most Zora have a 'Z' as the first letter in their name-"

"Rutabaga..." Ruto whispered.

"Yes! That was it."

"Tell the guards that I'm leaving for a while. I'm heading for Hyrule."  
"I'll get the travel plans set up. Horses and whatnot."

"Not enough time. I'm going alone."

Zulu watched as Ruto, the queen of the Daen Zora, dived over a waterfall.

He didn't know that she wouldn't stop swimming for two days. Then, after eating a meal consisting of two fish, continue to swim. This time, she wouldn't stop again.

The entire time, she was thinking to herself something that three people- and three people only- knew:

_You'll find him in the Grudeo Desert. You'll find him in the Grudeo Desert._

/

\

It was two months after everything broke loose at the rich man's house. Hero and Mudd both made up a story on what happened, deciding to keep the true events to themselves.

The new Zora General went to his newly appointed base.

The man was fairly good at fighting, though his true talent was in planning out battles as a strategical advisor. Or something like that, I really have no clue.

"Mudd, this is General BTM." Rails introduced. "BTM, General Mudd."

The two shook hands.

"BTM, would you mind doing something for me?" Rails asked. Then BTM nodded and walked across the halls, doing as Rails instructed.

"BTW?" Mudd asked Rails, not exactly hearing the man's name.

"No. BTM."

"I never heard a name like that before."  
"Well, maybe he's foreign."

"Or it could be his code name."

"Probably."

"Are you sure it's not BTW?" Mudd asked.

"No. His name is BTM."  
"What's his name?"  
"His name is BTM!" Rails yelled.

"Yes?" BTM called over.

"Excuse me?"  
"You just called my name."

"What?... Oh... never mind."

"Wipe that grin off your face." Rails said to Mudd as BTM walked away.

/

"Okay, here's the plan." BTM said, spreading a map across the table. Surrounding the map was Mudd, Rutabaga, and about twelve others. BTM explained how they were going to surprise assault the Gorons, steal a majority of their supplies, and turn the base into their own.

\

One day later, midnight:

/

Mudd was behind a large statue, staying out of sight from the guards. Rutabaga was about twelve meters away, climbing the side of the base's wall.

BTM was already inside, working his way to the gates.

The twelve other soldiers (the disposables, as I call them) were hiding in trees, waiting for BTM's signal. Some had bows aimed at guards, while the smarter ones were just getting ready to make the 2-mile dash into the base.

Mudd quietly stabbed a guard with his sword, stole all of his armor, than hid the body behind the statue. Wearing the entire suite of armor, Mudd was unrecognizable, walking down the halls freely.

It wasn't long before he found a drunken guard with keys to the prison cells. Mudd's sole mission was to find more Zora and reequip them.

Meanwhile, a certain Goron saw Mudd stab the man, and steal the keys. Instantly understanding the plan, General Connors headed for the prison room.

\

BTM entered the Gateway, to find eight Gorons staring at him.

"This is going to hurt." He said as the Gorons charged at him.

/

Rutabaga was still climbing the high wall while this was happening.

He scaled the wall, thinking,_ 4 before 3_. This meant that he needed four hands and feet in a firm location before he could hold onto the wall with three.

As Rutabaga worked up the wall, images would form in his head. Nothing that made sense, but they had an odd familiarity to them.

Queen Zelda as a teenager, with rope around her neck- in a desert. A bow pointed at a lone Grudeo. A man who looked somewhat like Mudd, but with a large bow over his shoulder, that sort of thing.

Then, he remembered something about his past. It wouldn't seem like much, but not only did he remember a flashback- he realized something insane.

"Holy (censored)." And Rutabaga fell off the wall.

\

Mudd was in the prison room. He unlocked the first door, and two thieves that the Gorons caught were inside.

"Don't even bother getting up: you're not who I'm looking for." Mudd said as the two stood up.

"Wait-" Mudd shut the door.

The second and third cells went in the same way. The fourth jail cell contained a Goron who Mudd was all too familiar with.

General Connors rammed into Mudd and said, "You and me have some unfinished business to take care of!"

Adrenalin possessed the 17 year-old flying through the air. Mudd flipped over in midair and landed on his feet.

Mudd's weapon flew into his hand and he ran at Connors. When the Goron jabbed his sword at him, Mudd jumped onto the sword and did a front-flip of of it, slashing Connors in the face- cutting right to the bone.

Connors swore loudly and whipped around, trying to connect.

He failed as Mudd stabbed him right through the heart.

/

BTM wiped his hands while seven Gorons laid down around him, dead.

He walked several meters to the gates and put his hand over the lock, locking for the key in his pocket with the other hand.

Then two wires in his head connected.

_SEVEN Gorons are dead? But what happened to the eighth-_

The one Goron that escaped slammed his face into the iron gates.

\

Mudd had four Zora with him. They _borrowed_ some weapons from the armory, leaving a note for the Gorons:

_I hope you don't mind if we use these for a while -The Zora army._

Before they had left the jail room, Mudd broke his sword against the cell wall. Carefully, he slid the deceased general's sword and scabbard off and carried them himself.

As the group worked their way up to the gates. BTM should have opened them by now.

Mudd looked first and saw BTM's figure fighting eight other Gorons. He would throw a stone if they started to group together, and they would be forced to dive out of the way. From there, BTM could charge down the lone one.

***Note: If you are fighting multiple Darknuts (misspelled) on Twilight Princess, then you can divide the group by using your slingshot and doing what BTM just did.***

Mudd watched as BTM fumbled for the gate key. Mudd saw a Goron sneak towards BTM and slam his face into the iron gate.

Mudd charged over and killed the Goron.

Then the alarms sounded.

"GO!! GO!! GO!!" Mudd and BTM yelled. "RETREAT!!" The Zora ran out the gates, while Mudd and BTM rushed them out. Soon, BTM left and Mudd was about to follow him- when a hand reached out of the shadows and grabbed him.

/

A/N

(Starlll, Nintendo64, Uiod, and BTM707 are playing Super Smash Brothers Brawl.)

Uiod: Go Pit!!

Nintendo: (gets the smash ball.) LANDMASTER!!

Starlll: Oh no- (Marth gets knocked off the stage.) Dang!

BTM: NO! (Gets knocked off the stage.)

Uiod: (Pit and Fox (Uiod and Nintendo) Are the only ones left.) You aren't ready yet!

Nintendo: Come on!

Mudd: Will you four stop playing and do the author's notes?

Starlll: (ignoring Mudd) Yeah yeah yeah, whatever.

Mudd: Shut up.

Starlll: (ignoring Mudd)Yeah yeah yeah, whatever.

Mudd: (gets an idea) Are you an idiot?

Starlll: (ignoring Mudd)Yeah yeah yeah, whatever.

Mudd: (laughs) can I have all the stuff in your room?

Starlll: (ignoring Mudd)Yeah yeah yeah, whatever.

Mudd: Can I have a turn?

Starlll: (Turns around) What? (moment of silence) No.

Nintendo: Yes! I won!

Starlll: Tell me something that doesn't happen every day.

BTM: Okay. Author's notes?

Starlll: Sure. Happy author's week, by the way.

BTM: What?

(Starlll's sister, PeppermintTwist (I don't know why she chose that as a fanfiction name) walks into the room.)

PeppermintTwist: What?

Starlll: Author's week is when you devote all week to Fanfiction! You do your homework as fast as you can, then make a beeline to the computer.

PeppermintTwist: Sounds like something stupid you just made up.

Starlll: No. It's something stupid Nintendo made up.

Nintendo: Yeah!

PeppermintTwist: So you're going to do something you think is stupid?  
Starlll: Do you even know me?!?!

PeppermintTwist: Whatever. (Walks away.)

Starlll: Now for the review corner!

The Review Corner

_Despite the fact that you're guest starring, submitted by BTM707:_

_/  
*yells to other reviewers of HNiM2* Hey! Get your act together, you bunch of  
lazy reviewers! And review my story while you're at it!_

\

Starlll: Yeah! Review my story THEN Legend of Zelda: Phantom hourglass! It's hilarious!__

Drafted? ...Oh! So THAT'S why there was an army of Zora on my doorstep about  
an hour ago! 

\

Zora army: You just figured that out?

_/_

_Good, 'cause that was really starting to confuse me. That and the  
fact that they even knew where I lived..._

\

Zora: We know where you sleep, too!

_/ _

_But oh well! I'm now a general of the Zora army!_

\

Mudd: And a darn good one, too!

/

_WE'RE TAKING YOU DOWN, YOU ROCK-EATING (censored)!  
Ehehe... (censored) is really (censored) fun._

\

Link/Uiod: I know. That scene we did was our favorite so far.__

And now: Advertising!

\

Starlll: I stopped Free advertisement in the last story!

/

_"Mudd, the mysterious fighter. Phantom Hourglass, the horribly screwed-up parody. Both together in the same web page! Coming next chapter: Mudd's inevitable cameo in the fan-author's story, Phantom Hourglass.  
Coming this weekend (I hope)."_

\

Mudd: (Wind Waker) Yeah, I had some fun on that chapter.

Starlll: But it isn't up yet.__

Yeah, me saying I'd have the next chapter up by the weekend last time was actually the thing that motivated me to get it written. We'll see how that  
goes now.

\

Starlll: It didn't work. (Makes a sad face through his mask.)

/

_Man, this is massive! But I have one thing left to say.  
_\

Starlll: I think you'll like this, Mudd.

/_  
Five-star three course steak and potato dinner with your choice of wine.  
Enjoy, Mudd. _

\

Mudd: (Twilight) You are now my favorite reviewer.

Mudd: (Wind Waker.) What are you talking about- he was talking about me. I'm the one who's the cameo on Phantom!

(The two Mudds start fighting.)

BTM: So is that it?  
Starlll: Yep. Stay, leave, it's your choice.

BTM: Okay.

Narrator: What will happen to Mudd? Will he survive the Gorons? What happened to Rutabaga? And Ruto? Will BTM stay? Find out next time on-

Starlll: Shut up, Chip!

Chip: Sorry.


	12. Holy Goddesses

A/N:  
Starlll: (Playing as Marth on Super Smash Bros. Brawl) Oniya, Metagra, Nintendo!

Nintendo: (Playing as Fox) Come on, Uiod!

Uiod: (Playing as Pit) You're not ready, yet BTM!

BTM: (Playing as Toon Link) (insert Toon Link yell.)

Mudd: (Makes LoZ Twilight noise) Do you ever do anything besides play that idiotic game?

(Moment of silence.)

Starlll: No, not really.

Mudd: You're stupid, Starlll.

Starlll: Well, I'm also dumb!

Nintendo: Yeah! You're insane!

Starlll: Quiet.

\

Ruto was walking through the forest. The Kokeri woods to be exact.

"Hey! You!" A boy, who looked about nine or ten, yelled. "What are you doing here!? I'm Mido, boss of the Kokeri!"

"Let me through." Ruto said, trying to push him aside.

"Hey! You can't come through here unless you bring a sword and shield!"

"What?"

"Oh... sorry. Wrong game. But you still can't go through!"  
"Says who?!"

"Mido! Boss of the Kokeri!"

/

Meanwhile, with Starlll:  
Starlll: Wow! A bickering match between Ruto and Mido!

BTM: Yeah! The two most annoying people in the game!

Nintendo: This is going to be good.

\

Back with the two brats:

"I know. You just said that. I'm Queen Ruto. Queen of the Daen Zora, so I have more power than you."  
"Well, according to the blockhead's guide to thirst for power, the person who owns the land has more power, unless it is a house, in which-"  
"I know, I memorized that book front to back. Let me through!"

"Remember rule number 945, subsection G?"  
"Don't eat roast cucco? Yeah. That rule is so important- roast cucco is a murder on digestion- wait a minute! Just let me through."  
"Say please."  
"I'm the queen of the Zora! I don't say please!"

"Fine then, leave!"  
_Is Rutabaga worth ruining my perfect spoiled brat reputation?_ Ruto thought.

Ruto pushed Mido aside and kept walking.

/

Last time:

_The alarms sounded._

"_GO!! GO!! GO!!" Mudd and BTM yelled. "RETREAT!!" The Zora ran out the gates, while Mudd and BTM rushed them out. Soon, BTM left and Mudd was about to follow him- when a hand reached out of the shadows and grabbed him._

\

This time:

Mudd felt like gravity stopped pushing him down and the thousand pounds of air was gone.

A crossbow bolt hit the wall where Mudd's head was half a second ago.

He turned his head around to see who grabbed him, but no one was there.

Uiod was watching from several meters away, and had no idea what happened.

_Could there be a possibility... no. That's crazy._ He thought remorsefully. _Goddesses above- even the Goddesses don't believe it._

Uiod turned invisible like a ghost and walked through the group of Gorons who were looking for Mudd (and doing a very bad job of it) and looked for the man who grabbed Mudd.

He was gone.

Uiod closed his eyes for a moment and swore.

He flew up atop of the wall and saw the man. He had a long dark-brown cloak, with a dagger on his hand.

Uiod couldn't get a clear view on anything else- though. He was still invisible, but the man seemed to know that he was being pursued, because he was dodging left and right, staying out of range.  
_ The Goddesses can't even see me when I do this- how can he?!_

/

Mudd was cornering the base, almost to the gates. They were still open- the idiot Gorons left a way out wide open for the Zora to escape!

"Hey! You!"  
Mudd whipped around and saw a Goron.

_Please be a traitor. PLEASE be a traitor!_

"Listen, don't kill me. I'm a traitor to the Gorons."

_Well isn't that a nice coincidence._

"Here come the guards- good thing I stopped you."

_What just happened?_

Mudd took out his sword- it WAS general Connor's- and stabbed him. It was a large two-handed sword and Mudd used it with one hand.

_Well don't I look like Ike._ Mudd thought.

***Note: Yes, Ike from Fire Emblem.***

Mudd ran full speed to the gates, diving away from arrows.

There was one point when an Arrow missed by an inch, but it still missed.

He got on his horse, and he and Gale rode away, going so fast that the Gorons made no attempt to chase them.

Strangely, Clukko wasn't there. Mudd was used to the lovable cucco following him everywhere, even finding him on missions, and standing on his shoulder.

\

Mudd rode all through the night, not stopping at all. Soon, he reached a halfway point between the two bases. It was a rocky area, perfect for concealing the Gorons who were waiting in ambush all night.

The first Goron shot a fist out, hitting Mudd right in the face.

Mudd fell off his horse and landed on the ground. Barely conscience, he laid there, waiting for his death.

_As I've thought before, it was fun while it lasted._

One Goron drew his bow, and fired an arrow at him.

The arrow shattered into a million pieces, another arrow going through it.

Mudd looked at the arrow- it was a gray shafted arrow, longer than most arrows.

Than he looked at the man who sent it, but he couldn't see the man. Mudd couldn't get up, or barely even move his head. The man had dived into the crowd of Gorons, cutting through them like a hot knife through cold butter.

One Goron got away, and ran towards Mudd.

Mudd, who couldn't even move, closed his eyes as the man's hands wrapped around Mudd's neck.

An arrow went through the Goron's.

As Mudd slowly moved the dead weight, he saw the man, in a long dark-brown cloak.

He had a knife and two throwing knives in his scabbard, and a massive longbow over his shoulder.

He had mud brown eyes and dark brown hair. A tarantula tattoo was on either wrist, and a bloody scar was on his forehead.

"Hey, son!"

Standing before him was his father, Mudd the first.

/

A/N  
(Everyone but Starlll and Pearson are standing still, mouths wide open.)

Starlll: (Laying down on the beach chair, sipping iced tea.) Now who said he was dead? I sure as heck didn't.

Meanwhile, with Silicon:  
Silicon: (Standing in front of LostWonder's house) Well, here it is.

Brian: Since when does she live in a palace?  
Stabby Larry: Well, it wouldn't be very fun to just break into a normal house, now would it?

\

/

P.S. Check out his name is Mudd1 one last time. The true Epilogue is up.


	13. Explainations

A/N  
(Everyone (but Starlll and Pearson) is still standing in shock.)

Starlll: Well, I have to wake everyone up somehow. (Dumps a bucket of water on Nintendo, BTM, and a few O.C.'s)

Nintendo: What was that for?!

Starlll: I had to wake you up somehow.

BTM: Shut up.

Starlll: Make me.

BTM: (Pulls out a sword) Thanks for the offer.

Starlll: (Pulls out a light saber) Do you _really_ want to do that?  
BTM: You want to take this outside?!

Starlll: Actually, there's no way out.

BTM: But what about the door?  
Starlll: That was just an illusion.

BTM: Than how do your O.C.'s appear on Cameos?  
Starlll: They go to the Cameo chamber!

BTM: What's the-

Nintendo: You don't want to know.

/

Free Advertisement: It's been a while since I've done this but... Check out Super Smash Bros. Rumble by GespenstKAF ! It's about what would happen if a bunch of new smashers (some from other games) came and joined the smash mansion! The idea is cliché, but the story is still really good. READ IT NOW!

\

Standing before him was his father, Mudd the first. He didn't look any older than Mudd the second, maybe a year, but that's it.

Muddll (Muddl means the first, Muddll means the second.) was speechless.

His father was dead. DEAD!

"I bet you're wondering how I'm still alive, aren't you."  
Muddll slowly nodded.

"Well... I'm actually surprised nobody figured it out by now. Especially good old Rutabaga. How is he, by the way?"  
Muddll told Muddl about Rutabaga's memory issue, and how he was probably dead, because he never reported back.

"I'm a long way from dead." A familiar voice came from Muddll's direction. Rutabaga was standing, alive. Scarred, but alive. "Actually, I did figure it out. I had one quick flashback, but that was enough. You _were_ telling me that a direct arrow or crossbow bolt usually wouldn't break through the skull, just the night before it happened. I also probably figured it out before I lost my memory, too."

***Note: If you didn't figure it out, than that's what Rut was going to tell Mudd- that his father was still alive.***

Muddl smiled. "That's him, alright."

"So let me get this straight: You got shot in the head, fell out a seven story building, and then, after being underwater for THREE DAYS, you're still alive!?"  
"Yeah, pretty much."

Muddll closed his eyes and then looked over at Rutabaga. "So, does this mean that you have your memory back?"

Rutabaga shrugged. "No, I don't think so. Just that one little memory."

Muddl looked at Rutabaga.

"Excuse me for this, but I have to knock you unconscious for a moment."  
"What!?"  
"Sorry. You also probably won't remember anything past waking up four days ago."

And with that, Muddll punched Rutabaga on the side of the head.

The Zora fell to the ground.

"Why did you do that?!"

"He can't hear the following conversation- or know that I'm still alive." Muddll started talking quicker. "If you want to know why I don't look so old, than here's the story:

There were triplets. The oldest (by three minutes) was named Solo. The second was named Skinner, and the youngest (by two minutes) was named Mudd.

Of course, these weren't their real names, but they wouldn't go by any thing else. When they were nine years old, their house burned down with their parents inside. Happy birthday kids. So the three lived off of stealing and making various bets.

When they turned fifteen, they were totally different then six years ago.

Solo was always looking for excitement. He would make bets with others that he could swim with sharks, jump from rooftop to rooftop, and other crazy stunts that could kill him.

Skinner was dark and shady. But if you looked very closely, you could see that crazy look in his eye that just wouldn't die down.

Mudd was a man who was always trying to imitate his brothers, but failed. He did however have a strange love for archery, even though he couldn't hit an elephant on steroids.

The trio had a reliantly good life, except for one very fateful day that would change their lives forever.

"I bet you fifty rupees that you can't load your arm with flesh-eating ants for 25 seconds!" One kid on the streets told Solo.

Naturally, Solo accepted the bet. Fifty rupees would buy dinner for a week.

Soon word spread of the unusual bet, and people began making wagers on who would win.

Skinner decided to make a theft using the bet's distraction.

Mudd watched from the roof tops, annoyed on how horrible at guarding the other people were.

Solo had put a jar of ants on left arm, closing his eyes waiting for the pain to be over. Then he suddenly toppled over in pain after ten seconds. But it wasn't from the ants. He was clutching both wrists.

Skinner was at a local shop. He was also annoyed at how lousy the guards were. He wished that he at least had a challenge as he grabbed several loafs of bread. Then he got his challenge.

He screamed as he fell head first over the walkway, food dumping all over him, but he didn't care. Skinner just wanted the sudden burning in his wrists to go away.

Mudd was laying on the roof, enduring the burning worst of all, as he rolled in pain.

Guards dived onto Skinner, arresting the young thief.

Note play the song 'Wisemen' by James Blunt until you're done reading.

The night before this had all happened, the three brothers were in a circle around a campfire.

They were at the burned remains of their parents house.

It was the night of their birthday, and they were beginning a strange chant.

"To-night is the-night," Solo began.

"We were born onto the Earth." Skinner continued.

"Also the-night, off our parents last-night." Mudd added.

"The times we enjoyed,"

"The times we hated,"

"Were all the same,"

"When looked at with an ice-cold eye." The three said at the same time.

"To-night." Solo started again.

"Our old lives' last day." Skinner continued.

"Our new lives' first day." Mudd added.

"Didn't change at aaaalllll!" The three said, getting louder.

"Please give us, goddesses, the gift of immortality." They said, half/yelling.

"The-gift of everlasting life" Solo asked for.

"The-gift of leadership." Skinner asked for.

"Any-gift-at-all." Mudd pleaded.

"We shall endure any curse to get these gifts, so long as we get theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeem."

Okay, stop playing 'Wisemen'."  
\

Muddll looked at his father.

"How long ago was this?"  
"337 years ago."  
Muddll believed every word.

"What happened to them? Your brothers, I mean."  
"I hear that Skinner was sent to jail, and then sent to slavery at Daen. As for Solo... I don't know what happened to him."

Muddll called to the sky:  
"Whoever is guarding my son, take a break for the day! Bring Rutabaga back to the base!"  
To Muddll's surprise, Rutabaga's body was lifted by an invisible force and soared through the air.

"I have to go now. Goodbye."

Mudd stopped his father.

"What do you mean!? You just got here! I want answers!"  
His father sat down.

"What do you want to know, kid?"

"I want to know why you didn't just tell everyone that you were alive! Why didn't you raise me?! Who is my mother?! Tell me, please!"

Muddl looked at him.

"I am getting tired of explaining, so tell me what you mean when you say you don't know who your mother is."

"Well... okay."

Flashback that isn't a memory of the actual person, just a collection of faaaaacts!!!

_Rusl was a man who had no wife (He does in the game, but not in my world), no children (He does in the game, but once again, not in my world.), and just about no life._

_That was until he had a knock on the door._

_He ran to see who was knocking, but no one was there._

_Instead, a baby in a carriage with a note was there._

_The note read:_

_Please take care of my son. I know how cliché it is, but please take care of him._

_P.S. His name is Mudd._

End of Flashback that is just a collection of facts, not an actual memoryyyyy!

"And that's what happened."

"That's what he told you?"  
"Yeah. I have the note in my pocket, if you want to read it."  
"Why do you have the note?"  
"I take it on all my missions. Don't really know why."

Muddl took the note and read it.

"Yeah, that's Malon's handwriting."  
"Now, answer my other questions. Why didn't you take care of me? Why did you fake your own death?!"

Muddl closed his eyes.  
"I faked my death because I knew Goro would keep trying to get me as many times as it takes. He seemed content with just me. If he wasn't, he might have killed Your mother, Link, everyone. I guess that sort of explains why I didn't raise you.

'You might wonder why I didn't just turn him in... I could tell that he would escape. Goro is like a train. He won't give up until he reaches his stop- plowing through anything in his way. I never made any effort to contact you because..." There was a moment of silence. "Because I saw Malon pregnant about five months after I was considered dead. I thought she had moved on, I thought she was married to some other man. I saw you about three years ago. Our resemblance is uncanny." Mudd slowly walked closer to his son and took his wrist.

Then he pulled Mudd the second's gloves.

Under them were two black tarantula tattoos.

"Goddesses, do you have no mercy?" He asked. "They heat up sometimes, don't they? Wake you up in the middle of the night and the pain in totally unbearable."

"Well... they don't hurt THAT much, but... it happens."

"I thought so. It happens to me. Still, I probably have it a lot worse, the curse directly on me. Mudd... son... this probably will be the last time you will ever see me. I need to find Skinner. I have heard rumors that a man who keeps his head under a hood all the time is in Crimeria, heading for Daen. This is the first legitimate trail I will ever get. If I find him... and survive... I will find you again."

Mudd the second closed his eyes.  
"But what about the war?"  
"Excuse me?"  
"The war. What about the war?"  
"The war... is about me. You probably meant something else by that, but you still have to know."

"It's about you?!" Mudd yelled.

"Yes. It's not about food and water or the four giants' sake, the Zora knew me. To them, I was their brother. I tried to stop it at the beginning, but I couldn't find a way to do it without showing my true face. Besides, even if they did think I was alive, than that wouldn't stop it, so there would be no point in it."  
Muddll got up again.  
"One more question, I swear:" This one was more curious than informative. "Are you really that good of a marksman?"

He laughed and took his bow off his shoulder, casually loading an arrow.

"You see that cucco's head, about a mile away?"

Muddll strained his eyes and saw a white cucco (Not Clukko, Clukko is brown) about a mile away from where he was standing.

"Yeah."

Muddll let go of the bowstring.

"Now you don't."

Muddll put a blade of grass and played a tune on it.

"Listen, Son, I need you to do something for me." He said as he watched a dust cloud storm towards him. "I need you to do something that only my son could do." The dust cloud turned out to be a horse (Arrow), and Muddll was climbing onto him. "I need you to succeed where I failed. I need you to end this Hell of a war. I need you to have someone Help you. Someone who's fast, someone who's a good fighter. Someone who can keep coming back. Someone who's smart...... Someone who you can trust."  
And Muddll left.

Mudd thought for hours, sitting in that one spot. He eventually decided.

_I'll do it. I know someone who's four of those six things. And I'll learn to Trust Hero eventually._

A/N  
Starlll: Plot twister!

BTM: Wait, does this mean that Mudd is going to try to stop this war?  
Starlll: Yep.

Nintendo: Glad to see that Mudd and Hero are finally teaming up.

Starlll: Yeah. Mudd without Hero is like Chip without Dale! Like me without you! Like... Like... like Ben without Jerry!  
Nintendo: NOT BEN WITHOUT JERRY!!

Starlll: The picture is to horrible to think about!

BTM: Okay... Are we doing the review corner?  
Starlll: (Crying) Ben without Jerry.

Nintendo: SO SAD!!

BTM: Oh well, here's my review. Because I was the only one who SENT a review!:

_HOLY (CENSORED)! Totally did NOT see that coming! He's alive? Mudd is  
actually still kicking around? WOOHOO!! Originally, my comment for this  
chapter was to be "...Clukko's missing? :'(" but THIS was way to interesting  
to pass up. And THANK you for posting the next chapter as well, now that I'm  
curious and all that. _

BTM: Well, apparently, they don't have any comments.

Starlll: (Still crying) Ben... Without Jerry...

Nintendo: BEN AND JERRY'S ICE CREAM!!

(The two start crying again.)

BTM: I wonder what Silicon is doing right now...

/

Meanwhile, with Silicon:

\

Silicon: Okay, we're inside LostWonder's house.

Stabby Larry: Wow. Hey, is that a dog?  
(Red Panther from HNiM1 walks in)

Red Panther: Her Dog?! Let me at him!

Silicon: Still nursing that grudge?  
Red Panther: Let me at him-

(Sees LostWonder's dog)

Red Panther: I can't fight him.... HE'S TOO CUTE!!

Silicon: Okay...


	14. Recap

A/N

Starlll: Alright, sorry if it took me a while to write this chapter- I've been working on my other Fanfic, Sci-Phy.

Phy: It's pretty good, if you ask me.

Mudd: You're just saying that because you're the main character.

Phy: His Name is Mudd2 is bad.

Mudd: No it isn't!

Phy: Is to!

Mudd: Is not!

Phy: Is to!

Mudd: Is not!

Phy: Is to!

Mudd: Is not!

Phy: (Tricking him) Is not!

Mudd: See? We finally agree.

Phy: But- you- and the...

Mudd: Did you really think I would fall for that?

Phy: Fine. I agree that it is a bad story.

Mudd: Yes it is- wait! But... I hate you, kid.

Phy: I know, I'm dead... but it was totally worth it.

/

His Name is Mudd2 Recap:

\

Note: I'm making this because there are a couple things that I want to put an emphasis on.

/

Starlll: This recap is hosted by me, and good old Mudd the first.

Camera man: A-hem.

Starlll: (Annoyed) And Chip, the camera man.

Mudd: (Wearing a tux) This is for all the red-head woman on horse farms/ranches.

Starlll: Mudd.

Mudd: Sorry.

Chip: Does anyone have some food?

Starlll: Shut it. Now, the fiction is about a war between the Gorons and the Zora-

Mudd: No, duh.

Starlll: Will you be quiet?

Mudd: No.

Starlll: I figured. So the story starts off with a big bang-,

Chip: (Musically) It's the Big Bang theory!

Starlll: Anyway, Hero, the fat idiot, was bit by a werewolf.

Hero: That's a lie: I'm not fat.

Starlll: Go away! So, on a mission, he meets an imp- or Twilight- named Midna.

Mudd: Then, Mudd (The second) has to leave on a trip to deliver a sword and shield to the Royal Family in Castle town. He was ambushed by the Gorons, though, and never really got around to completing the delivery.

Starlll: When Mudd joined The Zora side of the army, he also met and became good friends with an acquaintance of his father. Rutabaga.

/

_Mudd gave a rare smile. "Fine, I accept."  
"Good. My name is Rutabaga, top level archer."_

"_My name is Mudd."_

\

Mudd: Then, a strange angel named 'Uiod' seems to appear out of nowhere and saves Mudd from General Connors, a high-ranking Goron General.

Starlll: Though, nobody aside from Midna knows his real name:

/

"_Kolak-" Uiod took his hands off his throat, which didn't have any damage on it, and clamped them over Midna's mouth. _

\

Starlll: Uiod also seems to know the Goddesses, but that is just from implication, and I usually just imply things that I don't mean.

Mudd: Like me dieing?

Starlll: Buddy, you could get thrown off a cliff, down eight flights of stairs, stabbed over and over again, and sucked into a hurricane- and you would still be alive, you roach.

Mudd: Anyway, on one of his missions, Hero gets the assistance of the light spirits 'Eldin' and 'Faron' for help.

Starlll: It's just left at that, really, but in the far, far, far later chapters, they'll come back.

Mudd: Life goes on pretty well, then it is turned upside down when Rutabaga loses his memory on a mission, right before telling Mudd a grave secret about his father.

/

"_Mudd... in case I don't make it out alive... there's something you should know about your father." Mudd was slightly startled by the change of subject. Rutabaga hadn't brought up Mudd the first since they first met. "You see... when he died, he said something-" _

(Two soldiers drag him away)

(Two weeks later)

"_Rut?!" He yelled as he ran into the room. Rutabaga had white bandages around the back of his head. "Dear Din, thank the Goddesses that you're alright! Don't you know not to climb into ice boxes? Those things are deathtraps!"_

_Rutabaga stared at him blankly and said:_

"_Can I ask you something?"  
"Yeah, anything!"_

"_Who the heck are you?"_

\

Starlll: Then, Ruto, the queen of the Daein Zora, found out about Rutabaga's memory loss and for reasons we haven't been told yet, leaves to find him- and has an argument with Mido, the second biggest brat in the game.

Mudd: Then, later, Uiod (Who gets a break from guarding Mudd for three hours every other full moon) breaks into Link's house and tortures him for information.

Starlll: Then Uiod goes to Midna because he has to talk to Hero- which is impossible because either Uiod will be protecting Mudd, or Hero will be a wolf. We are once again never actually told WHY he needs to do either of the two, but he seems to need to do them all the same.

Mudd: Then a new General comes- General BTM- and comes up with a plan to take over a Goron base.  
Starlll: The mission turns out to be a failure, and the Zora run for their lives. Mudd gets captured and has to break out- on his way back to the base, Mudd gets ambushed by Gorons.

Starlll: You expect him to be saved by Rut or Uiod- but then the story takes an unexpected turn and Mudd, who a presumed dead, comes back from the grave and saves him, later explaining that he faked his death.

Mudd: Then I tell my so to do something that turns the world _upsidedown_.

/

"_Listen, Son, I need you to do something for me." He said as he watched a dust cloud storm towards him. "I need you to do something that only my son could do." The dust cloud turned out to be a horse (Arrow), and Muddll was climbing onto him. "I need you to succeed where I failed. _

_'I need you to end this Hell of a war. _

_'I need you to have someone Help you. Someone who's fast, someone who's a good fighter. Someone who can keep coming back. Someone who's smart... Someone who you can trust."  
And Mudd the first left. _

\

Starlll: So this means that Mudd and Hero are probably going to team up and try to end the war- along with a few others... and a fire Emblem crossover.

Mudd: and one last thing: In the second chapter, Silicon had his moment stolen by LostWonder (who hasn't reviewed in a century), so now he is working his way to her house to t_ake care of her_ if you catch my drift.

__()__

__/\__

__\/__

__/\__

__\/__

__()__

Meanwhile, with Silicon:

Silicon: (In LostWonder's house) (Hears a noise) What was that!?

Stabby Larry: I think it's a burglar!

Brian: I know what to do. (Flies over to the shadows, near the thief.)

??: (To the thief) Jesus is watching you.

Thief: What?! (Turns around, but doesn't see anyone.)

??: Jesus is watching you.

Thief: What was that!? (Sees Brian) Oh.

Brian: (Lying) I'm a parrot.

Thief: Okay... what's you're name?

Brian: (Lying) Moses.

Thief: Who names their parrot 'Moses'?

Brian: (Lying) Probably the same person who names their Rottwhiler 'Jesus'.

Thief: I have no regrets. (Runs away screaming, tricking all of the alarm systems.


	15. Death

A/N  
Starlll: Author's week is coming up!

BTM: But wasn't that about a month ago?

Starlll: It happens whenever we want it to. Generally during school vacations.

BTM: Okay...

Starlll: One more thing: I know how annoyingly short this is, but I really wanted to highlight this event, so I decided to dedicate an entire chapter to it.

/

Cor Goron was dieing.

He was on his deathbed,

he was finding it harder to breath every moment,

and he knew it was happening.

Next to Cor Goron was Darbus, praying that he would live.

"Darbus." Cor Goron's voice was old and raspy. "Bring me Hero. I need to see Hero."

"W-why?" It was easy to see he was holding back tears.

"I need to see him. Please."  
Darbus left.

\

Cor Goron and Hero were alone in the room.

"You wanted to see me, sir?" Hero asked.

"Yes... I am... dieing..."

_Obviously_.

"Hero... this war... stop it..."

"E-excuse me, sir?"

"This war... is why... I'm dieing. Please... try... to stop it. End it... please."

"You want me to stop the war?"  
"Yes... Din, you are stupid. Team up with him... team up with Mudd."

"Are you afraid of dieing?" Hero asked. It was the least he could do.

"I was. Now that I look back on it... I see that I lived a blessed life. Thank you... Goddesses."  
"COR GORON!"

Cor Goron was dead.

/

Starlll: Nueez! Luigi!

BTM: But Luigi didn't die.

Starlll: Oh.


	16. The Turning Point

A/N

Starlll: HAPPY BIRHDAY!

Pearson: Pardon?

Starlll: Well, I'm about to make a new O.C., so I'm just wishing him a happy birthday.

Pearson: okay...

Starlll: Okay, you might want to turn around.

\

Disclaimer: (asleep)

Gui (Guy) (My subconscious.): (Asleep)

Guy walking down the street: Wake up!

Disclaimer: Make me!

/

Queen Ruto was approaching one pf the main Zora bases. It was the one where Zulu said Rutabaga was.

"YOU!! Put your hands in the air!" A guard yelled.

Ruto ignored him and kept walking.

"Did you hear me!? I said to stop moving and put your hands in the air!" The Zora grabbed her arm.

"Let go of me!" Ruto yelled, slapping him.

The guard let her through.

\

Mudd was climbing up Death Mountain.

The scene where his father told him to end the war was playing in his head over and over again. He could still remember the TWANG from when he let go of the bowstring.

The climb was hard to describe, mostly because aside from the thoughts that were going through Mudd's head, nothing happened.

"Okay, here we go." He said, looking through Hero's window.

Hero was eating like a salvage dog, downing sausages and roast cucco as fast as he could.

"Cocadoodle-do!"

Mudd turned around.

Hovering about three feet in front of his face, Clukko was crowing.

"Hey there, little guy. Where have you been?"  
/

About twenty minutes ago, with Hero:

\

Hero was in his room, laying down on his bed- if you could call it that.

It was made up of a few rags, put together, and each side was on a separate side of the room- hammock style.

He got up, and leaned over his shadow.

"Hey, Midna, can I ask you something?"

Midna flew out of his shadow.

"Yeah, sure."

"What do you think Cor Goron meant before he died? He told me to end the war with Mudd."

Midna laughed. "He probably meant that he wanted you to team up with Mudd and end the war."

"Well I know that." Hero said obviously. "I meant whether you thought he was serious, or just mad from death. Do you think I actually should?"

Midna shrugged. "I don't really know. But I think he had his mind right _to the very end._ Team up with him. It's what Cor Goron would want you to do."

Hero walked to the door.

"I'm going to have to chew this over with dinner. You want me to get you something from the mess hall?"

Midna thought about what happened a few weeks ago...

**/**

**F_l_**a**s**_h_b**a**_c_k (It takes longer to do that then you think)

\

"_Hey, I'm going down to the Mess. You want anything?"_

"_What is there to eat?"_

"_Lemme see... Meat, bread, meat, gravy, meat, beans, meat, some ugly thing that no one wants to eat, meat, water, meat, fish, meat, chocolate, meat, pudding... and... did I mention meat?"_

"_I'm a vegetarian." Midna said._

"_I thought you were a Twilight."  
"It means I don't eat meat."_

"_I though Twilight was the time of day when the sun was almost gone." Hero said, stupidly._

"_It does. A vegetarian is a person who doesn't eat meant. I'm both."_

"_Was your mom a vegetarian, and you dad a Twilight?"_

"_No! Being a vegetarian isn't a type of religion or anything like that! It just means that I don't eat meat!"_

"_But I heard two people saying it's not a diet, just a way of life." Hero replied._

_Midna slapped her forehead. "I'll find something for myself, for the Four Giants' sake."_

_/_

_E_n**d** _o_f **F**_l_a**s**_h_b**a**_c_k

\

"No thanks, I'm good."  
Hero left, saying that he needed a moment, so he would chew it over with Twix (Which I do not own. I own a Twix bar, but not the brand name.). Whatever that is.

The moment Hero walked out, Uiod turned invisible, walked through the wall, and reappeared, in front of Midna.

"Mudd's coming." He said flatly, then left again.

/

Present time, Daein:

\

"Come on, Micaiah!" A man, about 17, said to a girl about the same age as him.

"I'm going as fast as I can, Sothe!" Micaiah said.

She was wearing a-

/

Skinner: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! This is a _Legend of Zelda _story. Not Fire Emblem!!

Pearson: He is doing a crossover. It was my idea.

Mudd: Say, where's Starlll?  
Pearson: He is going through the painful... and disgusting... process of making a new O.C. Nobody is allowed in his room until he is done.

(Loud screaming noises come from upstairs.)

\

As I was saying before I was oh so rudely interrupted:

She was wearing... okay, I'm bad at descriptions, so go to . , and that's what she looked like.

Micaiah's orange (yes, orange) bird, Yune, was following her. (For those of you who know who Yune is REALLY is... don't say anything.)

"That bird follows you everywhere. It's kind of freaky." Sothe called over.

"You're just jealous."

Apparently, the two had wandered into Goron territory while leaving Daein. Normally, Micaiah would rather talk it out with them, but Sothe lost his temper... and... well... now they have several dozen armed Gorons on they're tail.

As said before, I'm bad at descriptions, so go to . . It gives a pretty dang good picture of what Sothe looks like.

"You have _got_ to take a few anger management classes!" Micaiah called over.

"Hey!"

"I'm just kidding."

The Gorons began rolling like wheels, running over the rocky ground easily from years of practice.

"I think there's a cave that crosses into Hyrule near here. Come on, let's go!" Sothe called over.

"But Hyrule is under war!" Micaiah called back.

"Better than getting crushed by these guys!"

/

Meanwhile, in Hyrule:

\

"Okay, there's no turning back, now." Mudd said, and carefully opened the window.

The moment Hero saw Mudd, he jumped back and grabbed his sword. "I haven't come to fight. The opposite, in fact."

"The... opposite?" Hero asked.

"Listen, I want to end this war. I _know_ you do, too. Look at what this has done! My best friend lost his memory, riots are forming, _people are dying_! Come on. Will you fight with me?"

"Dude, you climbed up the mountain, broke through my window, and then started rambling on about how the war is bad, and now you want me to fight with you to end this. First off, you didn't have to break the window. Second, you interrupted today's third dinner. And last, my answer is yes."

"That's it? No dramatic comeback? I didn't have to break through the window? You eat three dinners? For crying out loud, man! There are starving kids in Termina! Now we know why!" Mudd replied.

"But before we start... this, you ought to meet someone."

"Who?"

"Come on, Midna."

/

Starlll: Finally. Well, everyone, meet Dyna!

(A black dragon flies in.)

Dyna: GYOOOAAA!!!!

Mudd: You spent ALL DAY on THAT?!

Starlll: You'll see why.

P.S. I need some guidance on who you want to join the team. You see, I narrowed it down to these people, but I can't use them all. So, who do you _**not**_ want to make the team?

A) Sothe and Micaiah

B) Mr. E (who am I kidding?! Of course I'm using him!)

C)Shad the Well-Read and Ashei the Rude Warrior (Those two people from Telma's bar)

D)Rusl (And if he _does_ make the team, there will be a BIG-BIG-BIG surprise.)

\

Starlll: Well, that's about all for now. Oh, and sorry that this took so long. It would be up sooner, but there was a technical glitch or something with Fanfiction, so...


	17. Coming Home

A/N

Starlll: (On Ikariam) I am going to pillage this guy so badly. He's going to-

(Doorbell rings again)

Starlll: I really don't want to go through this again. (Sticks his head out the window.) (To the guy who rang the doorbell.) Okay, I'm only going to say this once: Youaren'tsupposedtoringthedangdoorbellbecauseitt'soutoforderandthefactthatitjustworkeddoesn'tmeanthatitactuallyworks(deep/Breath)sojusttellmewhyyou'reherebecauseIhaveahugepillagegoingonatIkariam.

Guy: I'm your friend, Jos-

Starlll: Phantom! Come on in!

(A guy with a Ying-Yang mask and robes, almost identical to Starlll's walks in)

Phantom: Hey!  
/

Micaiah and Sothe were carefully walking through the cave leading to Hyrule.

"Okay, I think we're almost out." Micaiah said, tired.

"Are you sure we should go into Hyrule?" Sothe asked. "The Gorons probably stopped chasing us by now."

"Yes. I have a feeling that it's the right thing to do. Trust me on this."

"You know I trust you."

\

It was about two weeks after Mudd and Hero teamed up.

The three (Midna included) were living in a forest near a Goron base called 'Fort Nox'. The Fort was covered in guards. It had ballistics and catapults, and archers everywhere.

The irony was, almost none of these soldiers had more than a month of training.

"Which is why it is the perfect target." Mudd finished.

"I'm not sure." Hero said.

"You're not sure about _anything_."

"Nuh-uh!" Hero said. "I'm sure that Midna is part-Twilight, part-Vegetarian!"

Mudd raised an eyebrow towards Midna, who shrugged.

"I told you! A vegetarian is just a person who doesn't eat meat!"

"Right! Gang up on the fat guy!"

/

"Okay, Mudd. Are you ready?" Midna asked. "It's going to be a bit uncomfortable for a moment."

Mudd shrugged, though he was slightly... well, let's just say he wasn't quite sure of this part of the plan. The though of being pulled through into someone's shadow didn't exactly appeal to him.

_Where'd Midna go?_ He thought.

Then, he felt a hand grab onto his ankle.

_Oh._

It's hard to accurately describe how Mudd was pulled in, but I think it would be best related to how in LoZ: Twilight Princess, Midna pulls Link through one of the black doorway things that turn Link into a wolf.

Mudd was inside Hero's shadow, along with Midna. After all, the perfect hiding spot is right under someone's nose.

There was more room than Mudd expected-though he wasn't complaining.

Midna felt slightly awkward that she was pressed back-to-back with Mudd. Especially considering her first thoughts when she first saw him.

\

Flashback!!!

_/_

_It wasn't when Hero introduced Mudd about three weeks ago, or during that fight._

_It was right after Hero (as a wolf) tried to eat Mudd._

_Midna was laying back against a tree, considering what to do with him. Who could tell how long he would be out for, and she couldn't just leave him there._

_He was laying on the floor, and she still hadn't seen his face clearly yet._

_Hero walked by and lifted the man's face._

"_Wait a moment! This is Mudd of the Zora army!" Hero yelled._

"_Who?" Asked Midna._

"_He's led a ton of attacks against the Gorons! I practically warship him! People in the army says he painted a target on the back of his head for the Gorons- that's how many battles he's fought!!" Hero crowed._

He's kind of cute, I guess. Wait- did I honestly just think that? About a _Hylian?! _I have to get out more."_ Midna thought._

\

End of Flashback!!

/

Hero walked into the base, not worried about anything.

After all, why should he be? The Gorons don't know that he's a traitor yet, and they think he was just coming to dinner.

The plan was simple:

Knock everyone unconscious.

Put 'em in the dungeon.

Don't kill them.

Keep them in the dungeon.

Don't let them out until the war is over.

That's about all.

They chose this base for another reason: They had a dungeon that took up the entire basement- and floor below the basement.

I'm not sure whether I should write this scene or not. I've decided to cut down on the violence and add more humor.

Besides. There's a lot of aftermath.

\

The aftermath:

/

Mudd laughed, wiping sweat off his face.

It felt good for some reason, to do this. Like, he was finally getting some redemption for the murder he committed. All without losing a drop of blood.

Then, he heard singing.

It was mostly a melody, but that didn't matter.

Mudd chased after the sound, rushing through the hallway.  
He saw a bit of a white robe around a corner.

The chase continued. He was about to see him/her- dead end.

"Where did he go!?" Mudd yelled.

He backed up and saw Hero.

"Who just ran through here?" Mudd asked.

"You did!"

_Where did he go!?_

Okay, not much aftermath, but you just wait.

\

Author's notes:

/

Starlll: I miss Silicon.

Phantom: Who's he?

Starlll: He's my apprentice. He left somewhere in the beginning of this, so now he left to _ take care_ of a person who stole his moment.

Phantom: What is he trying to learn? You just sit around all day.

Starlll: How am I supposed to know?!

Silicon: (Bursts through the door) Here's Johnny!!

Starlll: SILICON!!

( 0 0 )

[ ] 7 [ ]

l__l__l

Silicon: Hey! I'm finally back from my tour!

Starlll: What happened?!

Silicon: Let's see...

\

Flashback!!

/

Silicon: Okay, through this wall is LostWonder15. Any idea how to get through?

Stabby Larry: (Shrugs) Like this. (Pulls out a rocket launcher)

Brian: Wait! Don't fire-

(Large explosion.)

LostWonder15: Um... hello?

Duhn-duhn-DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHNNNN!!!


	18. Mr E

Starlll: (Laying on a beach chair next to Silicon.) You know, I'm not sure if everybody even knows you're back.

Silicon: (Laying on a beach chair next to Starlll) Why do you say that?

Uiod: Silicon! You're back!

Silicon: You saw me this morning!

Flashback!!

(Uiod walks in tired)

Silicon: (Holds out a cup of coffee) want a cup of Joe?

Uiod: (Pours a bowl of Lucky Charms) No.

End of Flashback!!

Starlll: You eat Lucky Charms?

Uiod: Shut up.

Silicon: Wait- you were the one who finished the Lucky Charms?!

Starlll: Wait- _you_ were the reason I had to eat Hyrule-O's?!

Uiod: Dude, we have like, twenty other cereals.

Starlll: Yeah, but I was looking for the box full of donuts, and my sister walked in the room.

Uiod: If she finds out that the donuts are in the box of raisin brand, we will DIE!!

Pepperminttwist: I knew I would find them!!  
Uiod: No! Well, at least the glazed are safe in the box of granola crunch.

Pepperminttwist: I still haven't left.

\

Message from the author:

From time to time, I'm going to do a 'meanwhile, past the fourth wall', and a little caption is going to be shown. Well, that's about it. -Starlll

/

Micaiah and Sothe were finally out of that annoying cave, and surrounded by fresh air and blue skies. (Sorry if I accidentally wrote the plural to the word 'ski')

"Glad to be out of there." Sothe said.

"Yeah." Micaiah agreed. "Wait- that voice again."

"Not again." Sothe said, chasing after Micaiah.

\

Meanwhile, past the fourth wall:  
Skinner: Yeah, that's Micaiah alright.

/

Okay, so Midna is passed out, I'm well on my way there, and Hero is in a choke hold.

The catch is, _one_ Goron did this to us.

_Unarmed_.

Maybe I should go back a few days.

\

Mudd's POV:  
/

It was about midnight, and I was sneaking through the hallways. I was looking for that person who I saw when we first took this place. If it _was_ an person.

No. I shouldn't think like that. Defiantly a person. Defiantly a person.

"Hey, Mudd, are you ready for that trip we're going on tomorrow?" Hero asked, running down the hall.

"Yeah, I think so."

"Good. Because if we run out of food, than I'm sorry, but I will have to eat you." Hero said with a straight face.

We laughed until Hero said:

"No, really. I'm serious."  
I slowly walked into the kitchen and packed some more food.

The morning came as usual, and Midna, me, and Hero-

"Wait, why did you say my name last?" Hero asked.

"Shut up."

As I was saying, Midna, _Hero_, and I went over the map one last time.

"So, we travel around the mountains, through the woods-"  
"To grandmother's house we go. We know this, Mudd." Hero interrupted. "Then we go through the Grudeo Desert and do a surprise attack to the behind of a Goron base."

I rolled my eyes. It wasn't as simple as it sounded, but Hero just seemed to have a way of making the intelligence in the room drop by talking.

So, the around the mountains was simple, and the woods had a scene involving leeches that I'd rather forget, so I'll skip over to the desert.

Every time I heard the name of this place, it gave me a sense of deja-vu.

"Hey, Midna, could you pass me my canteen?" Hero asked for the fiftieth time.

"No. You finished it two hours ago." Midna said, annoyed, for the fiftieth time.

"Then can I have some dessert?"

"For crying out loud, Hero! We went over this when you ate all the trail mix on the trail!" I yelled.

Then Hero continued walking- but now he had an eye on Clukko.

"Hey, guys, check this out!" Midna yelled, flying ahead of the group. When we caught up to her, we saw that she was digging up a large hunk of wood. "I think it was a piece of one of those hanging things... gallows, right?"  
\

Meanwhile, past the fourth wall:

Starlll: Here comes the speech.

/

"Everything surrounding us just goes to prove that there used to be life, even in this hot, dry, barren place." Hero stated. "And it also makes people think of how, one day, foreign people decades and centuries from now will find everyday artifacts and wonder of _our_ culture and lives."

"Wow, Hero. That was beautif-"

"Wait... and my lucky numbers are 8, 20, 24, and 36." Hero said, reading from a small slip of paper and chewing on the remains of a fortune cookie. Midna closed her eyes. "So, how do you think all these holes got here?"

"What hole-" I looked up to see a sea of holes, some skinny and some fat. Each seemed to be about six feet deep and a mound of dirt was next to it.

The three of us walked along a path that was about four feet wide with no holes.

"So, how do you think that all these holes got here?" Hero asked again.

"I don't know. Maybe _somebody dug them_." I said.

"Maybe... but I doubt it. I mean, how could one person dig this much?"  
"Well, there were probably more people helping him or her. Or _it_." Midna said.

_It. I was wondering if I saw something inhuman, and now so is Midna._

"Wait a moment- I see a building!" Hero cried, pointing to the horizon.

"Yeah... it looks more like a fortress, though." Midna replied.

"Whatever it is, let's check it out!"

We ran (and by that, I mean Hero and I- Midna flew.) towards the fortress- which we later named the 'Grudeo Fortress'. Big mistake.

Sand whipped into our eyes, and we stopped and started coughing for a moment.

"Wait, I see a person!" Hero yelled. We started running, lather, rinse, repeat.

"This isn't working." I said flatly.

"Wait, Midna, you know how you warped outside the cell I was in when I blew up that base?" Hero asked. "Well, do you think you can warp us over there?"

Midna shrugged. "I can try."  
I felt strange, like I was being sucked through a tube, and then spit out the other end- but I didn't feel like I was still moving- just that my feet were planted firmly in the ground.  
When my eyes stopped spinning, I looked up. In front of me was a Goron- and the biggest I have ever seen!

I could have sworn that 25 or 6 to 4 was playing somewhere.

He was digging a hole that was already about 5 feet deep with a shovel, about nine feet tall, and biceps the size of blimps. Long tattoos of snakes ran down his arms, and ended at his wrists. When you looked closer, though, you could see that he just had one extraordinarily long tattoo, which curved in several places. The needle must have been pretty sharp if it didn't break against his skin.

He didn't have a shirt on, which is why I could see this. His eyes were completely black, because he had no irises. It resembled an egg that had been burnt to a crisp.

\

Meanwhile, past the forth wall:

Mudd: (The First) (Clutches his daggers) I have a bad feeling about this guy.

/

"Umm... hello?" I asked. The Goron didn't even look up. "Hello?" Still, no response. The giant simply put the shovel outside the hole, picked up a large rock, and threw it at the Grudeo fortress, shattering it into a billion little pieces. "Hey! Can you hear me!? I really hope I'm not yelling at a deaf man. HELLOOOO!!"

The Goron looked up, saw me, and whispered like he hadn't talked in years "You are just a man of my imagination. Go away, please."

"We aren't a mirage, if that's what you're thinking. We're real." Midna said, forgetting not to be seen by anyone.

"Why, a Twilight. And at this age. But alas, I am just imagining it."

Hero got annoyed and slapped the Goron across the face, yelling 'You think you imagined that!?' But it only ended in Hero with a sore hand, and the Goron angry.  
He rammed Hero with his elbow. Midna tried to shoot him with an energy ball, but he merely backhand-slapped her and she was unconscious in a second.

I leaped onto his back. It probably wasn't the smartest move, considering what just happened to the rock, but Hero was the one carrying the weapons.

The Man Mountain threw me off his back and I landed in one of the million holes around us.

"Oh Din." I said quietly as a nest of scorpions began to crawl on me. "Oh-Din-oh-Din -oh-Din."  
Hero ran up to the Goron again, but got caught in a choke hold.

Hero got down on his knees while the Goron grasped his windpipe. He just stood there, as if he was used to it. Hero was trying to claw at his arms or face, but the Goron's arm was too long and hard.

Right then, when everyone was as good as dead, something in the man's head snapped, and he let go of Hero's throat, and ripped me out of the hole. He slapped the parts of my body where there were (ere) scorpions. That part of my body was numb for about three hours, but it was worth it in the end.

"Get on your way." He said. "Or you can come inside for a while, but I honestly hope you don't."

I didn't- I really didn't- but what choice did we have?

A/N  
Starlll: Sorry about how long this took- I was working on my other story, Sci-Phy. Well, that's about it. Bye.


	19. The Bomb

A/N

Starlll: I'm not going to play this off with a laugh. I haven't updated in a really long time, and I'm sorry. Even though I don't feel motivated because nobody is reviewing, that's no excuse. I'm sorry.

Silicon: On a brighter note, here is the next chapter that you have been waiting so long for:

\

"Amazing, isn't it?" Asked Micaiah.

"It is." Sothe agreed.

"Let's go see who's inside."

"Wait, Micaiah, I don't think that's a very good idea- why does she never listen to me?" Sothe asked nobody in particular, then ran inside the giant base.

/

Ruto walked into Rutabaga's room in the zora base.

"Rutabaga? Is that you?"

The Zora looked up from the arrows he was making.

"Depends. Who wants to know?"

"It's me, Ruto. Do you remember me?"

Rutabaga dropped his arrows, a flashback swarmed into his head, like a group of bees flooding inside of a hive.

\

Mudd woke up and jumped for a moment, forgetting that the Goron that nearly killed them made peace. Hero was laying down in one corner, while Midna was inside his shadow.

"I don't even remember going inside." He said quietly.

The tremendous Goron quietly walked into the room.

"Wake your friends up and leave. You had your stay." He said.

Mudd did as he was told.

"Come on, Hero, it's time to go."

Midna instantly flew out of Hero's shadow.

"They're coming!" She yelled.

"Who's coming!?" Mudd asked.

"The Twilight. Get ready for a fight, they're coming."

At the warning of a fight, Hero jumped to his feet, and grabbed his sword.

"The Twilight? Will the Goddesses never see me fit for forgiveness?" The rocky creature asked.

"I hope you can fight, because this is going to be bloody." Midna said.

"I won't."

"Okay, if you can't fight, then hide. Now, Mudd you-" Midna was interrupted by the Goron.

"It's not that I _can't_ fight, it's just that I _won't_."  
"Listen, Goron. Whatever your name is-"  
"Call me 'Mr. E.'"

"-_Mr. E,_ if you don't fight, you might **die**. Die."

"I won't."

"Well, then, Mudd, you see if you can make some catapults, or ballistics. Hero, you line up some bombs around this place."  
"I can do that." Offered Mr. E. "I have some pretty good explosives... as long as I don't fight."

"Okay then. You might as well make yourself useful. This is going to be pretty painful."

\

The Twilight army (From my point of view):

Bulbins are strange creatures. They have two horns on their head, green skin, red eyes, and a bandanna over their mouth. They ride on boars, and have no sophisticated language- aside from grunting and yelling.

Lizalfos are higher in rank, and can beat most people at swordsmanship with ease. They resemble large lizards that walk on their back legs. A low-rank lizalof has little to no armor, but a long sword. A high-rank lizalof is bigger, and hides behind shining gray armor. The highest-rank lizalof is called an aeralof. It has wings and dive bombs people with their sword. Sometimes, two or three will work together and pick up a person, dropping them from heights.

Dodongos are overgrown lizards which(Who really don't like smoke) (And if anyone wants to get technical and say that they aren't Twilight, be quiet.) crawl around, and have thick layers of scales that no force on this Earth can penetrate. The tail is the only unprotected area on their body. Dodongos can breath fire, and bite into people with their powerful jaws.

Stalfos are strange, to say the least. They were only marked on a danger level of 2 out of 10, and yet, no matter how many times you knock one down, slice it in half, crumble their bones into dust, they'll regenerate and come right back at you. They really are just skeletons with shields and _sometimes_ a weapon in their hands, though.

Finally, there are Darknuts. About eight (Eight!) feet tall, and covered in red, black or gold armor. Nobody has beaten this creature for hundreds of years. It's body structure is like a human's, though impossibly strong and fast. Darknuts speak in an unusual language, which only they understand.

/

"Come on, keep moving!" King Bulbin yelled. He rode on a large boar that was (Strangely.) blue.

A pack of about one hundred Twilight walked through the desert.

The bulk of the soldiers were Dodongos, because they were used to the intense heat of the desert.

There were also many bulbins riding on brown boars, and lizalofs merely walking.

Two Darknuts were on horseback (Black Grudeo Stallions.). Two were more than a fight for the group.

"To-ovouk, dallis howan-ton?" One warrior asked.

"Harrison-ford mo bill-e." The other replied.

(Do you smell gasoline?)

(No, but I do smell smoke.)

Then, right then, there was an explosion. Sand flew everywhere, choking bublins, and throwing Dodongos across the desert. The horses that the Darknuts were riding were safe, though, so at wasn't loss. The Darknuts' armor was ruined, and it is difficult to tell what happened to the Darknuts themselves.

Black and yellow smoke filled the air, intoxicating bublins, and several younger dodongos who's lungs weren't used to the smoke-ish toxins.

"Pretty good." Said Midna, who was watching the entire scene from several miles away. "Now, we... well, Mudd, Hero, and I, have to fight off the remaining."

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-Meanwhile, somewhere by Termina-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

\

Link was wearing his usual green tunic, on a usual day, and and taking what seemed like a usual walk. He hesitated, then walked inside the giant clock tower. It wasn't the one in the middle of Clocktown, that would be 'too obvious'.

"Can't believe I'm doing this." He said quietly. "I cannot believe that I am actually doing this."  
Link pulled a ladder out of the wall, and climbed up.

He closed his eyes and opened a treasure chest.

"I swore never to open this again... yet I also swore not to let _it_ happen again." (Link was talking about two different things, there.)

/

Back with the main characters:

\

Mudd shoved his sword in a dodongo's tail. It seemed to pour dark air out of it's body, then fade into thin air instead of dyeing. It was the same with bulbins (Though not the boars they rode on.), and occasionally left their wallets behind.

"Who said war isn't profitable?" Hero asked, picking up a blue rupee from a 'dead' bulbin.

"Say, where is that huge bulbin?" Asked, looking over the giant expanse of the desert. About a mile away, he saw the giant figure climb atop a giant boar. "What is he doing?" Mudd asked. "Is he leaving?"

/

Meanwhile, inside Grudeo Fortress:

\

Mr. E. Was sitting by a window.

_Maybe this was a sign. Maybe I'm supposed to go with them. I mean, what are the odds... not very good. Not good at all._

A Darknut ran through- not past, through- a closed door, breaking it into several pieces.

"Not impressive. People do that all the time in this story. Starting to get annoying, really. That aside, please leave. I have no quarrel with you, and I really think that to fight will end in horrible results."

"Quod nomen est sibby?"

(Did you light the bombs?)

Mr. E hesitated before answering.

"Raja mollekwa hra."

(No. But I created them... and gave them to the others.)

The Darknut pulled out it's gigantic sword.

"Gallalei-dyja!"

(Death!)

/

Outside The Fortress:

\

"So then, this is it? Are we just going to forget about Mr. E and live for the base?" Mudd asked.

Then, it with almost perfect timing, Mr. E and a darknut flew out a window, Mr. E holding the darknut down, expecting it to take the blow, which it did.

There was a moment which they all saw the Darknut in a twisted form, then it exploded into darkness.

"I'm going with you." The giant Goron said. And that's all that needed to be said.

/

Starlll: I just want you to know, the chapters will keep coming, regardless of reviews.

Silicon: But PLEASE review anyway.


	20. The Sacrifice

Author's notes:

Starlll: I almost deleted this. I came so close to losing it. I ran out of ideas. Just left me. But... I couldn't. So here it is. His Name is Mudd 2/ Chapter 20: The sacrifice. Oh, and also, don't expect me to update very often. And you, people who don't have accounts, I know you're out there. There's a mad penguin that has it in for you. Leave an anonymous review/normal review or else.

Tacky the Penguin: (Holds a buzz-saw menacingly) Gr-r-r-r...

/

"_Just one mo- question: Why do you want to j-n our army?" The Man asked Rutabaga._

"_At the risk of so-ding like a s-y, I'll keep to m-elf for now."_

"_I just w-ted to know, that's all. Con-tions, you p-sed every t-st with flying co-rs. - luck, kid."_

"_T-s, I'll -d it."_

\

"I remember something." Rutabaga said. "But it's really foggy. I think it was me joining the army. Why do you think that is?"

Ruto responded:

"I guess I'm involved with the reason why you joined. I think I understand further, though. But I'll have to think it over, first. Watch out, Rut."

Rutabaga watched as she left his room.

_I can't shake the feeling... that I KNOW her. More than most other people, at least. But how could she influence my decision on the army? I highly doubt I dated her. And there's no _way_ she could-_

But what ever it is that Ruto couldn't be, he was cut off by a sudden alarm.

"CODE 5!! CODE 5!! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!" Code three meant a massive attack. But code 5, that meant... bad things.

The Base Rutabaga was stationed at covered Zora's Domain, that meant if anybody broke through, with just a _little_ bit of dynamite, they could blow the roof and only entryway out, killing thousands of Zora lives.

_Oh Holy mother of Din. The guards are gone for the week. And we've been at a shortage for soldiers. Ah Din. Oh Din. O-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-oh Din. Zeph, Zark, 21, Commander... that's not very many people. There's probably a full bloody scale army coming! I'd better get my bow and knives-_

_/_

"_Yeah, I fight with these knives."_

"_What's that one for?"_

"_The big one? It's for cutting fruit. I know, strange, but-"_

\

"These flashbacks are getting annoying. I couldn't even see anything in that one." Rutabaga muttered, taking out his bow and knives.

/

"Gin." Rutabaga said, slapping down his cards.

"We're not playing gin, we're playing Blackjack." 21 said, annoyed out of her skull.

"Sorry. Okay... hit me."

"You're plus 5." (He's up to 14)

"Hit me."

"Plus three." (He's up to 17)

"Hit me." Rutabaga repeated.

"Plus 4." (He's up to 21)

"Hit me."

21 punched him in the ear.

"Ow!"

Waiting was a very annoying part of defending. Even if you know that others will attack, even how many, you can't be sure, and so you'll still have to keep watch.

"You owe me twenty-five rupees, now."

"Whatever you say, 21." Rutabaga responded, looking through a pair of Hawkeyes.

"Stop calling me 21." The female Zora warrior responded.

"Why, 21?" Rutabaga asked, smiling tauntingly. "It's a good nickname for you, you're always playing it, and so why not?"

"It doesn't start with a Z."

"Yeah, you're right... my name is pretty good. Rutabaga starts with a Z." He said sarcastically.

"Shut. Up."

"Nice response. That's original."

"Your face is original."

"You are _Very_ bad at comebacks." Rutabaga said, looking over a mountain with the Hawkeyes. "21-"

"My name isn't 21."

"-_Zoula_ let me see your gossip stone."

Gossip stones are sapphire rocks, about the size of a marble, that are sort of like phones- but only a few a linked together, (Which usually have the same symbol on it) so, if you want to talk to a person, you'll need the gossip stone with the same symbol that he/she has. If you don't understand a word of what I just said, I don't blame you. It just struck 1:00 A.M., so tough.

"Commander, I have sighting. South-South-west of my current position."

21/Zoula ran to the barracks, leaving Rutabaga behind. He shrugged, putting her gossip stone in his pocket.

"She'd better start taking care of her belongings more." He thought out loud, referring to the blue rock in his pocket which she forgot to take back.

\

"You know, I really think we can make, a stand- considering that they don't know that we're here." Zeph, the swordsman said.

"You see, this one is mine." Zark said, picking up a huge ax.

"Big weapon doesn't make a big man." And 21 picked out a bow with two large quivers of arrows. If she wanted to make up for all of the missing bowmen, she'd have to shoot like a ballistica.

"21, Rutabaga, you two go to the roof and hide until my signal. Zark, Zeph, put on all

the armor you can carry and defend the hallway. I'll be at the front lines."

The five brave warriors saluted and split up.

/

"We have to get this door down, if we want to take the castle." The Goron commander shouted. "Stupid eld- I mean, Giavani, try to pick the lock."

The Stupid Elder (From ch. 2) tapped on a few key points to the lock.

"Come on!" He muttered. "Open up!"

Then a voice came from the inside.

"You didn't say 'Please'!"

A tiny bit of bomb powder went off and blew away his several fingers. The Stupid Elder dropped to the floor, and Commander opened the giant door.

Before the Gorons could react, he lit two fuses and dynamite blew support beams holding a load of boulders up- letting it come crashing down.

Commander shouted a few words from an unusual language, and a flash of lightning struck. The electricity spread through the Gorons' armor. He managed to cut in half the 200 hundred warriors that were attacking before he was shot down.

Rutabaga and 21 figured that commander's death was as good of a signal as any, and began firing a rain of arrows at the troops as they ran inside. The two Zora fighters drew their secondary weapons (21 had an ax (Go figure), and Rutabaga had knives), and ran down the trapdoors.

\

There is only one way in from the entrance to the main point, where all of the plans, lists of guards/soldiers, etc. reside, and the entrance is. And that one hallway was guarded by Zark, and Zeph-two Zora covered from head to toe in armor.

Zark swung his steel poleax like mad generally in circular motions like a baton.

Zeph used his great lance and pierced through the armor of Gorons, slowly building a 'wall' of Gorons that would make the entrance and battle even harder to get through.

All was going well-they may even would have stopped the Goron invasion right there- if Zark hadn't lost his grip on the ax. The spinning ax bit into his own skin. The weapon betrayed the owner.

Zark's lifeless body sank to it's knees and Zeph's position in the battle switched from winning, to a desperate struggle for life. A Goron was about to have the finishing blow on the Zora- if a knife hadn't shot out of nowhere and hit the giant rock-creature in the neck.

Rutabaga and 21 burst down at them and cut them down to size.

"Pick on someone your own size, muscle head!" 21 yelled as she kicked one in the crotch. When it bent over in pain, she said "See? Now we're the same height!" Then Rutabaga shoved the Goron with his elbow, and it fell into a group of it's teammates.

Then the teenager with amnesia dived over the few remaining Gorons (about ten or so) and shot about four of them with his throwing knives. Each one found it's target deep in the neck. When he landed on the other side of the group, Rutabaga sliced two with his standard daggers.

21 looked at him briefly, smiled, then got back in the fight thinking:

_He might be a pain in the neck to play cards with, but he's sure one hell of a warrior!_

The three (Zeph got up) finished off the attackers.

"Thank Din." 21 said. "I could have sworn that we were all goners for a moment there."

"Don't let up just yet." Rutabaga advised. "There are only three of us yet. The Goron army isn't going to just give up this base. They may never-_will never_ have a chance like this again. They get through here, hundreds of thousands of Zora will die. They're going to send another 200+ at us. I know how to take them down, though. But I need you to get as far away from here as possible."

"Wait, what? No! Whatever we have to face, we face together."

"Yeah."

"Trust me on this!"  
"No!" 21 said, too loudly.

Rutabaga grabbed her wrist, looked her in the eye, and said:

"Trust me."

21 hesitated.

"Come on, Zeph. We have to run. There's about an hour at most before they arrive with reinforcements. Let's try to warn the Zora's domain that the Gorons are coming."  
Zeph peeled off some of his heavy armor and nodded.

"Let's go."  
About half way out, 21 asked Rutabaga:

"No self-sacrifices?"

"No self sacrifices."

And she left.

/

The base was in the shape of a square, and had a hallway all around. (Those of you who play Legend of Zelda, WW, picture Forsaken fortress- just with

A) A ceiling over the middle,

2)No lights were on the watch-towers

C)Remember that giant ship on the top of the highest point? It's not there.

\

The Goron soldiers marched into the middle of the base, where, no doubt, the last few Zora killers would be.

They weren't there.

"I guess they ran away."

"So the base is ours again?"  
"I guess."

"21?" Rutabaga whispered through a gossip stone.

"Yes?" She whispered back.

"Remember what I said about no sacrifices?"

"Yes..."

Then he said loudly "I lied."  
While the Gorons turned their heads, He dived over them to a giant box full of dynamite , bombs, and other explosives, and lit a match in his hand.

He almost made it, too.

Almost.

One Goron with lightning-fast reflexes shot him down with a crossbow.

"Do we take prisoners?" Asked one Goron.

"I... … … Don't... ..." And Rutabaga, the man with no memory, lit the box.

Right as he did that, a bird, about the size of a cucco, flew into him.

/

Rutabaga woke up. He felt... rejuvenated. Like he had all the energy in the world.

His doctor, a beautiful female Zora with wings, said:  
"Oh. So you finally woke up."

Another angel-looking thing walked into the room.

"Come on. You have people waiting."  
"But I'm..." Rutabaga gestured to his body under the blanket.

The new angel laughed while the doctor left. He tossed him a toga.

"You're kidding me, right?"

"Hey, if you don't want to wear it, that's okay. But it's either this suite, or your birthday suite."  
"Turn around." He grumbled, and put on the weird looking toga.

"You can call me Uiod, by the way." The angel who handed him the clothes said.

"I'm Rutabaga."

"Not for long. Come on."

Uiod led Rutabaga down a long hallway and into a dark room.

"Okay, Nyru. I brought him. Just like you said: blowing up most of a base with over 200 Gorons inside. What a way to go. Rutabaga, rightful King of the Zora, meet the Goddess of love: Nyru."

\

A/N

/

Starlll: I've been planning that for a long time.

Silicon: I know- wait... how he died or what happened after he died?

Starlll: Both. Hey, why don't you tell us how your adventure ended?

Silicon: Okay! Just as a recap, I was at Lostwonder13's house, and Brian the Owl just stopped a criminal.

\

Flashback!!!

/

Silicon: Okay, Lostwonder13! You took away my moment, now I'll take care of **you**!!

Stabby Larry the Mugger: Yeah! (Cocks a giant gun.)

Lostwonder13: Wait! Maybe we could work something out!

Silicon: It's too late...

Stabby Larry: (Fires his gun, which launches a bunch of coupons.) Wait... what?

Silicon: I saved all these coupons to pay for the vacation that I want you to go on! A spa! A couple of people will take care of you, and maybe you'll let me have another moment!

Lostwonder13: Okay...?

Brian: We went all that way for this?!  
(Moment of silence)

Stabby Larry: How are we going to get back?  
Silicon: (Shrugs) (To Stabby Larry) You still got that cap gun?

\

Later:

/

(Silicon stops a car, and Brian quietly takes off the license plates)

Stabby Larry: (Puts the fake gun up to the window) Get out of the (Bleep) car!! (Bleep) Get (Bleep) OUT!! (Bleep) (Bleep)!! (Silicon pulls the driver out)

Silicon: (driving away with Stabby Larry and Brian) DON'T CALL THE (Bleep) COPS!!

\

Silicon: And that's how it ended.


	21. The Unexpected Visitors

A/N

Starlll: God, I hate myself for taking so long to update.

Mudd: Don't worry. Everybody has something that they hate about themselves.

Starlll: I guess.

Mudd: But all you hate about yourself is that you take long to update?! I mean, you think you're _so_ perfect! What is wrong with you!?  
Starlll: Well... I'm forgetful, VUP, I play too many video games, and most of the school hates me.

Mudd: Okay, that's better.

Silicon: Can we play SSB?  
BTM: (Who will be returning this chapter) Alright.

/

Later:

\

Starlll: (Playing as Marth) Olas mase'l! (DIE!!)

BTM: What?  
Silicon: He talks in Altean when he plays as Marth.

BTM: Oh...

Starlll: Talese malous affel forratil olosin man-skirt! (Take this, guy with a man skirt!)

BTM: (Playing as Link) Hey! That's an old joke!

Silicon: Not as old as yo mama!!

BTM: (Glares at Silicon.)

Silicon: HELP!! (Runs for his life.)

/

Recap: If you totally forgot, read the recap chapter.

What's happened since then: Mudd, Hero, and Midna traveled through a desert (once occupied by Grudeos) in order to make it to a Zora base. On their way there, they met a giant Goron who calls himself 'Mr. E'. Mr. E joined their forces, and they attacked the base. With difficulty, they succeed. But since then, Mr. E seemed to feel in debt to Mudd for some reason.

Oh, yeah, and a boy and a girl, (Sothe and Micaiah) found an empty base, and are now living there.

\

Mudd and Midna where alone in a room. Mudd was holding Midna, and she had her head nestled against his shoulder.

"So, a Hylian and a Twilight..."

"Yeah..."

"I have wanted this from the moment I met you."

Their lips were a fraction apart when:

Midna woke up from her dream.

"What just happened?" She asked herself. She then muttered something about needing to get out more, and fell back asleep.

/

That morning:

\

Mr. E was packing up the supplies that they had stolen from the base the group had just destroyed. He lugged the 70 pound pack over his shoulder with ease, then woke up Hero, Midna, and Mudd.

_He looks so much like him._

/

At Mudd/Midna/Mr. E/Hero's base:

\

Mr. E held a gold rupee to the one small window of his room, checking for the millionth time (I'm not exaggerating, it probably was the millionth time.) if it was fake.

And for the millionth time, he got his answer.

It was fake. Glass.

But then he felt a small spark in the back of his head. It wasn't the spark that went of when he went berserker, but something else. It turned cold, then warm, then back to a spark again, going in that cycle.

"It's very rude," The gigantic Goron advised. "To read a person's mind without asking first."  
Mr. E's hand shot out and grabbed the teenage girl by the throat.

She had white hair, a blue-ish scarf, and a red shirt. Micaiah.

"Stay away from her!" Another teenager yelled. He shot a throwing dagger at Mr. E that got lodged in between his two shoulder blades. The Goron threw Micaiah across the room, and into the stone wall. Then, he punched the male teenager in the jaw, knocking him flat out unconscious.

The Goron grabbed the two by their shirts, and dropped them in Mudd's room.

"This one tried to read my mind, and then this one..." Mr. E pulled the dagger out of his back, hardly even blinking. "Got that in me."

"Let's get them downstairs. We'll keep them restrained until we can ask them a few questions."

Mr. E picked the dagger back up and threw it at the dart board Rutabaga gave Mudd.

Bullseye.

/

_Rutabaga woke up. He felt... rejuvenated. Like he had all the energy in the world._

_His doctor, a beautiful female Zora with wings, said:  
"Oh. So you finally woke up."_

_Another angel-looking thing walked into the room._

"_Come on. You have people waiting."  
"But I'm..." Rutabaga gestured to his body under the blanket._

_The new angel laughed while the doctor left. He tossed him a toga._

"_You're kidding me, right?"_

"_Hey, if you don't want to wear it, that's okay. But it's either this suite, or your birthday suite."  
"Turn around." He grumbled, and put on the weird looking toga._

"_You can call me Uiod, by the way." The angel who handed him the clothes said._

"_I'm Rutabaga."_

"_Not for long. Come on."_

_Uiod led Rutabaga down a long hallway and into a dark room._

"_Okay, Nyru. I brought him. Just like you said: blowing up most of a base with over 200 Gorons inside. What a way to go. Rutabaga, rightful King of the Zora, meet the Goddess of love: Nyru."_

\

"Wait... what did you just call me?" Rutabaga asked Uiod.

"It's polite to bow when you meet a goddess." Uiod said.

"Wait, what are you talking about-"

Uiod punched Rutabaga in the stomach and he bent over in pain, giving the illusion that he was bowing.

"It is not kind to do that to a guest, Kravar."

"My name isn't Kravar." Uiod grumbled. "I have three names. Kolako for when I'm in the Twilight realm, Uiod for when I'm in Hyrule, and Solo."

"And how many times must I remind you that you real name and nickname have both been taken, and now I refer to you as Kraver, he who craves."

"Ex-excuse me for interrupting, oh mighty and holy Goddess, but where in Din... uh... just, where am I?"

"You're in Limbo. We take some of the greatest fighters and warriors that have been seen, and train them further to be angels. _Kraver_ here is our absolute best-which he sometimes takes for granted."

"So am I dead?"

Uiod/Kraver/Kolako/Solo answered this time:

"Your body is, but your soul isn't. Check out your elbows, you're growing wings already." Rutabaga held up his arms and where his Zora-fins should have been were two sleek sliver wings. "Come on. I'll show you where to go when you don't have an assignment."

Uiod/Kraver/Kolako/Solo grabbed Rutabaga's arm (careful not to damage any of the sprouting wings) and dived over a cloud into the sky.

/

It had been at least four hours before Sothe woke up, and Micaiah was up along with him. Mudd was waiting next to the boy, while Midna was by the girl. Sothe had instantly grabbed for his knife, but Mudd stopped his hand.

"Tell us who you are and why you're here." Mudd demanded.

"I'll tell you when a horse-"

"I'm Micaiah and that's Sothe, my friend. We were traveling when we found this base. We thought it was abandoned."

"Well, as long as you swear to never tell ANYONE where this base is, we can let you leave."

Before they could answer, Hero burst in yelling:

"A group of Gorons are coming this way!"

"Oh Ashera. Those must have been the ones chasing us." Sothe said gravely.

Mudd tossed him a knife.

"Well, let's hope you can fight." He muttered.

\

A/N

/

Starlll: So, BTM is updating again? HORRAY! HORRAY! YAAY! Oh wait. I said in the beginning that he would be put back into the story. Dang!

\

BTM the tact ion planned out a map for an upcoming battle.

And and if it succeeds, the last one.

/

A/N

\

Starlll: There. Kind of a cliffhanger. The Zora are planning out the last battle. There will be a few chapters before that happens, though. But it's coming, so get ready for the big battle.

BTM: I am.


	22. A Larger Group

A/N

Starlll: Happy Author's week, everybody!  
Silicon: What's author's week?  
Starlll: It's a week of nonstop writing!

Silicon: Wait... you said that Author's week started a week ago.

Starlll: Yeah, but then we got all mixed up in Christmas and presents and stuff. Which reminds me, BTM (The only guy reading this), I got Legend of Zelda, PH!

BTM: Awesome!  
Starlll: Yeah! Now when you're writing your story, I'll actually understand it! Anyway, I hope you enjoy the following chapter!

Silicon: Wait!

Starlll: What?  
Silicon: Well, first off, you've been using way too many exclamation points. And second, shouldn't we make this Author's Notes a bit longer, so the chapter looks longer?  
Starlll: That's a good idea. Now, onto the story!!

Silicon: Wait, but I thought-

/

For those who have forgotten: Rutabaga just met Uiod (who is now not guarding Mudd), who is showing him around an angel training program thing.

Also: Mudd Midna and Mr. E just 'met' (and by met I mean found) Sothe and Micaiah (Hero was standing guard at the time, so he still hasn't been introduced to them). Micaiah apparently used some mind thing to read Mr. E's mind, and then Mr. E nearly put the two into hospital beds.

Now the fort is being attacked by Gorons, and Micaiah and Sothe have to help defend the base, along with the rest of the fighters.

\

Death is an unusual thing. It is brought on by fights and by wagers, never knowing how it will lead up. Some find it easy as one flick of the wrist, while some vomit at the thought. But it is agreed upon with one thing:

Losing one life in cold blood is more difficult than killing many in the fury of battle.

That is why in this battle, Mudd and Hero knew they had to kill every Goron, for they couldn't afford to keep hold on any more prisoners.

Killing the Gorons was very hard for Hero. He had been raised by Gorons, and had fought alongside them. So, as hard as it was to kill them, Hero knew it would be harder than killing them in cold blood.

/

The six slowly strode back into the fort. Micaiah began to heal herself with a few herbs. Sothe continued to stay pokerfaced at the group, Mudd cleaned his broadsword, and Hero passed out on the couch.

"You can leave any time you like." Mudd said. To most it would have been an insult, but to Micaiah and Sothe, they knew it was a kind offer.

But instead of getting up to leave, Micaiah asked:

"So you're Zora, then?" Mudd gave her a puzzled face, and she explained: "You live in a base, you just killed a group of Gorons without blinking, and your armor is made from a Zora."

"Mostly correct, but no cigar. We aren't Zora, but we aren't Goron either. We're protesters against the war. We've been taking down random bases and supply shops, hoping that it will at least postpone the war, and give them a chance for diplomacy."

Micaiah hesitated.

"If you want your plan to work, you're going to need as much help as you can get. May we join you?"

Sothe instantly stood up in surprise, but Mudd had a feeling that she was going to ask that.

"You guys were pretty good in that fight. It's like you said, we need all the help we can get. You may join us."

\

Mr. E was making breakfast. Random pieces of meat and toast to be specific. Whether that was all that was left to make, or all he _could_ make, Mudd was never exactly sure. But it tasted good enough, and it didn't kill him, so Mudd didn't care.

Midna and Micaiah refused to eat it, as they were vegetarians, and just took some of the toast. Hero bit down on the meat like a wolf (mostly because he was one), and chomped down on it vigorously.

"Okay, here's the new plan:" Mudd said, bending over a map of Hyrule. "We're going to hit three major supply camps. No bases this time, we're trying to keep casualties to a minimum. We're going to split up into two groups. Hero, Sothe, and Micaiah, you're in group number 1. Mr. E, Midna, and I will be on team 2. Group 1 will go through the northeast highways, and avoid all contact with other people. You will stop at a small village to restock on supplies. But make sure that it isn't very close to Death Mountain or any other Goron encampments. You'll hit these supply shops here," Mudd pointed to an area on the map. "And here.'

'Team 2 will go through Oradon and attack these three smaller supply stores. These ones supply the Zora army directly, and will do quite a bit of damage. Any questions?"

There was a moment of silence, and then Micaiah asked:

"If the supply camps you will attack supply the Zora army directly, then won't they be closely guarded?"

"They would have you think that. But you see, the Zora spread out their army more than the Gorons, so the supply camps aren't very well protected. I remember when I was in the army, we were often attacked by pirates." Mudd explained.

"Okay, let's go."

/

They were about to leave, when Mudd caught up to Hero.

"Hey, Hero!" Mudd called.

"What?" Hero asked, slowing down. He was packing for the advancement.

"I think you should tell Sothe and Micaiah about you being a werewolf. Midna isn't in your group, so she can't control you when you lose your mind to blood. Be careful."

Hero saw the wisdom to Mudd's words and continued to pack.

\

Uiod brought Rutabaga to a training room. He knocked on a door and a voice called out.

"Whatith is the word for pass?" Asked an old English-y voice.

"Come on, why do we even need a password? We're past the cloud line, people can't even _see_ us!"

"Whatith is the word for pass?" The voice continued.

"2010 A.D." Uiod grumbled.

"And now tell why that is the word for pass."

"Because that is when humanity will be overrun by aliens I a nuclear war."

Instead of replying, the door swung open. The voice was a tall angel, with long black raven hair. He had a giant broadsword slung across his back, longer than most grown men.

"Cometh hither. I spy another angel. What be thy name?"

Rutabaga was about to respond, but Uiod answered:

"He doesn't have one, yet. This is the rightful king of the Zora, though."

"Wait!" Rutabaga said, stopping Uiod. "Will you just tell me what you mean when you keep calling me the rightful king?"

"I'm sorry. I thought that you would understand. Anyway, when I say that you are the rightful king, I meant that you should have been the king by right. Now, I have to go. Later." Uiod dived out of the door and through the atmosphere.

/

Starlll: And the end to another chapter.

Silicon: Yay!

Starlll: The pack grows a bit, but we still don't know much about Mr. E.

Mudd: Yeah. And where we met him was a bit unorthodox.

BTM: I'll say.  
Starlll: Anyway, I'd like to raise a topic nobody every discussed: Who bit Hero? I mean, it's not like I'd just make a werewolf and not bring in a whole pack of them.

Hero: Well, I think that it was-

Starlll: HERO! When I _want_ your opinion, I'll ask for it.

Hero: Jerk.

Starlll: What was that? (Lights his light saber.)

Hero: I said that you look very handsome today, sir. Nice mask, sir. I'm going to do the disclaimer, sir.

\

Disclaimer: Starlll owns Mr. E, Mudd, and Rutabaga. Hero belongs to Nintendo 64, Sothe, Micaiah, and all others belong to Nintendo and all it's glory.

/

HAPPY NEW YEAR!! (I'm actually posting this when the ball drops!)


	23. The TwentyThird Chapter

A/N

Starlll: Oh... my... god.

Silicon: (Happy) What is it?

Starlll: (Holds up his Nintendo DS, the game Pokemon Pearl inside) I just caught a munchlax...

Silicon: A MUNCHLAX!?! OH MY GOD!! HOW DID YOU FIND IT?!?! SHOW ME SHOW ME SHOW ME-

Starlll: Okay, well, I'm not sure if it'll work again-

Silicon: Tell me!

Starlll: Okay, if you-

(Loud explosion)

Starlll: AUGH!!  
BTM707: (Holding a rocket launcher with Mudd attached) Okay, if you don't write the next chapter of His Name is Mudd, your friend is going on a little trip...

Starlll: AUGH!!  
BTM: Is that a yes?  
Starlll:(Pointing at BTM) AUGH!!

BTM: What?  
Starlll: (Points to a monster behind BTM) Augh.

BTM: (Sees the monster) AUGH!!

Monster: (Eats BTM) Burp. (Crawls away.)

Starlll: Was that the cause of my new Munchlax?!

Pearson: What do you mean by that?  
Starlll: Munchlaxes eat. A lot. Do you think that the monster that ate BTM was my new Munchlax's spirit of eating, come to haunt me? It was! I know! I'll release my new pokemon! (Clicks on the 'release' button, but it doesn't work) AUGH! I know! Maybe the Pokemon can only be released in the place in which it was spawned! To the Pokemon world!

Silicon: Did you really just figure that out in three lines?

Starlll: Yup! Now let's go-o-o-o-o!

/

Disclaimer: Lemme see... I own Mudd, Uiod, Clukko, and Rutabaga, Hero belongs to Nintendo 64, and everybody else belongs to Nintendo.

\

_Uiod brought Rutabaga to a training room. He knocked on a door and a voice called out._

"_Whatith is the word for pass?" Asked an old English-y voice._

"_Come on, why do we even need a password? We're past the cloud line, people can't even see us!"_

"_Whatith is the word for pass?" The voice continued._

"_2010 A.D." Uiod grumbled._

"_And now tell why that is the word for pass."_

"_Because that is when humanity will be overrun by aliens I a nuclear war."_

_Instead of replying, the door swung open. The voice was a tall angel, with long black raven hair. He had a giant broadsword slung across his back, longer than most grown men._

"_Cometh hither. I spy another angel. What be thy name?"_

_Rutabaga was about to respond, but Uiod answered:_

"_He doesn't have one, yet. This is the rightful king of the Zora, though."_

"_Wait!" Rutabaga said, stopping Uiod. "Will you just tell me what you mean when you keep calling me the rightful king?"_

"_I'm sorry. I thought that you would understand. Anyway, when I say that you are the rightful king, I meant that you should have been the king by right. Now, I have to go. Later." Uiod dived out of the door and through the atmosphere._

/

Rutabaga looked at the angel who guarded the door, and asked him a few questions, such as what this place was, if he was in heaven, and why the hell he was growing wings.

Now, don't forget, the guard spoke in an old English accent, so it was hard to decipher what the man/being of light said.

But never the less, he learned that he was one of the few selected by the goddesses themselves to keep the world in one place. Apparently, the were supposed to guard those who would shape the world most from death.

After learning many of the questions, the winged-man got annoyed, and told him to get back to training.

"Okay. But just one more question?"  
"Fine. But so longith as tis your last."

"Alright. Why can't we keep our names? Uiod... or whatever his name was, had three names. Why don't we get to keep using names?"  
"A name is the last thing tying us to the world of the mortals. By saying it, we can be pulled back in and no longer use our power. Then we die. So, we recreate different terms of address."

Rutabaga nodded.

"Any idea what mine would be?"

"That all depends on personality traits, appearance, and tasks done during life."

Rutabaga nodded again, and went back to training.

\

Mudd, Midna, and Mr. E traveled through the Oradon forest. Midna waited patiently in Mr. E's shadow while Mudd rode on Gale, with Clukko on his shoulder. Mr. E had rolled into a ball and rolled like a giant boulder rolled down a mountain.

Mudd couldn't help but grin while traveling through the forest. He saw a tree he carved his enishals into when he was 12 on his left. A rock he spent months trying to lift when he was 9 on his right. A lake he used to wash Gale in. The river he swam in before the war.

Needless to say, they were catching up to the place Mudd grew up in.

The forest starting to get thinner, and they were nowhere near Oradon. The birds weren't chirping, and the small animals were gone. Two years of war screamed that there were enemies nearby. Mudd would have believed that, too.

But then he smelled it.

Ash, dryness, decay.

There was a wildfire.

Mudd stop his horse to look around. The trees were black and charred. The grass was gone, singed to the very roots, and leaves and bark was crumbled into the ground. This wasn't the forest he grew up in. This wasn't the forest he grew up in. Dammit, it wasn't the forest he grew up in

/

"You're feeling pretty bad, aren't you?" Midna asked Mudd that night, sympathetically. They had decided to camp out under a small tent, a small ways away from the gigantic burnt down forest.

"Of course I am!" Mudd yelled. "I lost half of the place where I grew up in! I can't even begin to describe how bad this is!"

The man closed his eyes, trying to sleep. Normally, with a giant like Mr. E they would never have all been able to fit into the small tent. So, Mr. E volunteered to take the first watch. And the next one. And the one after that. When the Goron slept, they didn't know. But they weren't about to complain, either.

"Sorry. I know you're a bit moody right now. Who wouldn't be?" Midna said. "Just trying to make you feel better, that's all."

Mudd mumbled something then stuck his head under his pillow.

\

"Wake up." Mr. E said, poking his head into the tent.

/

"Who lives in Oradon?" Mr. E asked Mudd.

"Let's see..." Mudd thought, rubbing his chin. "There are a few kids named Malo, Talo, Beth, and Colin... their parents who's names escape me... Rusl (the guy who raised me), Bo (the mayor), and his daughter, Ilia. Din, I hope I can avoid her."

"Whys that?" Midna asked, concerned for reasons which she wouldn't have been able to answer if you asked her then.

"She stalked me for two years, then when I took her on a pity date, she started to plan our 'marriage'." Mudd said, explaining the incredibly annoying girl in one breath.

"Ah." Midna answered. She could tell Mudd was still shaken by the forest fire, but was getting better. "So, tell me more about Rusl."

"Rusl? He raised me. Never actually told me about my real parents, though. He was a good guy. Taught me how to use a sword and got me Gale as a present for my 15th birthday. Tall, skinny, and usually has a short sword at his waist."

And finally, they made it to Oradon.

\

Starlll: Ha! I'm gonna be a jerk and not show you what happens in Oradon until the next chapter! Yeah, I'm mean like that.

Silicon: So, we should be getting closer to the Pokemon world, master!

Pearson: Remind me why I joined you.

Starlll: Cuz we're friends!  
Pearson: No we are not.

Starlll: (Pats him on the back) Quite a sense of humor! That's good in a friend!

(Long moment of silence)

Silicon: Why haven't we ended the chapter yet?  
Starlll: I want to round it off to a full 5 pages.

Pearson: Is that the door the Pokemon world? (Points to a door)

Starlll: I think it is! You see, this friendship is benefiting alrea-(opens the door, and on the other side is a brick wall stopping them reading 'HAHAHAHAHAHAHA')-dy.

Silicon: Dead end.

Pearson: Remind me why I joined you imbeciles again.

Starlll: Cuz we're friends!

Silicon: F IS FOR FRIENDS WHO DO STUFF TOGETHER!! U IS FOR YOU AND ME! N IS FOR NY(ANY)WHERE AT ANY TIME AT ALL, DOWN HERE IN THE GREAT BLUE SEA!!

(Longer moment of silence than the last one)

Pearson: How much longer until the page is finished?

Starlll: 5 lines.

Silicon: Yay!

Starlll: Wanna play go fish?!

Silicon: (excited) You have any threes?

Pearson: He hasn't even dealt out the deck ye-

Starlll: (Covers Pearson's mouth) Go fish!


	24. The Annoyance

A/N

/

Starlll: (Mumble) I'm so tired...

Silicon: Let's keep going.

Starlll: (Asleep) No, I won the competition.

Silicon: What?  
Pearson: He's dreaming.

Starlll: Because I sold more cookies than you.

Silicon: Are you dreaming that you're a girl scout?

Starlll: No, troop 137.

Pearson: Wanna see him dreaming that he's a hippopotamus?

Silicon: Yeah!

Pearson: (Shrinks to the size of an ant, crawls into Starlll's ear, waits a while, then crawls out and returns to normal size) Done.

Starlll: (Loud hippo roar) MARARAROOROOAWR!!

Silicon: Nice. Anyway, I think that we're getting closer to the Pokemon world!

Pearson: Yes. We just open this door, (Opens a door leading to a tunnel, but on the other side of the door is a brick wall, with the words '(Censored) you Pokemon') and then we drill through this wall, then we're there.

Starlll: (Loud hippo roar) MARARAROOROOAWR!!

Silicon: How do we get through?

Pearson: We call my pet Aggoron.

Silicon: How?

Starlll: (Loud hippo roar) MARARAROOROOAWR!!

Pearson: Simple: Come here, Aaron.

Silicon: You named you Aggoron Aaron? I doubt he heard you-

Aaron: (Breaks down the wall and roars) RO-OO-AA-AR!!

Silicon: Impressive. I can't wait to see my Pokemon again!

\

Note from the author:

BTM, I know, you forget whats going on, so let me explain simply:

Mudd betrayed the Zora to end the war!

Rutabaga died, died, and died some more!

Now he's an angel,

Because he's sick of life's bull!

Hero and Midna left the army,

Joined Mudd and... uh... well, what did you expect from Hero's rhyme? Something intelligent? He's still a werewolf, and he's on a trip through the desert with Sothe and Michiah, and will meet up with Mudd, Midna, and Mr. E (the giant giant Goron), who are on a path that are through Oradon, both groups are going to sabotage a few Zora and Goron encampments and resources along the way.

/

"Are we there yet?" Hero whined as he, Michaiah, and Sothe hiked through the desert.

"No!" Sothe yelled.

"But I have to go to the bathroom!"

Michaiah glared at Hero.

"Then why didn't you go before we _left_?!" She yelled.

"I didn't have to go then!"

"GAA-AA-AAH!!" Sothe shouted, covering his hands with his face.

"I'll be right back." Hero said, running behind a rock.

/

"Hey, Sothe! You wanna play a game?" Hero asked.

"No." He grumbled.

"Come on!"

"No."  
"I'll give to 50 rupees if you win!" Hero offered. That got Sothe's attention, and he looked up, so he explained: "Okay, one person will ask the other a question, and is the person doesn't know the answer, they pay the winner 50 rupees! We keep playing until one person gets a question wrong."

"Okay. Can you tell me Seltzers property of a bows sling?"

"Nope. And technically, your question was actually asking me if I _could_, and I answered right, I don't owe you a dime!"

"Fine." Sothe grumbled.

"Okay, what has three legs going up, and one leg going to the side?" Hero asked.

Sothe grumbled, and gave him 50 rupees. There was a long moment of silence, then Sothe asked:

"Well? What was it?"

Hero shrugged.

"The game's over. I don't owe you a dime for not knowing the answer."

/

"I'm hu-u-u-u-u-u-ungry." Hero whined. "Let's eat."

"Fine." Michaiah mumbled. "We have some more trail mix left."

"I ate it."

"...There's still sandwiches." She suggested.

"I ate them."

"The bread?"

"Ate it."

"The vegetables?"  
"Ate some of it, then fed the rest to a cute little bunny."

Sothe glared at him.

"Bunny?! We're in the middle of the DESERT!!"

"Bunny, rat," Hero shrugged. "I have a slight astigmatism."

"THAT WAS ALL THE FOOD WE BROUGHT!!" Sothe shouted.

"No. We still have that steak." Hero explained.

"I'm a vegetarian." Michaiah explained.

"Whoa, you know, a few months ago, I've never even heard of Vegetarianism before, but now I see it everywhere I go! Man, that must be one of the fastest growing religions in the world!" Hero exclaimed.

"It's not a RELIGION, it just means that I don't eat meat."

"I know." Hero said. "Because it's a religious practice, right? It's the same reason why during church, we get lulled to sleep, and the longer you can stay awake, you get to eat bread and maybe wine if you stay awake long enough!"

"And I won't eat if she can't." Sothe added, confused as to how the man in front of him managed to not get run out of town by an angry mob yet.

Hero shrugged and lit a fire.

/

"That was great." Hero said, patting his belly after he had eaten his steak.

\

"Clovers and daisies, cotton-tails too..." Hero sang, as they traveled through the desert the next day.

"I say we jump him." Sothe suggested, putting his hand on his dagger.

"How can **one** man be so annoying..." Michaiah asked, putting a hand over her face. "My Goddess. I have never wanted to kill anyone in my entire life in cold blood... but this guy... after two days..."

Sothe nodded. "So jump him on three? I want my rupee back."

/

"Anyone want a sandwich?" Hero asked, pulling three sandwiches out of his pocket.

"I thought you ate all of the sandwiches!" Sothe exclaimed.

"Yeah. I forgot that I had these in my pocket!" Hero explained.

"Why did you keep them in your... you know what? Never mind. Just give me mine."

"Okay!" Hero began walking over to Michaiah and Sothe to give them sandwiches.

"There is no way he could mess this one up..." Sothe said.

"Whoops!!" Hero shouted as he tripped, and all three sandwiches went up in the air, and landed in his mouth.

"I stand corrected."

\

"Ssh..." Hero whispered. "I see a cat!"

"Wait, no!" Michaiah called as Hero reached out to pet him. "It's bad luck when a black cat crosses your path!"

A record in the background screeched to a halt.  
"Wait, just a black cat?" He asked. "JUST the black ones? My goddess, that it just plain racist, ma'am! Why, never in my life have I met one who would discriminate another so badly! Why, just telling me to avoid another creature just because it is black? Why, we don't know anything about this creature! Why, maybe this poor, discriminated animal will be our salvation!" Hero picked up the black cat. "Why, this wonderful, beautiful animal is one of the most sacred creatures I have ever seen- **OUCH!!**" Hero suddenly screamed as the cat bit his hand, then proceeded to claw the flesh off of his face.

"Lucky cat..." Sothe grumbled. "I wanted to do that..."

/

"I still say it was unfair to judge it because of it's fur color..." Hero grumbled as he put a giant X-shaped bandage on his forehead.

\

"Alright." Sothe said. It was dark out, and they had finally found the Goron outpost. "Now, Michaiah, you're going to create a distraction using your light magic, and we'll start a fire on the other side. It'll cause minimal casualties while destroying their supplies-"

"BORING!!" Hero shouted. He then pulled a crossbow out of his pocket, lit a crossbow bolt on fire, then shot it at the camp. There was an explosion, and the camp was destroyed in a blazing inferno.

"What. Was. That?" Hero's two traveling companions asked.

"Well," Hero explained. "I'm such an idiot that it worked."  
There was a long moment of silence.

"And?"

"Nope, that's it."

Sothe hesitated. "But-"  
"That's it!"

"But how did-"  
"That's all!"

"But-"

"I said that's it!!"

/

A/N

Starlll: (Loud hippo roar) MARARAROOROOAWR!!

Silicon: Okay, I was funny at first, but now it's getting old.

Pearson: Yes. One moment. (Crawls into Starlll's ear, Starlll wakes up, and Pearson crawls out)  
Starlll: (Blinks) What did I miss?

Silicon: We're in the Pokemon world!

Starlll: Ooh! Man, I wish BTM was here to see this!

Pearson: Didn't BTM warn you that he would kill one of your O.C.'s if you did not bring him back into the story?  
Starlll: Yes. He did.  
Pearson: That was rhetorical.

(Long moment of silence)

Silicon: So won't you bring him back?

Starlll: No. He tricked me and worried me half to death that he was ending his story, so I'm not putting him back in until he says he's sorry.

\

YOU HERE ME, WORLD?!! NO MORE UPDATES UNTIL THAT KID FROM CANADA SAYS HE'S SORRY!!


	25. Returning Home

A/N

/

Starlll: God, it's been forever since I last updated. Oh well, best get writing.

Mudd: Hey, you know what's stupid?  
Starlll: Twilight?  
Mudd: Yeah. Seriously, what happened to those old vampires? The ones who actually WERE monsters? I mean, they covered the whole 'gentle giant' thing in:

A) Beauty and the Beast  
B) The Grinch  
C) Young Frankenstein  
D) REAL Frankenstein

E) The Hunchback of Notordame

Starlll: Yeah. Get a new plot line. And you know what else? It's about 17-year old hot guys making out, and a lot of middle-age women read it. IF THIS WAS MIDDLE-AGE GUYS READING ABOUT 17-year old GIRLS, someone would call THE DANG COPS!

Mudd: Yeah. And you know what else? It's impossible for Edward to get Bella pregnant! I mean, if vampires are that old, they would have gotten so many sexual diseases over the years, that Bella would have died within hours!

Starlll: Yeah! Freaky. You know, Edward should have just killed Jacob and got it over with.

Mudd: Yeah, that would have been EPIC! And- wait, what? Jacob would totally beat Edward!

Starlll: Are you kidding me? Edward's skin is as strong as a rock!

Mudd: Jacob is STRONGER than a rock!

Starlll: You take that back! (Stands up)

Mudd: Make me! (Stands up)

Starlll: I will! (Lunges at Mudd)

(The two start wrestling on the floor)

BTM: (Walking in) What are you two fighting about?

(Long moment of silence)  
Both: Football!

\

Disclaimer: I don't own Hero, Legend of Zelda, or Microsoft. Bill gates owns Microsoft. Jerk. What's wrong with him, he doesn't even give the company or ONE scrap of data to his number one fan! I ask him for some charity, something small for his number 1 fan, but NO! No, even though I spend ALL DAY admiring Microsoft, Bill Gates gives me NOTHING in return! Seriously, where does that guy get off doing that? I want something from him. I want some of that cash. **Sniff** But I don't get any...

/

**A Quick Reminder of where we are:**

In a nutshell, Mudd and Hero (and Midna) teamed up to go renegade a few chapters ago, soon after Rutabaga died. Rutabaga is in a type of heaven now, as an angel. Three people have joined Mudd and Hero's team of renegades: Sothe, the rouge thief, Michaiah, the light mage, and Mr. E, the mysterious behemoth of a Goron.

Mudd, Mr. E, and Midna went south, taking a path that would lead them through Oradon (Mudd's home town), and were supposed raid and destroy a few Zora bivouacs along the way. Hero, Micaiah, and Sothe took a north path taking them through a desert, with a similar mission, except that the bivouacs they would attack belonged to Gorons.

The last chapter was of Hero's group, and was purely comic relief. Though they did destroy their first camp in the end (and though it is never mentioned, they destroy the other two on their path while Mudd's group goes through the events in this chapter), it had no real intent on moving the plot line forward.

Now that you're all caught up, enjoy!

\

"It's Oradon!" Mudd shouted, looking at his old village from a distance. "It's my home town!" Mudd started running as fast as he could down the hill he was on, to the small town of farmers and ranchers. He could practically taste the fresh Oradon pumpkins, the world-renowned Oradon goat cheese running down his throat...

Then he realized that Midna and Mr. E weren't following him.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"...I'm a freaking imp and he's a Din-damned giant who hasn't seen civilization in years. We weren't exactly made for the public."

It slowly dawned on Mudd that Midna was right.

"...Oh. I forgot..." He hesitated. "Well, Midna, you can just hide in my shadow for a while, and Mr. E, you can..." Mudd thought of a way to put what he was thinking of gently.

"Hide in the forest like a forlorn murderer, running from the law?" Mr. E suggested. That one sentence was probably the most he ever spoke at a single time throughout the entire journey.

"...Yeah." Mudd admitted. Mr. E just nodded to this confirmation and walked the other way of the village, and slowly merged with the tree line. Midna dove into his shadow as if it were a pool of murky black water.

Mudd smiled and headed off to Oradon. It seemed like for the first time since he took that fateful journey to deliver that shield once upon a time that he was actually alone.

He wasn't alone, of course, as Midna was still in his shadow, and could hear and see everything that went on around her while she was entombed in what was like a coffin in the shape of Mudd's shadow.

/

Mudd grinned when he walked into town. He wasn't riding on Gale, but walking alongside her. He smiled at a few people while he walked by, but he doubted that anybody really recognized him. He traveled along a dirt road, paved by people and animals walking over it, and no other foreign object. Mudd continued through, not stopping even to say hi to the village kids playing some ball game that he never learned the name to.

No, Mudd just kept walking along, nodding his head as if he had never left. There was about ten to fifteen minutes of this by the time Mudd finally made it to his destination. It was a small house that clearly lived only on the essentials. The very paint was peeling off of it (which used to be white, but now was steadily turning yellow), and he could see several areas in which mice could get in through if they weren't covered soon. Yet, in spite of all of the flaws, Mudd deeply inhaled through his nose and felt a deep, warm sense of home.

Mudd carefully opened the door. At first glance, one would think that this was so that he didn't accidentally tear the weak frame off of it's hinges. But Mudd knew that it was just so that he didn't make any noise. _The entire house may be falling apart,_ Mudd noted. _But the door is still oiled._

"Hey, Rusl, am I too late for lunch?" Mudd called in through the door, grinning ear-to-ear.

Mudd smiled while he heard footsteps rush out of a door and down some stairs. But the person inside wasn't Rusl. It was a woman.

"Rusl?" She repeated. "You mean the swordsman? No, he's been gone for months now. He enlisted in the Zora army. I'm just his house-sitter." She hesitated again, before musing, "Then again, there isn't much for me TO sit on in this house."

She was making fun of the lack of furniture. There were really only two beds, three chairs, and a table, but that still gave her no right to make fun of it.

"The army? Did he say why?" Mudd asked. He didn't like her already, but wanted answers.

"Well, he didn't actually say why, but the town says that it's because of the death of his adopted son, Mudd."

Like a slow moving glacier, finally touching him, the cold realization finally hit Mudd.

_I'm dead._ He thought. _They never heard from me when I got side-tracked in the army... they think I'm dead... I never wrote a letter to Rusl saying what happened... they think I'm dead... I kept putting it off, what with all of the missions and then Rutabaga lost his memory and I got moved to a different base and... they think I'm dead... I might as well be... I'm DEAD._

Mudd started to head for the door.

"Wait!" The woman called to him. "I never did get your name!"

Mudd hesitated. He was about to say Mudd, on instinct, but then thought of something else.

"Will." He said. "Will Spider."

\

Mudd, or, at least, Will Spider, the traveler, walked through the town with a new sense of freedom. Nothing he did or said would be put on his name. He smiled as he thought of this new false person. His personality, his 'story', his hometown... Mudd soon found that it was fun to make up people. And he found that it was even more fun to pretend to be them.

Will Spider was a traveler who came from the east, nearby Kakario, from a village named Talmer. Talmer actually did exist, but it was not nearly as vivid as Mudd/Will said it was.

"Oh, yes, I remember Talmer like I was just there yesterday. Ah, I remember how green the grass was every summer, growing up in the fields of corn. After the Spring flooding wore off, if would play in those fields." Mudd would say to the man or woman next to him, making it all up. "Some times I would spend entire nights just looking up at the star-filled skies, on my pillow of corn leaves. The stalks around me were the only blanket I needed. Then, come morning, I would watch the sun rise from west and set in the east. Often, when my mother would finally call me in, I would carry all sorts of strange rocks and bugs I would find. I will never forget the day when I first found my buddy here, Clukko." Upon saying the name, he would point to the cucco perched on his shoulder, which would give a few friendly 'cluck-cluck-cluck's. "He was just wandering around the riverbed, eating when he cared to, sleeping when he cared to, and swimming along the lazy river. He reminded me of myself right away, and I knew we would be friends until the end. My mother hated him, of course, but my father decided it was time for me to have a pet, and perhaps teach me some responsibility. Well, his plan backfired, as Clukko already found his own food and cleaned himself. The one thing I had to do was give him attention, which both of us loved." Will smiled at the fake memory. "Napping under the apple tree, climbing in it's branches, attempting to teach Clukko how to fly (and failing at it), swimming in the river, and drawing in the sand, I had the greatest childhood I could ask for." Will would now mention that he had to order something, but 'accidentally' would let it slip that he was out of money, so he would have to leave. The person he was telling the story to, of course, was so immersed in what he was saying that they would offer to pay FOR him, so please, don't leave. Will would thank them and go back to his life's story. "Ah yes, my childhood was wonderful, but as I grew older, to the age where most boys would think of girls and money and becoming some type of soldier, I only thought about seeing the world around me. To see where the sun's rising truly started, and where it actually ended. To float down to the end of that lazy river. To hunt for treasure. To kiss perfect strangers. I was captivated by the very thought of freedom. So, one day, I took nothing but Clukko, a backpack full of food, and the clothes on my back and began my journey."

It was here where Will would take a bite of his free food, and drink some of the warm Oradonian pumpkin cider. He smiled while he did this, leaning back as if his story was all over and relaxing. But no, the person he would talk to didn't want it to end so soon. He or she didn't want it to end at all. So, the person would ask Will questions about his journey.

'Where did you go first? Were you ever attacked? Where did you get your horse[Mudd had left Gale outside the cafe]? How did you get that awful scar on your cheek?'

Mudd smiled and made up new memories, explaining each one. He first traveled to Kakario, where he recited poetry to earn money. He spent this on food, fresh clothes, a pack of matches, and a knife. This had easily become his pattern, though Will would make up new poems whenever he felt the urge to. He recited one for the stranger:

_The Season have always turned,_

_from cold to warm to cold still._

_While in Winter the fire burned,_

_In Summer, one could feel the crops' till._

_So the seasons keep ending,_

_The warmth may help our crops,_

_But life is still tending,_

_To be a cycle which never stops._

The stranger whispered the poem back to Will, as if they were words of magic. Mudd smiled and continued.

He was once attacked by a street thief, who was after whatever money he had left from the last town he visited (which we far and few, as the great nature was better than any man-made place). The thief had disarmed Will of his knife, and was about to kill him where he stood when Clukko began pecking the thief where ever he could find flesh. Clukko had proved to be more than just a friend, but a hero.

The story of how he got Gale was by far the longest of all the sub-stories, far too long to fit into paragraphs alone. No, Gale's story would take up easily another chapter or two. To prevent this, here are the basic details:

Will had been traveling along through the fields when he saw a few men with a herd of horses. Some small, some large, some pack horses and some race horses. Black ones and white ones, brown ones, and even one that had brown hair, but splashes of white and black like a brown wall with paint thrown on it. He approached these men and asked what they were doing with all of these horses. They smiled kindly upon seeing that he was traveling without a horse, therefore he was a potential customer, and explained that they were horse-breeders. Will had been away from true civilization for quite some time now, so the idea of forcing horses to breed was disgusting to him. He rarely ate meat, and only did when he was sure the animal had died of natural standards. So the idea of forcing nature was just... wrong. But yet, he was still intrigued. So, he decided to buy a horse and become friends with it like he had with Clukko. However, he didn't have nearly enough money to pay for even their cheapest one, and they weren't about to give it to him for a poem unless it was another Odyssey, so he worked for them. Sometimes it was just as simple as getting some water 'from that stream over there', or sometimes it was as hard as tracking down a lost mare. Occasionally, when they went into a town to sell, he would advertise for them with his verses. They didn't ask for him to do that, so it was appreciated even greater. So anyway, with all of the work, three months of labor flew right by. He was awarded with a young horse, only about a year old, which they had named Gale, after the speed in which it could run like the wind. Will thanked the men and the went separate ways.

And, finally, Mudd would answer the question as to how he got the scar on his cheek.

"Oh yes, this one. Quite an interesting story, this scar is." He touched it, almost fondly. "It was late at night. I had ran out of matches, so Clukko and I (this was before I had gotten Gale) had to sleep in the dark. It was a cloudy night, so not even the stars could give us light. I curled up next to Clukko, afraid for some reason. I couldn't explain it, I just was. I always credit myself for being a tiny bit psychic, you see. Or maybe I just spend so much time outside, I know how it works. Either way, I knew something was out there. The suspense was so heart-stopping that I could have written a book about it, and it would knock anything that Stephen Prince wrote off of the charts. Sean Koontz would have wished that he had the ability to draw off of this raw emotion. I couldn't stop looking around, I couldn't stop rolling and tossing and turning. Something was hunting me, but I didn't know what (1). It couldn't have been a wolf, because then I would have heard the entire pack of them howling and running. It wasn't an owl, or a bird of prey, because I could hear a very, very faint rustling in the grass around me. I couldn't pin down where. But when I turned my head in the general direction of it, the sound was no longer there. Then I would be at ease. Then I would hear it again, somewhere else. Eventually, I just buried my head under Clukko, who was undisturbed by the entire thing, and tried to think of something other than swamp ghosts and demons.'

Then it attacked me. It used it's bare hands, scraping at me. It was so cold... so bony... I managed to get away, and grabbed my knife. I cut at it, and slashed at whatever was there. Then, it stopped. I could hear the rustling, but it was running away. I didn't have my knife anymore, either. I think I fell unconscious right about there from blood loss. I could taste it in my mouth. When I woke up, Clukko was sitting up against my cheek, covering the wound. I was lucky. Just damn lucky. I eventually managed to get up, and looked around. I could see foot prints, but nothing else. Some blood here. Some skin here. But the foot prints just dead ended about three feet away from where I fell. So, I did what any sane person would do: I ran. I grabbed my pack and Clukko and ran. To the nearest town, where I slept inside of a hotel with all of the candles on for the next three days, until the night terrors stopped. Then I bought as many matches as my emergency funds could give and continued traveling. Normally I would just decide this was a nightmare, and I imagined the footprints and blood. But the scar... the scar never faded. I still don't know what it was."

The stranger was so immersed in the story, that he or she would try to follow Mudd when he tried to go away. But eventually he would just thank them for the meal and then the stranger would go away.

/

Midna, of course, had been listening to his pretend story the entire time. She kept trying to figure out what he drew from real emotions and what he just completely pulled out of thin air. Midna wasn't exactly sure WHY she kept trying to do this. Maybe she was just bored. Maybe she was impressed that he could make all of that up at the drop of a hat. Or maybe it was something deeper than any of that... Midna shook that last one off while Mudd spread out his tent nearby the town. He didn't want to leave just yet. He was having too much fun being Will Spider.

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A/N

/

Starlll: Whoa. I got a little bit carried away, there. But still, I wouldn't have done any of it differently. Even Will's explanation on how he got the scar.

Pearson: I had to draw from your own raw emotions to help write that one.  
Starlll: And I thank you for that one! Now, before I end this chapter, I have to say a few things: First off, I've been reading some Dean Koontz lately (he writes horror novels), so I decided to give the brilliant writer some credit by spoofing his name and throwing it in. GO DEAN KOONTZ!

Second, aside from the beginning Author's Notes, I wrote this entire thing in one night. I stayed up kind of late, too, so please appreciate the work I put into it.

And third, finally, you probably enjoyed the made-up story of Will Spider, though you think it was a little bit extraneous. Trust me, it will come into play later in the story. Well, not too much later, but it is important. And this isn't the last that we've seen of Oradon. Mudd, or, should I say, Will, is going to have some fun there.

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I'm not afraid to admit, I had to keep looking over my shoulder while I was writing this part. When I finished, I drowned it out with some www . Homestarrunner . Com videos. So very funny...

/

Word count: (Not including anything after I wrote 'So very funny...') EXACTLY 3500!


	26. The Revelation

A/N

/

My recommendation: Go reread that last chapter before you do this one. It'll help jog your memory. I know, it's been a while.

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Starlll: You know what? I'm not doing an author's notes this time.

/

To: Sean, who's annoying constant pestering led me to finally begin writing this chapter.

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Disclaimer: I own Mudd and Will Spider. Hero belongs to a friend. Everything else belongs to Nintendo.

/

Hey, here's a fun fact you you:

You know the Water Temple, from Ocarina of Time? Yes, the bad memories are probably flooding back to you as we speak. Well, did you know that the game's creator, Shengru Miyamoto, admits that he regrets the design of the Water Temple? I don't blame him, but still!

And you know what else?:

The final boss in Ocarina of Time, Gannon, was originally designed so that you would have to climb up his giant body in order to attack his weak point, similar to that of Megaleg from Super Mario Galaxy [Megaleg was actually taken from that game's original plan]. Miyamoto scrapped this idea, saying that if Gannon was that huge, then the player wouldn't be able to see him very well. But hey, the lightning in the final product sucks, so I can hardly see him as it is... just saying...

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Mudd woke up in an inn. He still hadn't left Oradon, even though it had been nearly 3 days since he first came, and he was supposed to be in and out in an hour. Yet, he kept making some excuse as to why he had to stay at least ONE more minute. Midna, who had very little say in this, just played along.

Mudd, or 'Will Spider', as he was becoming known as, got out of his rented bed, and hobbled down the stairs to the bottom of the 3-story-inn, and sat down at the table. The first floor which Mudd was now seated in was filled with furniture, mostly wooden chairs and tables. A small vase with one or two lone flowers inside nicely decorated the tables, usually only two chairs per table to be seated in. Most of the wooden furniture had a chipping green paint coated onto it, with at least five years worth of wear and tear on it.

But, the furniture was study enough, so Mudd sat down at one, Clukko flapping to his shoulder like he had every morning. It had been a nice touch to the exotic appearance that Will liked to put on. He would sit down at any random table, and out of seemingly nowhere came his pet chicken, who simply seemed to hop right onto his master's arm.

"What'll you have today, Will?" Asked the inn's owner, Telma. She was a nice lady, who offered Will a discount after hearing how he was 'robbed' on his way to Oradon, so he had very little to pay for. She took pity on him, believing everything he made up, even allowing him free toast to go with his breakfast.

"Fried eggs, my good lady." Will said, bowing his head slightly and putting his hand to his head as if he was tipping a hat. Telma smiled and headed to the kitchen.

"Are you planning on getting out of here any time soon, or are you just going to keep freeloading?" Asked Midna, suddenly appearing in the chair in front of him. "Because I'm sure you haven't lied to the banker yet."

Mudd was slightly surprised by her sudden appearance. More often than not, he had forgotten that she was even in his shadow. She had a habit of suddenly popping up when you least expected it. After some time, one would think that this would make it less startling, but it didn't. She always managed to find some way to scare you.

"Don't worry, Midna, I'll be out of here before you know it." Mudd promised. "It's just... for the first time in a while, I'm having... fun."

It was true. Ever since Mudd enlisted in the army, his life had always been lacking. It never was complete. Even when Rutabaga was alive, Mudd never had what he needed. Now, his face hardened by battle, his hair cut too short, and his build completely changed, nobody recognized him. He had a fresh, new slate to carve however he wanted.

"Fun?" Midna repeated. "Fun? Every day you spend in here having FUN, is another day when some town gets invaded by enemy troops. Every day you spend having _fun_, some prisoners of war are getting tortured. And, believe it or not, its your fault for not acting sooner."

They stared at each other. Midna's hard red imp eyes. Mudd's brown eyes. Midna stared at them for a while. Somehow, it slowly grew difficult for her, like she had to blink, look away. But she didn't. They just sat there, staring, until Mudd finally broke the silence.

"Fine. You're right. I'll get out of this town as soon as I finish my breakfast. Okay?"

"You better." Midna went back into his shadow as Telma walked back in.

Telma probably assumed that he was talking to Clukko. It wouldn't be out of the ordinary. He dined with the bird, he slept with it, he walked with it, so talking to him wouldn't be too far of a stretch. She gave him his plate. Two fried eggs with three slices of bacon and a piece on toast. All for the price of the eggs.

"Thank you." Will said modestly, smiling. Telma nodded and went back to working behind the counter. Will dug into the eggs first, laughing as Clukko clucked disapprovingly. The bacon had a familiar crunch to it, a smell Mudd knew all too well. He leaned to the side of the flowers so that he could see Telma. "Telma? Please excuse me for bothering you, but I just needed to know, from where did you get this bacon?"

"_From where did you get this bacon?_" Midna repeated in her mind several times. She would have called Mudd out on this had there not been another person in the room. It just sounded too... pretentious.

"The ranch right up the road." Said Telma smiling and nodding.

"Thank you." Will tipped his imaginary hat again, and went back to eating. Mudd knew that ranch. He used to work there back when he lived with Rusl. It was a blaring reminder that he WASN'T in fact Will Spider, just Mudd, the zora soldier.

He couldn't even finish his breakfast when he had that revelation. He lied to Telma, saying that the food was fine, just that he couldn't finish it because Clukko was feeling very disapproval of him eating a product which his species made. Telma laughed kindly, letting him leave. He paid the little money which he owed (food wasn't the only thing he got a discount on for the fake story about being mugged), and left.

He took the long route out of town, much to Midna's disapproval. He walked past his old house, where Rusl raised him. The paint was peeling right off of it, and most of the windows were cracking. Mudd looked at it, smiling, remembering it for how it was when he was just a child. The lawn was nice and green, the paint was a fresh new coat, and every detail, every shingle was in place.

Mudd took another few steps forward, walking down his street, thinking about how Rusl raised him. He kept walking, the sound of children playing in the background. He walked past his old girlfriend's back yard. He couldn't help but laugh. He had finally had the courage to admit that he liked her when he was 16. Mudd had a crush on her for over a year before they started dating. Then he learned that she was a relationship-obsessed, stalkerish girl who rarely left him an hour of time to himself. He had a crush on her from afar for over a year, and his relationship with her hadn't lasted more than two weeks.

Mudd continued down the street, cutting across an old playground. It had been shut down for almost a year, because kids had taken to playing on the roads, where they were closer to town, and their parents could watch them from the house. Oradon was a farm village, so it was rare that the roads were even used to the degree in which they would have to move their games elsewhere.

The playground was covered with ghosts and memories. A chalk outline of hopscotch, a rusting old set of monkey bars. There once was a time when Mudd had to jump in order to grab hold of the bars. Now he had to duck so that he could get under them. A broken swing set was next to the exit. This brought a small grin to his face when he saw it. He would never admit to it to anyone but Rusl, but he was the one who broke it. He had tried to get high enough to go over the top, but he accidentally fell off, the rope getting caught on his leg and snapping. Mudd was okay, but the swing-set was never fixed.

He always said that someday, he would go back there and fix the rope, that it could still be used. He, of course, never had a chance to, and the very thought had slipped his mind. It fluttered right back in when he saw it, playing the memory over in his mind. Mudd walked to the swing-set, taking one end of the broken rope and tying it to the other with one strong knot. He slowly sat down on it, making sure that the old wooden seat could still support him. It did, but he had to be careful, because he didn't want it to snap unexpectedly.

Mudd knew that it wouldn't do much good, now, as the playground was barren of children, but at least he finally got around to it. The next time he went back to Oradon, after the war blew over, he would fix up that playground, let the neighborhood kids play somewhere fun again, instead of the streets.

The next time. The next time. Mudd stopped rocking in the swing. The next time. The next time. He would never be able to come back home. The next time. The next time. He didn't belong there anymore. They thought he was dead, and he might as well be. The army had changed him, had reshaped him until he couldn't fit back into his own home anymore. Until the very thing he craved, he yearned for since day one was gone. Oradon was a part of his past, now. It would never be his future. Never again. He was a stranger to the town. The people he knew all his life hadn't even recognized him after three entire days of contact. He could never go back home.

Mudd fell backwards off the swing, letting the ground catch him without effort. He wanted to curl into a ball and stay there for the rest of his life, until he would shrivel up and die. This wasn't what he wanted.

Midna floated out of his shadow, watching him for a while. He looked like the definition of weak, like he couldn't walk two steps if he was being held up by another person. A stream of salty tears rolled down his face, yet he didn't make a sound. Gradually, she nudged him with her foot, floating above him.

"Get up." She said, unsure if he would snap at her. "Now."

He didn't.

"Mudd, I swear to Din, get up."

He didn't move.

Midna slowly got down to his level, in front of his face. Looks like she'd have to do something she rarely every did: show sympathy.

"Why are you crying?" She asked.

"I can't go home..." Mudd whispered, his voice quiet and damaged, but not broken.

"You can just go back after the war..." Midna said. Even she knew that was a lie. She hesitated. Maybe she could give another pep talk. "Okay, you lost your home. You can't go back to your family. But you know what?" She stopped. This was generally where the good side came in. Then she remembered: there was none. Midna still had one last trick up her sleeve, though. "Neither can I." She used her imp-hand to lift his chin towards her, forcing him to look her in the eye. "I can't go home. I live in a place... far away, from here. The Twilight Realm. It's a place an entire dimension away from here, and now I can't go back. But you know what I have to do? I have to keep standing, and put one foot in front of the other."

Mudd finally began to get up. He used the fixed swing to support him. He needed something to hold onto. Midna noticed this. Gradually, she floated to his level, and reluctantly held out her hand. Mudd took it.

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A/N

/

Starlll: And we have a new chapter! Yeah, you probably already know that... I mean, you just read the entire chapter. Hopefully. I mean, that would be kind of annoying, if you just skipped right to the end and faked a review.


	27. Rant

I have something very important to discuss with all of my readers. All two of them: BTM and my grandpa. As I have spent more and more time playing more and more video games, I have come across a startling revelation:

ALL VIDEO GAMES ARE THE SAME.

No, I don't actually mean that. It was a hyperbole for the most part. It's more like, "ALL GAMES CAN EASILY BE FIT INTO ONE OF FIVE CATEGORIES!" These four categories that I mentioned are:

1) Shoot. Shoot. Reload. Shoot. Shoot. Reload. Shoot. Shoot. Level complete.

2) Puzzles Galore.

3) Remakes of Previous Games/Movies With Subtle Changes Thrown In.

Arcade.

Standard RPG.

/

SSRSSRSSLC is fairly simple to explain. Halo, Call of Duty, yes, even Fallout fits into this category. I can understand how this may seem appealing, I am, after all, a guy. Even I feel the occasional need to fight an onslaught of aliens or people from other countries. But it just gets OLD after a while. Really, here's a list of all games that could slip right on into this category without even thinking about it:

Call of Duty, Call of Duty 2, Call of Duty 3, Call of Duty 4, Call of Duty 5, Call of Duty 6, Fallout, Fallout 2, Fallout 3, Fallout: Tactics, Fallout: New Vegas, Halo, Halo 2, Halo 3, Star Wars: Battlefront, Star Wars: Battlefront 2... Hopefully you can see where I'm going with this.

So, where do you think it was that SSRSSRSSLC all came from? Any true gamer should know if they think about it hard enough: Duck Hunt. Duck Hunt. You hunt ducks. Level after level, you shoot down ducks, with the occasional dog laughing at you in between. From how I see it, every 2-bit shooter out there is just taking that one idea, and throwing something extra in there.

No matter how many plot twists, characters, weapons, or even graphics you throw in there, it's always the same:

Shoot, shoot, reload.

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Puzzles Galore is simple enough to understand. Basically, you select one thing, have it interact with another thing, and wait for a while while, doing a bunch of other worthless, unavoidable stuff in between. Now, wait a minute, before you write me off as some biased idiot who couldn't solve a puzzle if it only had one piece in it, don't forget that I just insulted the king of all biased idiots in the last section! I can understand the appeal to puzzles. I enjoy that feeling you get when you figure it all out.

Thing is, lately, it feels like "Puzzle Games" have just been the same level design over and over again, getting slightly harder each time.

Think hard for a moment, you know I'm right.

Phoenix Wright seems to have gotten Puzzles right, but if you think about it, and if you're anything like me, you'll wind up just Pressing the witness until you get some clue, or randomly matching evidence to the testimate until you finally manage to duplicate the creator's train of thought, because you have too many morales to use an online walk through.

Some of you are probably thinking of Legend of Zelda right about now. Nope. You see, over the years, LoZ has become **SO EASY** for all those noobs without opposable thumbs that whine to Miyamoto about how 'The puzzles are just too hard!' or 'What do you MEAN by "Play the Sun Song to freeze the Redeads?"'.

So, where did all puzzle games stem from? I would have to say Tetris. Really, think how many Tetris rip-offs there are. Dr. Mario, Dr. Eggman's Mean Bean Machine, Tetris Revolution, Tetris-Gravity, Tuper Tario Tros, Yoshi's Cookie Thingy That's Name Escapes Me, yeah, these are all pretty much direct copies to the game. And they're just the tip of the iceberg!

/

RoPG/MWSCTi are, once again, self-explanatory. They're just trying to keep selling movie tickets to B-Movie franchises. While I will admit, there are a FEW good movie-games out there (Who can forget the immortal Goldeneye?), most of them are like straws: They suck.

Take the latest Prince of Persia game, for example. Actually, don't. Because I'd probably just wind up quoting Yahtzee word for word (1).

Take Lego Star Wars 3, for example. It fits into both the Video Game remake, AND the Movie remake subjects. True, it may be fun building your way through the first few levels, but after about... say, episode 2, level 3, you begin to start wondering: Didn't I JUST solve that puzzle? Don't ALL of the bosses have the **SAME. EXACT. WEAKNESSES**? And, as we all know, there are 6 Star Wars movies (The REAL ones, not that stupid cartoon Clone Wars movie that they tried to pass off as a legit movie). 6 movies, all with roughly the same enemies and boss-fights, infinite lives, and an impossible-to-block, heavily-damaging ground-pound attack make it a complete snooze fest, the only real reason you want to keep playing is to hopefully unlock the Invincibility and ghost characters. Then you do, and nothing changes.

Reread those last six words a few times. "Then you do, and nothing changes." That's essentially the way it is for most video games based off of movies and previous games, now-a-days. Do this, do that, and then do it all over again.

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And now we finally make it the Arcade part. More or less, this is the misc. section of this rant, the entire thing held together by two main qualities: a points system, where your high score is usually saved and displayed, and a Pick-Up-And-Start-Playing capability, the latter of which is self-explanatory.

Now, while I will admit that there are some pretty original ideas and gaming mechanics here, just think of how many remakes there were of Pac-Man, or Pong. And the fighter games are mostly just 'A to punch, B to kick'.

/

A slime draws near!

Fight Item

Magic Run

And you thought that Arcade would be the shortest.

\

Now, as you probably know by now, I still AM a very big fan of gaming. This is why the revelation hit me so hard when I realized it. So, everybody, anybody, start making new games. Don't just make a remake of an already remade game! Break the proverbial ground!

Well, I should probably start writing the chapter right about now... or not...

/

1) Yahtzee is a video game critic who is known for doing an entire 5-minute review with no punctuation or breaks in speech.


	28. Water Slide

A/N

Starlll: I REALLY have to get into a regular-update pattern. My friend, Sean, offered me 20 dollars if I finished by the end of the school year, and, needless to say, that will technically make me a professional writer (I think). ... yeah. On with the story!

/

"How did it go?" Was the first thing Mudd asked Hero.

\

For the readers who have forgotten everything that's been going on recently: Not that I blame you; It's been taking me a while to update. Anywho, I'll make this brief:

Sothe (the knife wielder), Michaiah (the light mage), Hero, Midna, and Mudd had joined together to make a resistance against the war. Along with them joined a gigantic Goron named Mr. E.

They split up (Sothe, Michaiah, and Hero in one group, and Mr. E, Mudd, and Midna in the other), and each were assigned 3 encampments to shut down. Hero's group passed through the desert, Mudd's group passed through Oradon. They pretty much crippled both armies.

Unfortunately, unbeknown to all of them, both armies were preparing a full-scale all-or-nothing assault on the other, ready to end the entire war in one major battle.

/

"We destroyed all three camps." Said Hero.

"Good. Us too." Said Mudd, nodding. He wasn't very surprised; he had heard tales of fewer people doing harder things.

They had joined up somewhere West of Castle Town, a pre-planned destination. It was nearby their next target: the Zora's river. If they could find a way to block off the source, even for a few days, it could easily stop their army from moving, along with the Goron's water supply.

Question was: How?

They were discussing this very question when suddenly a voice rang out.

"Helloooooo! Are you here to go on the boat ride?" It was a woman in a nearby cabin.

"Of what are you talking about?" Asked Mudd, taking on the role of Will Spider yet again. Midna sighed mentally. She thought Mudd had ditched that guise when they left Oradon.

"The boat ride! You go down the Zora river, all the way to Lake Hylia!" She explained. "Some people call it 'White-Water-Rafting'. I call it lots of fun!" She laughed at her own joke, even though it wasn't funny. "So, it's 20 ruppees a piece! Who's in?"

"May we have the luxury of discussing it first?" Asked Will.

She nodded, and the group almost huddled.

"Mudd, what's up with all that goofy talk?" Asked Hero, confused.

"Shut up." Mumbled Mudd, sounding like his old self again.

"Make me."

"I will. Don't think I won't."

"Blargon!"

"Hey, really, what do you think about the ride? It could give us a nice idea of the river. Maybe even a few critical points where we could block it." Midna suggested, breaking the two up.

"Okay, okay, sounds like a plan." Nodded Mudd, turning back into Will Spider, getting his wallet ready.

\

Link pulled a sword out of the chest he had kept hidden all these years. He slowly stared at the gleaming sword. The blade was white and sharp, not one nick or scratch for all the years he had it. The handle was a cobalt blue, perfectly balanced, strong yet light. Even for the 20 years he'd had it, there wasn't one inch of rust. Legendary swords didn't rust, it's what made them legendary. Link felt the power surge through his body. The Master Sword was awakened.


	29. The River

Starlll: Okay, I'll make this short and sweet:

For the readers who have forgotten everything that's been going on recently: Not that I blame you; It's been taking me a while to update.

Sothe (the knife wielder), Michaiah (the light mage), Hero, Midna, and Mudd had joined together to make a resistance against the war. Along with them joined a gigantic Goron named Mr. E.

They split up (Sothe, Michaiah, and Hero in one group, and Mr. E, Mudd, and Midna in the other), and each were assigned 3 encampments to shut down. Hero's group passed through the desert, Mudd's group passed through Oradon. They pretty much crippled both armies.

Unfortunately, unbeknown to all of them, both armies were preparing a full-scale all-or-nothing assault on the other, ready to end the entire war in one major battle.

Also, Link has finally reentered the story, and brought with him the Master Sword. He hasn't joined the group, but he does seem to have some sort of master plan.

Oh, and Clukko's still with them.

They accepted an invitation to go on a boat ride through the Zora river, planning to use it to scout out any weak points to block the water flow, crippling the Zora movement and the Goron's water supply.

/

Mudd and Hero hopped into the canoe-sized rowboat at the base of the river. They decided that they should, as Midna wasn't very good in the light (it burned her body), Michaiah and Sothe weren't as savvy in terms of looking for natural weak points, and Mr. E honestly couldn't fit in the boat.

Mudd glanced at Hero while the owner of the boat began to untie the string. He honestly didn't trust Hero. That's not to say that he expected Hero to slip a knife in him while his back was turned; but he certainly would rather have his old friend, Rutabaga at his side.

He had no idea what happened to Rutabaga after he abandoned the Zora army. He assumed that he was still working as a soldier. Mudd smiled, recalling a piece of advice Rut had given him when he first started out.

\

"_Your superiors won't know how to use you at first. You'd be surprised how long it'd take before they so much as decide to let you fight. So, my recommendation, is to get them to notice you. The best way to do this isn't to do well during drills. No, that's definitely not the best way. If you ask me, it's to squeeze through loopholes._"_ Rutabaga sat down next to Mudd. "They ask you to rake the leaves? Do it. One leaf at a time. They ask you to go get water? Only fill the bottom of the bucket. You've got nothing to lose, and the road less traveled has a habit to be the shorter one."_

/

Mudd chuckled a bit. He took Rutabaga's advice. He never really moved up in rank, but he knew that the generals, even King Rails himself, recognized his face. In some ways, that was better. In a crowd, people tend to learn the jester's face faster than the host.

He glanced over at Hero again, wondering what the man was thinking. He wouldn't be disappointed, philosophically.

Hero was thinking about why he had decided to join the army. He never really wanted to join it. He never had a moment where he thought, 'I wanna be a soldier!'. No, he never knew what he wanted to be. Hero barely made it through high school. He could hardly hold a job. So, joining the Goron army just seemed like the logical choice. Then he found that he was good at fighting. Very good. Yet, it never seemed REAL to him. That was part of the reason why he was so willing to join Mudd in the rebellion.

Then the owner untied the rope, and the boat began moving.

Mudd nearly stood up in surprise, having been snapped out of his daydream. The small boat began rocking and shaking in the current, and almost threw him out while Mudd regained his balance. He put a hand on either side of the rim, and sat down. Hero was in front, paddling to either side, trying to get it to go straight.

Gradually, they managed to go with the current of the lake, which was going at a fast pace. Mudd used his oar to help Hero, water occasionally splashing in his face. Water had never been his enemy. He could swim like an otter for as long as he could remember, and could hold his breath longer than anyone he knew. Growing up, Rusl joked that he was 'Part Zora'. Mudd doubted this, in spite of constant remarks that he was 'shaped like a Zora'.

After he gain his bearings, this was no different. Hero, on the other hand, hated it. He couldn't swim until he turned 15, and even then it was mostly just a dog paddle. He feared falling out of the side, knowing that he probably wouldn't be able to stay above the rapids.

Mudd noted a narrow part of the river as they passed it, figuring it would be easier to block. Glanced around for ways that they could build a make-shift dam. Bombs seemed like the most obvious choice; find a place to plant them, then use them to knock down the sides and block it off. But, he realized, they didn't have any explosives.

Suddenly, the river made a sharp turn. They both worked to go along with it, but it was difficult. The front side flipped around, sending them completely backwards. Mudd reacted first, spinning in his seat, trying to steer when the boat was flipped around.

"Damn!" Shouted Hero, his paddle slipping out of his hand. He tried to grab at it, but he couldn't reach.

Mudd pushed the boat away from a wall as the river depressed lower into the ground, turning into a ravine. He and Hero managed to turn the boat back to normal, and Mudd quickly switched spots with Hero, who lost his oar.

He steered around several rocks in the way, wondering what sick person rode this river and thought it was FUN. He felt Hero lean to the left or right as the turned, helping him somewhat. Mudd would have preferred him to still have an oar, but it was better than nothing.

Mudd looked down the river and swore. Loudly.

"Get ready to hold your breath!" He shouted over the rapids. "And keep your legs straight when they hit the water!"

Whoosh!

The river ended in an abrupt waterfall, shooting them down into Lake Hylia. Mudd grabbed Hero's arm as they blasted over the 4-story drop, both their leg's slowly moving, as if they were trying to gain some kind of ground under them. The hang time seemed to last forever, adrenaline pumping through their bodies.

Gradually they began to descend, time slowing down as they fell. They held their breath as velocity took hold, biting the bullet and preparing to break the surface. Hero closed his eyes, his mind flashing back to the time he was catapulted across a battlefield.

Mudd, on the other hand, felt his normal fear of heights replaced by a sudden thrill, a freedom which he never felt before. Some primal instinct surged it's way forward, one that told him that this was the difference between life and living.

Then they hit the water.

They broke the surface, their feet feeling 10 feet below the rest of their bodies, before their stomachs snapped back like a rubber band. Mudd opened his eyes underwater, being a fantastic swimmer, and stroked his way back to the top. Hero gradually made it back up, not as comfortable with being in such deep water. He had lived with Gorons his entire life, and wasn't used to the lakes and oceans which Zoras inhabited, rather the shallow hot springs.

They both took a few deep breaths, watching as their boat landed safely in the water. Mudd slapped himself in the forehead; had they stayed in the boat, they wouldn't have been hurt.

"Wasn't that fun?" Asked a Zora, suddenly swimming up to them. "I'll go get your boat, and tow you two back up the waterfall!"

Mudd and Hero sank down into the water, wondering why they ever paid for this.

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A/N

/

Starlll: So, I feel like I know why its taking so long for me to update: I don't have much to look forward too. I mean, all the stuff I've been planning, all the twists and cliffhangers, have all been written. Look at some of the stuff that's happened. Rutabaga's died, Mudd the first lived, I introduced Mr. E, what's left? (Sighs) So, now I just need to think of an epic way to think to end it.


End file.
